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Original poster

To expect parents not to have child’s birthday party on Xmas Eve

375 replies

I88l · 04/12/2023 11:33

One of my daughter’s school friends has a birthday party on Xmas Eve.
i think the idea of inviting school kids to a birthday party on Xmas eve is pretty odd, because Xmas Eve should be spent with family.

OP posts:
SnapdragonToadflax · 04/12/2023 12:31

I'd quite like that, nice thing to do for a couple of hours with a hyped up small child and I don't have any other plans beyond wrapping/prep. Even better if old enough to drop off! (Mine isn't yet...)

I'm not sure where the assumption you spend the day with family came from - we'll see them on Christmas Day and maybe Boxing Day, but not Christmas Eve. Christmas Eve is for last-minute shopping, cooking prep, decorating if you have people coming over. I used to work when I worked in retail, as will many who work in the NHS/care/emergency services. It's not a public holiday.

Obviously if you want to spend the day with your family you can, but it's not a given.

LlynTegid · 04/12/2023 12:33

Politely decline. Children don't choose when to be born.

WillowTit · 04/12/2023 12:33

i dont think it should be spend with family
when they are older op your dc may be spending Christmas eve at the pub, their new family

OooohAhhhh · 04/12/2023 12:34

I sympathise with parents who have Christmas babies.
My child's birthday is a few days after Xmas.
Christmas time is already a busy time as it as & we do get that. I wanted a party as close to my son's birthday as possible. Couldn't have it during the working week prior to Xmas as everyone is working, so my options were sat 23rd or sun 24th, I went with sat 23rd.
But who's to say 23rd wasn't booked up so they had to go with the Xmas eve?
Can't have it during the week after Xmas as people are working, so that leaves new years eve weekend which is also really inconvenient.
Can't please everyone I suppose.
If you don't want to go then decline so another child can take their place.

Clydagh · 04/12/2023 12:35

Ploctopus · 04/12/2023 11:38

There’s no ‘should’ involved - people can do what they like at Christmas. That includes you, obviously, so if you don’t want to go just politely decline.

Exactly.

SnapdragonToadflax · 04/12/2023 12:35

Oh and from the ages of about 16-28 I was definitely out with friends boozing! Admittedly not the age you're talking about, but Christmas Eve was for friends, not family.

CaineRaine · 04/12/2023 12:35

Well I’m working on Christmas Eve so my child would love to go to a party then. Just decline if it doesn’t work for your family but it’s shortsighted to think it won’t work for everyone!

Goldbar · 04/12/2023 12:36

They would get a fair number of attendees around here. Not everyone is away or busy with family. If they invited the whole class, I expected they'll end up with around 8-10 at least, which is perfect for a party at home or at an activity venue. Most parties are too big imo.

CharityShopChic · 04/12/2023 12:37

When my kids were little this would have been awesome, get at least one of them out of the house for a bit, dial down the "santa's coming" excitement and tire them out a bit.

Dramatic · 04/12/2023 12:37

Backtoreality1 · 04/12/2023 11:37

If the childs birthday is on Christmas eve then of course she should have her party then. if it was your child you would do the same. Suck it up....must be hard enough for the poor kid already having a birthday that day.

I wouldn't, I'd do it a week or two before

MonkeyToez · 04/12/2023 12:37

@Vuurhoutjies

Unfortunately my birthday is a few days after xmas so most peoples excuses involve being hungover/tired/skint.

Its not so bad now, my partner always makes a fuss and often we'll go for a meal with my family or something, but as a child its obviously crap having nobody turn up for you. I don't think I'd enjoy a party too much now having young kids but maybe in a few years!

I just would hate to think of a poor childs xmas being tainted by the disappointment of not getting to celebrate their birthday the way other kids do.

Ponderingwindow · 04/12/2023 12:38

I would feel pretty bad for the child because many people wouldn’t be able to attend, even if they really wanted to make it on another day. I wouldn’t decline unless I had an actual conflict though.

we do have a conflict. We balance multiple families by having a big family celebration on Christmas Eve.

CatamaranViper · 04/12/2023 12:39

The only part of Christmas eve I personally care about is the late afternoon/evening. We go to the pub then walk around the area and look at all the lights, then hang up stockings and read Christmas story. Then once DS is in bed, DH and I are usually assembling toys and wrapping presents and generally setting up/prepping.

A birthday party in the morning/early afternoon sounds ideal!

JudgeJ · 04/12/2023 12:39

Noshowlomo · 04/12/2023 11:37

Depends how old. My son is now 4.5 so I would stay with him so no, I’d decline. When he’s older and it’s drop off then yes, so I can do some wrapping and last minute bits

Edited

A friend's child's birthday was on Christmas Eve and his friends' parents were delighted to drop them off on someone else for a couple of hours in the afternoon! It was a very popular invitation.

Daisies12 · 04/12/2023 12:41

it's none of your business. just decline if you can't or don't want to go. Not everyone celebrates christmas.

Hopingforno2in2024 · 04/12/2023 12:42

I think it’s a great idea. Wears the kids out and keeps them distracted for a couple of hours.

southlondoner02 · 04/12/2023 12:43

I have discovered that only on MN are people so rigid about christmas. People shouldn't have kid's birthday parties on Christmas Eve, married couples always have to be together at Christmas. In reality people do all sorts of things and if it works for them, why so much judgement.

If no one turns up I expect they'll do something different next year.

Couldyounot · 04/12/2023 12:44

AbondonedThemePark · 04/12/2023 12:05

These people "should" have hurried up and got it out on the 23rd, or held it in until the 27th, obviously...

😆

Show quote history

He wasn't due until 8 January, impatient sod 🤣🤣🤣

CloudPop · 04/12/2023 12:45

Hopingforno2in2024 · 04/12/2023 12:42

I think it’s a great idea. Wears the kids out and keeps them distracted for a couple of hours.

Agree

MangshorJhol · 04/12/2023 12:46

Well given that DH is working Christmas Eve (and we are not Christian) I would be more than happy for this. Also, a friend used to have a party on Xmas Eve every year and lots of people went to it (with their kids)…
I didn’t know there were Christmas Eve ‘Rules’.

PastelHouses · 04/12/2023 12:47

This reply has been deleted

This is a goady troll so we've removed their posts.

enchantedsquirrelwood · 04/12/2023 12:47

And herein lies the biggest problem with Christmas - everyone turns in on themselves and it's family only.

Why? Is it a British thing or is it also verboten to see friends at Christmas in other countries?

That said, it is a bit odd to have a birthday party on Christmas Eve, unless it's the morning.

GhoulWithADragonTattoo · 04/12/2023 12:48

My DH's work always has a kids party on Xmas Eve (or last working day before) with Father Christmas and entertainment. My kids love going and means I can finish cleaning or any last minuite wrapping before guests arrive. A lot of people have christmas parties on Christmas Eve.

MayThe4th · 04/12/2023 12:50

Good for them.

So many kids with birthdays around Christmas time get overlooked because people are so busy with Christmas.

My mum’s birthday is Christmas Day and as a child she watched her siblings having parties and multiple presents for their birthdays while she got one extra thing because “we had to spend on Christmas”. And I know of so many other children who experience the same.

I think it says more about the people declining than the parents, because those people are happy for a small child to grow up thinking that their birthday just isn’t important because it’s Christmas.

As for “Christmas eve should be spent with family,” perhaps you’d like to tell my employer that, and have the shops closed as well so those people can spend it with their families?

autienotnaughty · 04/12/2023 12:56

If it's day time I would make the effort and go as it's lovely for the children and a lot of people might have plans. Bonus if I don't have to stay