School parent deliberately coughing on me every morning

[Happyluce]

A school parent keeps deliberately coughing on me. We stand outside the gates and then in the play ground waiting to go in and they don’t cough for all that time. But As soon as they are next to me they fake cough really loud without covering their mouth or they deliberately clear their throat really loud behind me. This keeps happening every morning. I feel like it’s a way of trying to bully me without speaking to me. What would you do?

I'd do this, he will click if he's doing it on purpose. If that gets a reaction from him it's the perfect reason to sound him out.

Your often coughing

Then stare at him to fill in the rest of the sentence

Or just say the unsaid stare stuff

without covering your mouth.

I could really do without catching what's making you cough so bad. It sounds nasty.

Not gonna lie, sometimes I fake cough or yawn as I feel awks on the school run and don't know what to do with myself at the gates (because obvs everyone is looking at me) 😂. Not on anyone tho, that's weird

Ps he defo fancies you

Do a mcgonnegal (not spelt that right at all!) And say, do you need a cough drop?

Eww, yuck - a space invader. Two options, OP.

1. A big long pointy umbrella, or a pair of trekking poles. Held under your arm, horizontally, point backwards. Wave ‘em around a bit. He comes near you, he gets stabbed.

2. When you sense him behind you, turn round, stern look, hard Paddington stare, “Please would you move back, you’re standing too close. And cover your mouth when you cough.” And turn around before he can reply.

Just chiming in to say I agree with this.

This kind of spiteful micro-aggression (something designed to look very deniable) is fairly common (men saying "Excuse me!" very loudly to make me move/jump when I'm nowhere near them).

It's a creepy control thing.

There's a weirdo at a work site I used to be on who would wait till people had sat down in a particular communal place, then claim he "needed to get something from the cupboard underneath them" so they had to get up.

They'd look churlish if they said no. He did it so he could get a reaction and dominate them.

It was an indicator of other stalking creepy things he did - tried to log into people's laptops/phones and break their passwords, claimed he "needed them for security reasons"...I've left but last I heard he was still doing the same thing (if not worse).

Cough variant asthma or a tic wouldn't explain the inability to cover the mouth though. I'm asthmatic and cough at night these days if I'm outside in cold air. But it doesn't stop me from covering my own mouth.

Woman up, tell him to cover his fucking mouth. Yuk.

Are you pushing in the queue? Is he actually coughing or is he doing an over dramatic "ahem" to try to get your attention?

Just say do you mind, really loudly.

Get directly behind him in the queue, then blast him with an air horn concealed up your sleeve.

When he turns around, say 'sorry, I've got a bit of a cough.'

Do you smoke or do you smell of cigarette smoke? It might be a passive aggressive act of disapproval?

I wish pp would stop trying to make excuses for the gross, unhygienic and aggressive behaviour of this man. The op has already said this man is targeting her and it's not due to perfume or smoke. Not sure why it's so hard to believe as people do behave in extremely awful ways! I just hope the op can avoid this person or let him know in very harsh terms not to cough on her. Trying to explain away this man's actions is why some women end up in unnecessary and dangerous situations.

Totally agree. Besides, if she did smell of perfume or smoke he’d be avoiding her, not purposely standing near her at every opportunity! 🤣

I'd put money on him being a wanker.

I didnt realise symptoms of reflux included coughing into very specific people's faces and not covering your mouth! What odd behavioural symptoms reflux has 🙄

Next time he comes up behind you, walk to the back of the queue.

Lovely lot of gaslighting the OP going on here.

I'd do one of the following:

Go to queue up until he is in line behind you then remember something you left in the car and go back for it. Bonus points for exclaiming something that only half makes sense as you do so

Act WEIRD. Jitter, dance backwards and forwards seemingly oblivious to his personal space, feet and your handbag bumping and shoving around at groin height.

Act normal but when he coughs deliberately step back onto his foot HARD. "Oops I'm sorry I startled when you coughed in my ear..."

When you go to queue up look him square in the eyes and say loudly in front of others, "please stop queueing next to me, it seems to result in you getting in my personal space and coughing with your mouth uncovered every time, and I don't want to be coughed over."

Large golf umbrella with a pointy end. Carried under your arm pointing backwards to force some personal space. Preferably with some unpredictable accidental swinging as you turn. If he says anything tell him "yes best not stand so close" "It's my new top secret hobby." Again, don't be afraid to come across as weird.

I think most people that are 'making excuses' more just don't understand why it's even bothering her. I ignore people I don't know who are coughing or whatever. I'd move away if they were spluttering into my hair.

Maybe I'm unusually thick-skinned or something. But I'm sorry, just because she doesn't like it, it doesn't mean it's bullying. Unless I'm missing something and what she actually means is that he's doing that juvenile thing of coughing the word 'slag' or something into his fist as she passes so everyone sniggers?

Offer them a hanky 😂. Just say really loud coughs and sneezes spread diseases here's a hanky to catch yours since you always try share with me I'll share with you x

I really hope it’s not on purpose, or goodness me what an idiot.

as per other person on here, either say

1. can you cover your mouth please or
2. keep away from him, he sounds weird.

I would get some decent masks (FFP2 or similar) and start wearing them for school pick up/drop off.

If Its in the morning and he suffers reflux it could be perfectly innocent.

Another vote for moving behind him or stepping aside with your DC to let him pass you.
If he is being an oddball ( which it sounds like he is ) he will probably try to get in to your space even after you’ve moved away and you will know for sure if it’s a nervous cough / allergic to your perfume or he’s trying to get your attention and then you can call the behaviour out.