Partner not come home freaking out and angry

[annabel586]

My partner went for Christmas party with work last night, he was going to drive but called me about 7 saying he was getting a cab home at 10. He tried calling me twice about 9.30 but I was in the shower so missed the calls.

Been calling him back ever since and he's not answering at all- rings through to voicemail. This is VERY unlike him as he always keeps in touch and calls me back etc

I know it's only been a couple of hours but I'm going out of my mind with worry now. I'm so angry but upset as well, I would never do this.

Not the result I was expecting...I think that would done a dealbreaker for me, sorry op for my comment early on.

Well, I think another woman would be preferable to the fact that he drove home drunk and totalled someone else’s car. So … yeah.

Either way game over.

God I'm so sorry op. What an absolute fool (him, obvs).

He would have had to blow under 35 (I think) to leave the police station. If he was slurring his words at 7pm we can assume he was well and truly hammered and it would take hours for the breathalyser to be low enough to release him.

I don’t understand @annabel586

He has no keys. So do you mean you have left your house unlocked or do you mean he will get there and be locked out? Do you live together or was he just staying at your house?

Might he break a window to get in? I think I would have told him not to bother coming home.

Stupid question I hope

they won't let him drive home will they? Does he get to drive while awaiting court judgement?

You know that it's not compulsory to have those two things on the same key rimg, what a strange question

They have to blow 40 or under the receive the charge... but i thought he had been missing since 9pm or so

Wow! At least you know where he is but I would be livid too.

standards I have from the beginning of relationships are no cheating, no lying and no drink driving!

you have A LOT to think about .

Op that sound unforgivable. Drink driving wow. Does he not know the law.

I would stay far away as possible

My ex was kept overnight. Was not allowed to phone home - another punishment they said. They did bring him home in a police car so I know he was there all night.

You still get to drive until you go to court.

OP I'm so sorry, hopefully you can get some comfort from your mum until you figure out what you're going to do x

Well... OP... your lives will never be the same again. Good move to take yourself off and have some space.

I have no personal experience of this, I hasten to add. It's just what I've heard from others for something far more minor than drunk driving.

If I were you... I would take yourself off this thread now, it will not help you, whilst you deal with the implications of your relationship going forward, his job and whether he can keep it, him not being able to drive, insurance premiums and the fact this will be I think, 7 years before the record is expunged... if that.

What an absolute bellend.

We have ours in January when people have less on and have been paid again! 😁

edit to add: just saw your update OP. Good for you getting out of the house today.

Don't you have the right to a phone call?

That's a strange wasy for them to look at it, the person being punished in that way is the poor one sat at home with no clue where theirblobed one. Is. Is that really police policy ?

If he blew over 120 he will stay in custody until he attends court (Monday morning most likely) if under that then yes he can drive until his court case.

He's very lucky it was just another car that he damaged.

This will have a massive impact on his future. Employment, cost of insurance etc.

You must be livid. A lot will depend on his reaction to this.

Yeah I’d be sceptical as fuck about this. Too scared to phone and face the music would be my guess

Hi OP...I agree that you should have breathing space at mums and go to that party alone tonight...them go bk to mums for night again. Leave him to stew. The fact that he also banged someone else's car....you know OP. My father killed a woman when he was dui. She had family, kids and husband.
You said he rarely drinks, luckily he didn't kill anyone or himself...see what he says...i wouldn't be talking divorce yet, but let him talk without you saying anything..when hes finished...then you can let loose.

Absolute knob. How unbelievably selfish, he easily could have killed someone. That’s his license gone for a year minimum… does he rely on a car for getting to work? Does he need in for work/drive a van etc?
It would be a deal breaker for me tbh, but then I’ve seen the consequences of drunk drivers.

He would have a solicitor and definitely be allowed a phone call. To the pp who claimed her partner wasn’t. Maybe he phoned someone else or didn’t want to phone you?

Holy shit. What a cunt. Hope nobody was hurt.