AIBU to ask for your real life Hyacinth Bucket quotes

[JustAGirlScotland]

Went to a Christmas fair with my mum at the weekend.

She spotted some Norwegian style Christmas napkins that she liked. Passed them to me and asked, "Are these 3 ply? I will not buy napkins that are less than 3 ply".

It really made me laugh and I wondered if others have Hyacinth style quotes from friends/family?

It was me to my shame. We were looking at new build houses in a crazy fast paced market and between 2 towns but one was a slightly smaller house. I embarrassingly said we should go for the other one because then we would have the biggest house on the street.

I'm the opposite of posh and our house has a view of the local dump but DH has never let me forget it.

I live here.
Locals often say they live in St Evernage - it's a local joke after an unknowing weather presenter misread the name of the town on TV.

I once caught myself complaining that the palm trees in my garden were blocking the sun.

This is everything!! You & your sister are gas 😆I am not a cake fan BUT I love cheese so now I want to be a "Hyacinth" & have a "naice" cheese board with utensils

Snap!! In the late 1950s my mum used to work at an upmarket hairdressing salon. One of the clients was a Mrs Sidebottom but had always to be addressed as 'Mrs Siddybo-tom'.

We had a large event at work and we had to send our boss to Tesco to pick up some supplies that had been missed.
He told us all about how he's saved the day by picking up the missing items but insisted that "next time can we arrange a click and collect from Waitrose? I absolutely cannot go into Tesco again!"
The next time the event came around, we were in a planning meeting and he said "you're not going to make me go to Tesco again, are you!?"

Child from DD's school, only ever invited for playdate once. Awful little snob, spent most of playdate boasting about what a lot of money her parents earn, and following day at school told DD my [homemade] sandwiches (with homemade bread I might add) were 'really weird', because she only ever eats Waitrose sandwiches. Now a running joke in our family, urgh how fraight-fully common, are those not Waitrose. Suggested DD should respond with, 'of course M&S is better...for those who can afford it.'

I complimented a man in works jumper, his response was “it’s cashmere darling”

May I recommend this naice chesseboard with matching utensils.
Best of all, you can get the board engraved 😁

You will be the envy of all, at your next candlelight supper
You can bring out yiur inner Hyacinth with
"one moment, I am fetching the Plateau de Fromages".

https://www.gettingpersonal.co.uk/personalised-large-rectangular-wooden-cheeseboard/GP-26929.html?gad_source=1&gclid=CjwKCAiAx_GqBhBQEiwAlDNAZo_FzM37qLAqPj8b9EeaLRxB-U6Um37oRpWZb03BMiggqPQ5KWMPkRoCUWQQAvD_BwE#

Reading the cake fork post reminded me of dc being about 6 and her being handed a slice of cake at a friend’s house. Loads of dc all shovelling in cake and dd not eating. Host says “are you okay poppet?” And dd looks her straight in the face with big eyes and says “I need a cake fork” 🙈 df got her a fork but this really wasn’t a cake fork kind of house or occasion.

DH’s aunt once told someone that her husband was “big in concrete”, he was a builder!

A certain posh little madam came to my 8th birthday party.
DM had made a lovely spread of sandwiches, home made buns and a birthday cake.
”Oh, you do your own baking? How quaint!”
I hate to think what she grew up into…

“I absolutely love my Louis Vuitton handbag!” Hyacinth said with a smile and a propos de rien, swinging the expensive, turgid brown monstrosity as she walked along the street.

I have 2 auntys by marriage. 1 grew up landed gentry, all Concorde, diamonds and Bollanger, the other lower middle class, both parents worked, 2nd hand cars and camping. Both lovely ladies.
1st one gave me advice not to wear the same shoes 2 days running because that’s how you wear them out and damage your feet. Weird but ok.
when we bought our house in a village it could be described as rustic and a development opportunity. She lived nearby and came to see, totally got that it was that we could afford etc but when we went back to hers for tea she said to her neighbours that we were so wise to buy a period property because you know they’re build well and age well and you don’t have to make up for the lack of style. Neighbours daughter had a huge beautiful new build which could have fitted ours in the garage. I think she was defending me, but Dh kept saying “so lucky it’s a period house” every time a bit fell off and left us open to the elements.

My grandma in the 70s. My parents lived in leytonstone and she was visiting them. A cat dragged into the house a packet of pate it had found on the streets. My grandma said to my dad "Pate? In Leytonstone?"

This is outing so I've changed my username ...I'm actually a Mrs Bucket(t) and some people like doctors do stumble over it and sometimes opt for Bouquet😁.

Someone I know when having her first child went through her name shortlist, all of them ridiculous. Bartholomew etc and finally when she'd settled on a name she reasoned, 'it will look good in the boardroom' I secretly hope he'll grow up to be compère at Haven Holidays.

I fell off my bike as a child and bashed a cheek on the handle bar. Trying to find something cold to reduce the swelling, my Mum grabbed a real rarity, a piece of rump steak from the fridge. She told me to hold it to my cheek x go back out to play so the neighbours could see it!

Apparently someone I know well has called me Hyacinth Bucket because when people come round for tea or coffee if I don't know whether they take milk I bung some milk in a jug for them. On the other hand I've been told I'm definitely not posh because I often serve wine in small French-cafe-style tumblers. So take your pick.

I was meeting a friend at a restaurant. I phoned her and said ‘Shall I book a table?’

She said ‘Oh, no need, there’ll be room.’

I said ‘But isn’t it more elegant to book?’

Her reply: ‘What the fuck are you ON, Choc?’

😳

My mum thinks she’s posher than she is. She’s from a working class family in a rundown Northern town - where I lived at the time of when this happened (she’s since moved abroad). A few years ago she was talking about flowers and said ‘flaaaaars’. I do take the piss when she Hyacinth Buckets and she’s usually very good with it. I said “Flaaaars? Do you mean flowers” and she turned round and said “Well I’m not like you, I’m not from Rundown Northern Town Name”.

The funny thing is - she is. She literally was born and raised there. I was born and raised in a v posh area and had moved to Rundown Northern Town 😂

Oh my god this has exceeded any of my (common obviously!) expectations!! My candlelit suppers will never be the same again 😍 plus it is Black Friday 💪

Go raibh míle mhaith agat @minou123 & yes it will always & evermore be "plateau de Fromages"

We heard about a serviceman who asked his CO or whoever for his next posting to be the Hebrides, he's heard it was very nice. He was very angry though when the posting came through, I going to somewhere called the f'ing Heee-brides, wherever that is. Apparently he's never seen
it written down.

Aldi once sold a bunch of hyacinths and the label read “Hyacinth Bouquet.” True story.

Thank you all; this thread had given me some much-needed laughter!

We used to buy whisky, gin etc. 'loose', take your own bottle, it was real rot gut stuff and we poured it, or decanter it, into normal bottles! Obviously, not in the UK.