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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Teacher exposing breast.

270 replies

bamboostalks · 12/03/2008 15:39

This sounds bizarre and I think it is really. Dsd is in year 6 and they are having the sex ed programme. Anyway, this week it was all about pregnancy and birth. The teacher has just returned from maternity leave and imo went into way too much detail for 10 and 11 year olds(discussing stitches etc. dsd was very intrigued, arriving home with a lot of questions!!) but most astonishingly showed them her breast to explain how the baby feeds. Now this is nothing new to dsd per se who has seen me bf all year but I was amazed. Dh wanted to go in and complain today and I received a couple of phone calls asking me to sign a petition "We think that this teacher needs further training etc." Quite moderate in tone really. AIBU or was this teacher totally wrong?

OP posts:
theBOD · 13/03/2008 10:54

interested to see some people even think breastfeeding infront of the class is fine.

Hulababy · 13/03/2008 10:57

Breastfeeding is generally discrete without the need to expose oneself. So I think this is a very different situation to the OP's scenario.

However I would still recommend a teacher to think twice about breastfeeding infront of their class of 10-11 year olds. I would suggest they brought someone in from outside instead; someone a little more removed from the pupil-teacher relationship.

TBH that relationship can be very finely balanced as it is; and maintaining that balance is crucial. It doesn't take much to knock it off line.

redadmiral · 13/03/2008 11:04

I find it hard to get shocked over this, though I can understand why people might.

Out of all my school teachers the eccentrics and the ones who did things differently were the ones who I remember the most, and who gave me more in the end in terms of education. The plodders who went by the rulebook didn't make that much impression, and I found a lot of conventional schooling dull.

Maybe it's just that I'm drawn to people who are a bit different - but I wouldn't have a problem with this unless I felt that she had a sexual agenda and was creeping the children out.

morningpaper · 13/03/2008 11:06

I don't believe this, simply because I don't see what question could be asked that you would require a breast to answer. (Except maybe 'Miss can I see your tits?')

totalmisfit · 13/03/2008 11:10

after i had dd i got so blase about the whole biology of giving birth etc that i remember sitting round the dinner table with dp's family going on and on in rather graphic detail about how i'd had to have two episiotomies! i can just picture his fil's face now! i think the birth process and new mother hormones just made me lose all my inhibitions. i cringe a bit now tho'

morningpaper · 13/03/2008 11:15

lol totmisfit: I remember about a week after giving birth, I raised my leg to show DH the midwife's 'great job on the stitches'

OMG he was HORRIFIED

I thought I had turned him gay

SorenLorensen · 13/03/2008 11:20

No, of course it's not OK, don't be daft.

But this thread has made me roar laughing, so thanks for that.

Caz10 · 13/03/2008 11:25

still not sure if the OP is for real, but got me thinking - i quite happily feed in front of family/friends/strangers/anyone...but if for some reason (can't imagine what it would be!) i was asked to feed in front of my class (yr4) i couldn't do it! i just don't think a teacher could do what she did no matter how sleep deprived or loony

Vulgar · 13/03/2008 11:25

I kind of think it IS Ok to show the class her breast.

I just think we need to be more open about breastfeeding.

I'm sure there was no subversive reason why she did it. It was probably an impulsive gesture which she is regretting now.

The last thing she needs are parents baying for her blood.

some people just like complaining about those in charge of their children.

Hulababy · 13/03/2008 13:18

"I just think we need to be more open about breastfeeding. "

But she was NOT breastfeeding. There was no baby even resent in the vicinity. Isn't that the point?

batters · 13/03/2008 15:33

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Cam · 13/03/2008 15:44

To answer you Janni as you mentioned my name, she will be sacked because she has undoubtedly breached her contract.

Outside of being a stripper I can't think of one job where it would not be a sackable offence to get your tit out.

I'm not Madame LeFarge and see no baying on this thread

Its just so obvious

Cam · 13/03/2008 15:48

From the book "A tale of two titties"

MadamePlatypus · 13/03/2008 15:48

I wouldn't do anything about it.

I doubt that the head teacher is unaware of what has happened.

I agree that its not culturally 'the thing to do' to show your breast in public, and that should be respected. However, breasts are for feeding babies, so I can't get too worked up about it.

talkingmongoose · 13/03/2008 15:49

Ooh, batters, was it on Big Brother?

Quite an early series?

Cam · 13/03/2008 15:52

Ok, for those of you who think what the teacher did was ok:

Tell me where, in front of other people's children, you would get your tit out (unless you were breastfeeding your baby)

batters · 13/03/2008 15:56

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Pennies · 13/03/2008 16:14

At least she didn't start expressing.

redadmiral · 13/03/2008 16:36

Er, Cam, I get changed in front of my friend's children in the communal changing room at the pool.

Is that ok in your book?

Cam · 13/03/2008 16:48

I don't have a book

Blandmum · 13/03/2008 16:53

The thing is RA, when you are a teacher much of what you are able to do with the class is because you set up a vert particular relationship with the children that you teach.

We have very little by way of sanctions that we can use with them and 90% of what you manage to teach is because you generate a 'persona' in the classroom. With luck it is someone that they like and can trust, but you cannot really be their fried, you can only be their teacher. Because teachers hae to ask them to do things that they don't want to do, and friends tend not to do that.

If you step outside the 'persona' and change the relationship you can lose control in the classroom. This is particularly true of younger kids.

By showing them her breast she will have changed the relationship and because they are young kids, and young kids are childish (!) she may well have the devil's own job getting the relationship back on trach so that she can effectivly control and teach her class.

Unless you have seen a classroom dynamic like this first hand, you tend not to ralise its importance.

Blandmum · 13/03/2008 16:53

and RA, you don't need that sort of realtionship with your friends children, unless you are also their teacher

Breizhette · 13/03/2008 16:56

Cam, what about on the beach?
I agree this was an odd thing to do but I can't really understand why one would get so shocked and upset about it. It's just the human body and these were not genitals.

mrsdannydyer · 13/03/2008 17:00

can't see why the teacher, cannot bf in front of the class. i think it would make a really intersting "real" lesson

redadmiral · 13/03/2008 17:01

I understand - was only answering Cam's question.

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