Ridiculous comments about red hair

[SweetSouls]

My child has a lot of fiery red hair. They are a year old.

They get lots of nice comments - old ladies in particular love him.

However I get some weird ones too. ‘Still ginger’, one of my friends comments whenever they see him.

Well this morning on the train, a woman came up to me to tell me my child would be very badly bullied at school because of the way they look.

They are one year old. Why would someone come and say that to me? It is absolutely bizarre.

Yeah that's rude.

I have a red-headed son too, he was a big hit with the wee old ladies when I was pushing him round the supermarket as a baby, and a veritable celebrity when we took him to Spain at 6 months old.

Your "friends" wouldn't dream of commenting on your baby's skin colour, eye colour, or any other aspect of his appearance. "Ginger-ism" is not OK. It's not acceptable, it's not funny. I would have to pick them up on it and say something.

We live in Scotland where redheads are more common, DS was one of three in his primary school class and was never bullied for his hair colour.

What was the stupid melt expecting you to do - send him back and order a new baby with different colour hair? Rude cow.

As for your 'friend'? 'Still ginger' - 'Yep. Still a c*nt' <pointing>

Red hair is GORGEOUS!

I agree.

Imagine if you commented on a baby’s skin colour in a negative way.

You’d be a pariah.

Alright insulting a red haired baby though. Fair game for some reason.

Imagine if you commented on a baby’s skin colour in a negative way.

It’s not the same. I hate when this line is trotted out.

I'm a fellow ginger. Have had the comments all my life too and, as I got older, especially the inexplicable fascination with the colour of,our pubes.

Red hair is gorgeous and as your child gets,older they will realise that lots and lots of women spend an absolutely fortune paying to have their hair dyed the same colour as they have got for free.

I’m so sorry you get nasty comments OP! FWIW plenty of people will be thinking how glorious your child’s hair is too.

I bet your child's hair is beautiful. We have loads of people with ginger hair in NI and still they get comments. It's not acceptable, but sadly it's inevitable. What the woman said did contain a kernel of truth, but she had absolutely no business saying it to you.

@Coolhwip why isn’t it the same?

It’s not the same. I hate when this line is trotted out

I kind of agree.....and not. My skin colour is very pale. I am so pale that apparently I look like a ghost or a dead body. I've been called a freak due to my very pale skin and red hair and when trying to buy some foundation once got told that my skin colour is so unnatural that I needed to self tan before even shopping for make up.

Is that acceptable?

Because your son will not be discriminated against when looking for a job.

Because he won’t be stopped and searched dozens of times.

Because he won’t be assumed to be a criminal or a terrorist.

Because people won’t campaign for him to be deported to where he came from based on his country of birth.

Don’t appropriate racism for him.

people will always try and find a way to feel superior to others.

it’s lazy - but bullies tend to be.

identifying a physical characteristic that is rare is an easy way to single people out.

red hair is rare. Ignore the comments. Some people are just a bit thick! Practice the superior, sympathise, it must be so difficult to be you look. Then turn away.

Seriously, get an education.

How is it not the same.

Hair colour and skin colour are genetically determined, not a choice of the individual, uncontrollable. It's part of who you are.

Another one who needs to read a book.

I have red hair. I occasionally got nasty comments as a child. But it hasn’t impacted my educational, life or health outcomes.

it’s not the same.

Well said.

I have read plenty of books and am not denying racism is a thing. The reason so many people think poking fun at redheads or bullying them is fair game is because of anti-Irish sentiment, and red hair is associated with being Irish.

Racism is not OK. Neither is bullying redheads.

She's not talking about eventualities though. She's talking about what her one year old child is experiencing in the here and now, and will possibly continue to experience throughout his childhood.

Ignore unkind comments red hair is gorgeous and rare.

If anyone is particularly nasty I would say;

" He can die his hair if he wants, but you are stuck with your face"

But she is equating this what people of colour experience. Which is wrong and minimises their experiences.

And anyway @Coolhwip, this is not a thread about Top Trumps about who is the most discriminated against. It's about whether the OP's "friends" have any right to comment negatively on an aspect of her child's appearance, and it's clearly not.

Look them in the eye and ask if they intended to be so rude