To leave toddler playing in the other room for a bit?

[Frogmarch89]

So 18 month old has a giant playpen full of toys. If somebody is in the room she will only play in it with somebody else, she won't play independently. However if there is nobody else in there she happily plays with her toys and talks to her Teddy bears and dolls.

So sometimes I put her in it, make a cuppa and go in the other room for 20 minutes or so. Both doors are open so I can hear her playing and it is safe in there.

I mentioned doing this to my friend and she says that its not normal to leave a child that young alone. I didn't really think anything of it, it's only now and again and gives me a chance to have a cuppa in peace.

AIBU?

I wouldn’t have left for 20 minutes, I would have left DC in playpen to nip to the loo or put on a wash or something where I’d be popping back quickly.
They were not happy to be left alone anyway so it was academic, as OP says mine wanted me to get in the playpen too.

Completely fine. I did this all the time with all of mine. Put them in the play pen in the living room so you can get a load of washing on in the kitchen... just make sure you check on them regularly and are never too far away. You do not have to stand staring at an 18 month old you know is in a safe environment, 24/7!! Your friend is being silly. And I bet she did something like that at some point and had just forgotten. If you didn't you'd literally never get anything in your home done.

Isn’t the point of the thread that she isn’t supervised and that’s why the OP is asking.

It’s not an issue at all
perfectmy fine
you don’t need a camera !

It’s fine. I’d do that as log as there’s nothing they could quietly choke on.
I live in a flat and I leave my 2 yo in the living room sometimes while I’m putting clothes away in the bedroom or sorting washing out. He can come to me cos he wouldn’t ever accept a playpen but I’m not 24/7 in the same room as him. Don’t have a camera in there

Totally fine. Curious about how other parents who insist a toddler cannot ever be alone get through the day really. Do you take them with you to the toilet? To make a cuppa? To answer the door? Clean the bathroom?

Omg I must be a terrible parent I let my 18mo twins play in another room WITHOUT a playpen 🤯 please dont call SS!!
They are usually in there with 5yo DD and are more than capable of toddling in and out of all the downstairs rooms safely. There are no hazards, I check on them at regular intervals, and always shout DD to make sure everything is ok.
Yours is in a playpen so absolutely safe and fine to be left alone happily playing. Sorry just my opinion but helicopter parenting is so toxic!!!
Enjoy a few minutes peace and quiet, it doesn't make you a bad parent.

I don’t see any problem at all. I did similar with my boy at that age. Obviously nothing in her way of any danger so if it works then why not. I remember going to microwave my cuppa and finding yesterday’s cold microwaved cuppa still in there when I opened the door!

I honestly thought everyone did this???

I’m amazed to hear your friend doesn’t think it’s ok.

My DD plays happily in her playpen while I do things around the house. I can hear her playing or chatting to herself and if it goes quiet I just check up on her. What you are doing is fine.

You sound like a crazy person.

Of course it's fine.

Some people really do love to play the martyr / make a rod for their own back, don't they? Playpen's were literally invented to create a safe space for children to play so mum could get on with other stuff. Assuming you're not filling it with marbles and spiky shit, your toddler will be fine.

Of course it's fine - we were all left alone for hours, including in a pram at the bottom of the garden! And children need time alone, just like everyone else - they need to get used to just their own company, and it encourages their imaginations to play alone.

it’s perfectly fine
leave a toddler to play with knifes unsupervised while you go to the pub would be frowned
but a baby proofed room, no way to escape, you can still hear them, no issues at all

Maybe pop in a monitor nearby if you have one so you can see what’s going on

Damn where's the edit button gone?

Ignore the erroneous apostrophe!

My 16 month totters around the house as she pleases whilst I do other bits! As did her brother and sister… How else do you make dinner?! Use the toilet?! Get literally anything done in the house?!

You can supervise from another room as long as you can see/hear them and the room is secure and safe.

I work in the dining room while my kids play in the living room (where the toys and tv are)... at the furthest point I'm like 5 meters away from them and I could tell you what they are doing even if I can't see them from the spot I'm in as I'm pretty much an expert at this point. Used a pen when they where very young but honestly by 18 month they are 'free range'. All of my kids have survived this perfectly fine.

Then again the people that think this is terrible might also be horrified that I don't take my kids to the toilet with me either.

Kind of funny that here theres this reaction on this thread and yet literally just hours ago I was called a 'helicopter parent' for saying I wouldn't ditch and run a 4 year old who just started reception at a birthday party on another thread.

None of my 2 year old could reply to questioning.

I make movers not talkers, advanced fine motor skills but if you want a conversation more stimulating than just 'Hiya' or 'oh, no' or 'ouch' then your shit out of luck lol (with my youngest 'ouch' doesn't even mean 'it hurts' it for some reason means 'no' lol).

Huh? So what happens if they are choking, limb stuck in cot bar or baby trying to climb out sort of thing? Only the parents see the video camera anyway.

How big is that soft play though? I am quite relaxed but most kids that age are a bit young to be unsupervised going up and down rope ladders etc. I would love to sit and have a coffee and let my one year old crack on but I wouldn't trust they wouldn't hit another child either.

I must be terrible. We don't have a playpen but we're also all on one level, so sometimes she's in the living room while I'm in a differe t room. I can see her from some rooms and hear her from all. Sometimes I have to make lunch and she doesn't want to come with me. Sometimes she's settled herself in with whatever she wants to do so I might hang some washing on the airer.

I don't know how these parents who have their DC attached to them constantly get anything done!

Totally fine! As long as all her toys are safe it won’t do her any harm and it’s good for them to play independently

I think that’s way too young and very lackadaisical parenting. I wouldn’t entertain that until 2/2.5.

Don't use a camera, your 18-month-old can't consent ??😂Sometimes I despair at the things you hear on Mumsnet.