Restaurant maître d' talking about us to other customers

[heynow1111]

Went out for a meal with husband to a nice restaurant and booking was 1.5 hours. I am a slow eater and we were having a lovely time chatting so I wasn't clock watching.

In retrospect Maître d'/head waiter was hovering when I was close to finishing and I should have perhaps read this as they were rushing us to finish but I was so enjoying the meal and company I didn't register at the time.

Finished meal and Maître d'/head waiter said (in other words can't remember exactly) "sorry I've been waiting for you to finish, I didn't know what to do". I know they said sorry but you know when from someone's tone they are NOT sorry and what they said was more to point out you had annoyed them? At the time I felt really awkward and embarrassed like I should have been tracking the time or something? So I apologised.

After this had happened husband said that PRIOR to this, he had seen Maître d' talking behind their hand whilst looking at us and saying sorry. So talking about us whilst we were at that point totally unaware we had gone over time.

I think this could have been better managed by when we were coming close to end of our booking, saying excuse me, just to let you know you are coming to the end of your booking as we have another table at X time? I would have thought oh sh** and rushed up!

I completely get it must be annoying when customers go over on bookings and it must be complex coordinating everything but i thought it was handled unprofessionally. Just tell us you need the table now/soon rather than talking about us behind our backs to other customers and then informing us after the fact that we had 'held up' a booking? AIBU?

The restaurant is obliged to apologise to the next customer, if their table is not ready for their reservation.

They were probably telling the next guest that the table wasn’t free and you were still eating.
Im surprised they weren’t glaring at you.

@heynow1111
The restaurant did say it clearly in the booking time. They were not making arrangements with a child. It was your responsibility to be mindful of the time. You and not them know that you are a slow eater, so that places the responsibility for being mindful of the time on you.

Hopefully, you added a bit extra to the tip to compensate for the inconvenience that you caused.

If you wanted a nice leisurely meal you shouldn’t have accepted a 90 minute booking.

The only time we have had a time limit like this is when we have booked into a very booked up restaurant, as long as the waiting staff are efficient 1.5 hours is very doable.

These responses surprise me - ‘you should be click watching’, ‘you should eat faster’. It sounds like an utterly joyless evening out.

And totally different to every restaurant visit I’ve had.

I seem to be in the vast minority though, so happy to have had my eyes opened to the world. I won’t be rushing out to experience it though.

@GCAcademic - sorry, I made a mistake in my post - I actually meant i've never been made aware of a time limit

Sorry - I meant I have NEVER been made aware of a time limit

"sorry I've been waiting for you to finish, I didn't know what to do"

That sounds to me like an APOLOGY for hovering. I understand that you were there and tone matters, but still: could he have actually mean what he said?

Clearly he would've been better to gently let you know your slot was coming to an end but, as he said, he didn't know what to do! I can imagine other customers may have given him an earful for reminding them of the time; maybe the poor bugger feels like he can't get it right for getting it wrong.

I bloody hate restaurant 'sittings'. That should be kept for canteens.

I hate restaurants that time you! If I’m going to a fancy place normally it would be for a celebration ( anniversary/ birthday that kind of thing) and I want nice wine, a few course and to talk to the people I’m with. 1.5 hours isn’t even enough for some chain restaurants of it’s a busy Saturday night for example.

You do know you’re a slow eater though so probably should have tried to book a longer slot or gone elsewhere.

🤣🤣🤣

Nearly all London restaurants have time limits now. Usually 2 hours for 2 but occasionally 1.5 (though I tend not to book them). I recently ate at Gavroche and that had a 2 hour time limit. At the dot of 2 hours, we were asked very politely if we would like to take our petite fours and coffee in the bar area instead.
Personally, I hate being reminded at the start or during a meal about the time limit so I would much prefer being told at the end like this.

A lot of places theoretically have a 1.5hr time slot but I've never known it to be enforced- if you're still buying meals/drinks they're usually happy.

I don’t understand this attitude. It’s not telling tales to report shite customer service, and that’s exactly what it was. If the service staff are incapable of doing a basic part of their job (speaking directly to a customer to remind them their time slot is coming to and end) they need retraining. This is why so many places have utterly wank service now as everyone is too scared to say something or think it’s some weird concept to say “I was unhappy with the service”.

Passive aggressive hovering and whispering / pointing about customers is not somewhere conductive to good service or a pleasant atmosphere. It doesn’t even have to be a “complaint” just feedback.

Thought you didn’t like passive aggression, hmm?

You come across as a bit entitled tbh. I imagine you’re the sort of person who doesn’t respect other peoples time.

Yes the situation could’ve been handled better but you don’t know what the staff are trained to do in those situations and you don’t know what they were saying to the other customers other than the script you and your DH have made up in your own heads 🤷‍♀️

It’s not hard to keep track of time - you did agree to the 1.5hrs upon booking so why are you having a little strop about it now?

I also hate restaurants where you only have say 1.5 hours. That's not a lot by the time you've thought about drinks, starters, mains, desserts, coffee etc. It's fine for somewhere like Nandos, but not in a decent restaurant.

However it does seem to be more and more common. I think it should be made clear at the time of booking that the table is only until X o clock, and then at least you can plan accordingly.

they have no idea what the staff member was saying they’re just assuming and making things up. Why would you risk someone getting in trouble at work for your own imagination?

It depends on the restaurant and the time of the booking. If you’re booked in for early evening and you’re told it’s a 90 minute slot then you know that they need the table again.

That's very rude, @SisterMichaelsHabit. I don't know what kind of restaurants you frequent, but there are plenty where diners can very easily spend 1.5 hours or more without eating unusually slowly. A place with a maitre d' isn't McDonald's, is it?

I went out for lunch last week and spent 1.5 hours, having starter, main and a coffee (no pudding). At no point did we have any sense that the staff were trying to hurry us along. If anything I'd have preferred them to push the pace a tiny bit more, but not to the point where I had any complaints.

He handled it very poorly.
If there was a set time for the booking and your table is slow, then in my experience they usually come over about 30min before to take your order for dessert/last drink and this is used as a reminder they need the table back soon.

And you complained the restaurant were passive aggressive!

If they’d told you you were running over your time slot and they needed the table you’d be on here complaining they were rude.

1.5hrs is a measly amount of time in a good restaurant! I wouldn’t have gone with that time limit personally.

Totally agree!

I had an aunt like you- she was still eating her soup when we had almost finished our main course. She was delightfully dotty & the most beautiful person, but my God did it drive us all up the wall for years waiting for her to finish a course so we could all move on (at home too), so decision was taken to politely eat all of our next course whilst she was gabbing/ eating like a snail. When out she eventually ordered just one course, which worked well.

I forsee this will be you when you're older. Is your food not freezing?