To contact the school on Monday about comments on social media

[crappycomments]

My eldest DD helped out at a sixth form open evening last week, where prospective sixth formers from the same and other schools were invited to attend a presentation from the headteacher and head of sixth form in the school hall, followed by circulation around the different subject areas to get a taste of what activities are on offer in sixth form lessons.
My DD along with about 25 others was a subject ambassador, in that she helped set up and then demonstrate some activities. She also additionally acted as a tour guide to help direct people around the school.
Either later the same evening or the following day, several photos of the event were posted on Facebook by the school, including some of the subject staff and also a selection of the students who helped out. My DD was one of the students pictured.
Over the last couple of days many people have commented on the event and the students, many being complimentary about the event and how helpful the students were. However there appears to be a number of negative comments appearing about my DD and her appearance in particular, which she is obviously upset about and I'm not sure how to go about stopping it.
Do I contact the school to ask them to remove the article/photos; I don't know how to stop the comments.

I emailed the school last night, I only had email addresses for the safeguarding person and the head's PA so I emailed both. Within an hour I had received a reply from the one of the school admin team apologising for the distress that the comments on the Facebook page had caused, and that the commenting feature had been disabled and negative comments removed. They also said that someone from senior leadership would contact me on Monday to discuss the issue.
I feel better that at least something has been done but obviously my daughter is still pretty upset by it, and is blaming herself for attracting these comments, and still thinking that I will be annoyed with her.
To answer some of the previous posters questions, the comments appeared to be from adults, as I said none of her friends uses Facebook. She only became aware of it from one of her friends whose mother had seen it.
I reply to the comments/criticisms from other posters about how she wears her uniform, I don't tend to worry too much about how my children look for school in that they know what the expectations of their primary/secondary schools are, and they know that I will always back the school if they transgress their behaviour/uniform policies. Additionally I am often already at work by the time they leave the house for school so it's up to them to sort themselves out.

I’m glad the school is on it.

https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/parents_of_adult_children/4925531-my-daughters-15-minutes-of-fame-devastated?page=1

This thread talks about a lot of the abuse women (and girls) face online just for being female. It’s grim that it is so common but maybe reading some of it would help your daughter to see that it’s nothing she’s done that’s caused this.

I feel better that at least something has been done but obviously my daughter is still pretty upset by it, and is blaming herself for attracting these comments, and still thinking that I will be annoyed with her.

Please wholeheartedly explain to your daughter she is in no way responsible for these odious, pathetic comments.

She should in no way take on responsibility for the social misfits who would do something like this.

I'm pretty sure you would be doing that though. You sound like a sensible person.

Good luck to your DD with sixth form. She sounds great and very involved.

LOL. Boys wearing their trousers pulled down isn't the same because no older female finds the sight of teenage boys' underwear erotic! Quite the opposite.

DD insists on wearing her school skirt short because "everyone does" but has also told me she feels awkward and exposed wearing it so short. I back up the school on the rare occasions they try to enforce the uniform rules, but the rest of the time I encourage her to do what she's comfortable with and leave the choice to her. I rolled my skirt up at school (and personally I enjoyed the attention that got me) but wore my uniform according to regulations when representing the school at open evening - nothing else was permitted.

It's not the worst thing for young girls to be discouraged from exposing their bodies in situations where that's inappropriate and it's good for 6th formers to have opportunities to practise behaving "professionally". Were the school's female teachers also wearing skirts rolled up to show off as much of their legs as possible? I doubt it.

Why does the fact that older women aren't attracted to it make it better? Why are TEENAGE GIRLS in the wrong because of old pervy men? She's not being discouraged, she's being called horrible, misogynistic names. The victim blaming on this thread is astounding.

If older males - Men, find the site of a 16 year old girls legs erotic, then he's a dirty, perving sex pest. It's not up to girls to control these men and their illegal desires. They are just legs. Female athletes wear short shorts. Should they stop too, incase a man can't control himself? Grown women wear mini skirts and hot pants. Is the problem just because they are school girls, so it's not fair on men?
We shouldn't be making young girls feel self conscious about their legs. My 10 year old still spends all spring and summer in shorts, not long shorts, just shorts. At what age do I have to tell her, she needs to wear knee length things otherwise old pervs will be after her? I've raised my son to be better than that. That's the answer, to raise better men. Not to make girls afraid.

I drove through town on Friday as the local Secondary school was kicking out. I'd say that a very high proportion of the girls had skirts which were much shorter than I feel sure that their uniform policy specifies. My teenage NDN - who goes to a different secondary school wears similarly short skirt and I know for a fact that their uniform policy dictates knee length skirts as my DC went there. I'm surprised anyone bats an eyelid about it these days (unless it's one of those headline seeking schools who sends 100 kids home in a day for uniform breaches) let alone have the energy to comment on it on Social media.
Glad that your DDs school have taken action now and hopefully they will identify those involved and send them a strongly worded letter.

I am glad to read the school's response.

If it is found to be a parent or parents, perhaps the school should act. Not sure police are the right way to go though.

I would hope that the school wouldn't allow boys or girls to wear their uniform with their arses hanging out, especially at an event where the school is trying to make a good impression to prospective parents. Those complaining of misogyny are missing the point. It's not OK to post nasty comments on Facebook but there is a lesson to be learned here for the school and its students.

You’re a twat

If the school was that bothered, I don't think they would've posted the photos in the first place. Also not sure how it's relevant if other students were commented on or not.

What happened to "it doesn't matter as much for boys?"

Sounds like the school need to monitor their Facebook page more closely if so many abusive comments were allowed to stand for so long without them noticing anything awry.

Did your D sign a form to say she didn't mind her pic appearing?

Don't agree to it in the future?
Why does everything have to be filmed and put on Facebook today anyway?

Of all the girls I've heard or seen comments about over the length of their skirts, none of their arses have been 'hanging out.' From the OP it sounds like it was a photo from the front anyway, so how would anybody see her arse?
Again, it's just so cringe to talk about girls 'arses hanging out' People just need to stop commenting on girls bodies!

To answer some of the previous posters questions, the comments appeared to be from adults,

these must have been parents of the attendees??

Are you also a type of person who says the victims of rape asked for it if they wore a short skirt?

It's the society's problem that people see short skirts as problematic, not the girls who wear them. Short skirt or undone button should nto eb an excuse to abuse anyone, especially a teenager!

Parents sign this agreement when kids join school, so unless OP stated however many years ago she didnt want the photos of her child on website/SM etc, nor opted out, school has a right to do it. School would nto be asking parents to sign another form throughout the course of the years.

Facebook won't care, there's nasty comments everywhere on Facebook.

Speak to the school, they can disable comments. And maybe state you don't give any further permission for your child to be used in the pictures.

That's the answer, to raise better men. Not to make girls afraid.

This, a thousand times over.

*I would hope that the school wouldn't allow boys or girls to wear their uniform with their arses hanging out, especially at an event where the school is trying to make a good impression to prospective parents. Those complaining of misogyny are missing the point. It's not OK to post nasty comments on Facebook but there is a lesson to be learned here for the school and its students.
*

It's 100% social misfit to post comments on something like this. Like inappropriate, busy body, nasty person.

The schools policy on dress code in all this is so insignificant as to be laughable. The school posted the actual picture so talking about "lesson learned" is eye rolling.

I suppose the takeaway is don't leave the comments on.
@Jibo

Maybe the school was not bothered because they know what is important and fact students stayed behind and volunteered their free time was more important to them than the length of a skirt

It's not the worst thing for young girls to be discouraged from exposing their bodies in situations where that's inappropriate and it's good for 6th formers to have opportunities to practise behaving "professionally". Were the school's female teachers also wearing skirts rolled up to show off as much of their legs as possible? I doubt it.

Who cares what the teachers were wearing?
So irrelevant.

The school didn't care what this 6th former was wearing whilst she helped and organised. And they didn't care when they posted the picture.

This is not a thread about standards of dress in school, it's a thread about socially inept misfits posting public comments about a young girl calling her a slapper and a slut.

That's the problem here.
Not the uniform.