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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To contact the school on Monday about comments on social media

163 replies

crappycomments · 11/11/2023 17:04

My eldest DD helped out at a sixth form open evening last week, where prospective sixth formers from the same and other schools were invited to attend a presentation from the headteacher and head of sixth form in the school hall, followed by circulation around the different subject areas to get a taste of what activities are on offer in sixth form lessons.
My DD along with about 25 others was a subject ambassador, in that she helped set up and then demonstrate some activities. She also additionally acted as a tour guide to help direct people around the school.
Either later the same evening or the following day, several photos of the event were posted on Facebook by the school, including some of the subject staff and also a selection of the students who helped out. My DD was one of the students pictured.
Over the last couple of days many people have commented on the event and the students, many being complimentary about the event and how helpful the students were. However there appears to be a number of negative comments appearing about my DD and her appearance in particular, which she is obviously upset about and I'm not sure how to go about stopping it.
Do I contact the school to ask them to remove the article/photos; I don't know how to stop the comments.

OP posts:
spurs4ever · 11/11/2023 17:07

The school will hopefully be monitoring but YANBU to ask them to remove photos and comments about your DD. People can be so horrible, I hope she's ok x

NeedToChangeName · 11/11/2023 17:08

Yes I would ask school to take down photos that include your DD

ChickpeaPie · 11/11/2023 17:09

Can you report them to Facebook? I’m sure there’s an option to report as hate speech or abuse.
Can I ask what nature are the comments?

DelphiniumBlue · 11/11/2023 17:09

Don't wait till Monday, email the Head now and ask them to take the photos down. The Heads I know do see and sometimes act on emails recieved over the weekend.

EvilElsa · 11/11/2023 17:09

Poor DD. Definitely contact the school and get the posts/comments removed. Can you report the comments now via social media?

VickyEadieofThigh · 11/11/2023 17:14

Never ceases to amaze me how many utter twats there are in this world.

Definitely ask for these to be removed with urgency.

hopeishere · 11/11/2023 17:16

Can you message the school via the Facebook or insta account

Afteropening · 11/11/2023 17:18

untag her

and I would personally comment now )because unlikely anything am be done about it until Monday re the school)

“I am X’s mother. What you are saying is hurtful and offensive. Stop. “

Sunnylove22 · 11/11/2023 17:19

Not many heads will actually run their school social media. That will be done by somebody else that works Mon-Fri.

I am sure that when you alert school they will remove the comments. A conscientious school may also message those that have written comments too to address them.

There are some nasty people around I’m sorry this has happened.

EvilElsa · 11/11/2023 17:20

Are these comments from fellow students/students to be? I'd definitely be screenshotting the comments/names so the college can investigate this bullying. I'd assume they have an anti bullying policy. Hopefully if you report now it will get removed ASAP. Spiteful shits.

CeilingWacks · 11/11/2023 17:21

This raises some very pertinent questions about using children on social media. My personal opinion is that schools are failing in their duty to safeguard if they post pictures without having the capacity to monitor the account carefully.

crappycomments · 11/11/2023 17:21

ChickpeaPie · 11/11/2023 17:09

Can you report them to Facebook? I’m sure there’s an option to report as hate speech or abuse.
Can I ask what nature are the comments?

I'll email the school this evening. It's to do with how she's wearing her uniform, which is a bit shit because she's not the only one like it.
I'm no expert on Facebook, this is as social media as I get!

OP posts:
Afteropening · 11/11/2023 17:22

Your daughter should be able to advise you op

or does she not know?

crappycomments · 11/11/2023 17:22

Afteropening · 11/11/2023 17:18

untag her

and I would personally comment now )because unlikely anything am be done about it until Monday re the school)

“I am X’s mother. What you are saying is hurtful and offensive. Stop. “

How do I untag her? She's just pictured along with other students.

OP posts:
Afteropening · 11/11/2023 17:25

Does your daughter not know?

Afteropening · 11/11/2023 17:25

So they haven’t tagged her ie named her?

Wouldyouguess · 11/11/2023 17:29

What do you mean 'tagged' - did they include her name in the description? Tag her personal account (would be super bizarre for a school to do)? If the latter she can ''untag' herself, but if it is her name in the description they have to manually edit the description.

crumblingschools · 11/11/2023 17:30

Schools won't have tagged her (shouldn't link to student's social media).

Some of our local schools deactivate the comments facility on their Facebook pages due to bullying arseholes and disgruntled parents

VickyEadieofThigh · 11/11/2023 17:31

EvilElsa · 11/11/2023 17:20

Are these comments from fellow students/students to be? I'd definitely be screenshotting the comments/names so the college can investigate this bullying. I'd assume they have an anti bullying policy. Hopefully if you report now it will get removed ASAP. Spiteful shits.

EXCELLENT advice.

crumblingschools · 11/11/2023 17:31

Schools very rarely put full name of students on articles any more

PatioSkirt · 11/11/2023 17:32

I would email the school too - don't use the admin email - email the head of sixth form and the safeguarding lead directly. If it is anything like my school someone will pick it up very soon and deal with it.

crappycomments · 11/11/2023 17:35

Afteropening · 11/11/2023 17:25

So they haven’t tagged her ie named her?

Oh I see. Yes her Christian name is used.

OP posts:
SM4713 · 11/11/2023 17:35

Is she the only one being targeted, or have others have negative comments made? Are they other students, parents or someone else making the comments? Was she actually wearing the wrong uniform/incorrectly or are they just making that up?

Afteropening · 11/11/2023 17:36

crappycomments · 11/11/2023 17:35

Oh I see. Yes her Christian name is used.

Ok so not tagged (meaning will show up on her feed)

I am guessing your daughter is unaware hence you asking us?

Jibo · 11/11/2023 17:37

Whoever posted the photos on behalf of the school will be able to delete any unpleasant comments and limit future commenting. Call the school office on Monday.