Did guests bring you precooked meals when you had a newborn?

[Redcargidan]

Not an AIBU but a question. We have a newborn baby. Multiple people have asked me if our friends/family/visitors have brought things like precooked meals in tupperware (that can just be put in the microwave) when they visit, that sort of thing.
Nobody has done this and nobody did when our eldest was a newborn. In truth, nothing would be more appreciated right now than a meal I did not have to cook. Is this a thing? Do other people generally do this, or are the people that have said it just expectant?

I am fighting the urge to spend a fortune on takeaways because we are way too tired to cook, and am VERY jealous if other people generally receive precooked meals from visitors!
YABU - this isn't really a done thing
YANBU - this is a thing

The temptation to ask people to bring these instead of clothes that will only fit baby for 1 week when they come round! (Joking but wish I had the balls to do this )

My lovely neighbour, whom I didn’t know very well at all, used to leave me a Tupperware of home made soup every day. Her reasoning was that you can heat it up and eat it quickly, it was hot and nourishing and comforting. She also used to leave a good sized slice of cake from time to time as well.

Other guests used to say to me “We’ll come for lunch” and I was expected to cook and entertain while they cooed over the baby.

@ScrambledSmegs - this is what love looks like

Sadly nope.

I know in some church communities (possibly mosques and synagogues as well) then a meal train is a thing when a new mum has a baby, with meals dropped off each night for the first week or two. So for those groups I guess it’s a norm, but not necessarily for the broader population.

Want to add that I doubt uts often expected and most of the time people are capable of throwing something together themselves.
However, it is a really kind thing to do, even just bringing snacks that can be eaten one handed while feeding a baby for example.
I'd like to think I want to extend kindness to my loved ones especially in a time where they may be feeling vulnerable, as it was to me.

Nobody didn’t with my first, but with my second a lovely friend did. It was so so appreciated and she went all out - she delivered freshly made dinners for a week or 2 including pudding! It wasn’t expected and I tried to say no several times as she has 2 kids of her own but she did it anyway!

@Lndnmummy - love hearing about your MIL. Sounds she would have raised a very kind boy.

Yes but both our kids were in NICU for a month each. It was hugely appreciated - meals cooked
by friends, cook meals, takeaways delivered to hospital, hospital coffee shop vouchers.

I don't expect it would have been as much of a thing if they'd been healthy. I have given JustEat vouchers to friends when they've had theirs.

This is the norm in my friendship circle- I have dropped meals off for others and have received meals myself. We were extremely lucky with our first- we were given enough meals to last 2 weeks and when those ran out, the same people came and stocked up our kitchen again! We didn’t have to cook for a month, but had lovely healthy meals ready to reheat each day.

Yes DH could have whipped up some pasta or egg and sausages as a PP has suggested, but much nicer and healthier to have proper meals to heat up, we really appreciated this.

One of my friends also turned up with a present for newborn in one hand and a cleaning caddy in the other- I cried when I saw her!

Forever grateful to everyone who helped us during that time.

We lived away from family and had just moved to a new town (military) when we had our first baby, so we didn’t have regular meals dropped off. My mum came to visit several times in the first few weeks/months and always bought some kind of casserole/lasagne/pie for us to eat while she was with us and then we got to keep the leftovers for the next day or two, which was always welcome. Dhs parents would come and want to get a takeaway, when actually, it would have been much better for them to bring a dinner and leave us to get the takeaway when we were knackered (they were the kind to sit and hold the baby while we bought them cups of tea all day).

When dbro and sil had their babies I sent meals for them, to ease their load a bit. I think it’s far more useful to send food than sending another pack of babygrows.

Yes. But this was through the Church I attend, a home cooked meal was delivered every day for 14 days. It was amazing. Massive amounts too, I froze extra portions and it all lasted an extra 2 weeks.

We still do it now, just last week I made a beef stew (enough for four people) and dropped it off.

My mum came to stay and kept us fed. I still dream of the cup of tea and slice of orange cake she'd bring me whilst I was breastfeeding. It was like nectar 😌

My best friend did this for us. And one fiend brought cake. No one else offered food. No one else brought biscuits or cake! We had to stock up on biscuits and cake for all the visitors and when my parents came they asked for tea and coffee refills… which I had to get up and make!

My DP is American and we have friends who, when they’ve had babies, have posted links to their meal train pages - with schedules to sign up, dietary preferences, and links to gift cards for delivery services as well. I’ve always thought that in the time it takes to set that up they could probably do a Cook order instead 😏

I’ve got a newborn at the moment as well (our second) and one friend did bring me lunch one day, but other than that no pre-cooked meals. Don’t remember getting any with DC1 either. Lots of visitors with generous gifts though so really can’t complain. And luckily our baby is sleeping very well so I haven’t struggled much to cook food etc.

I have done something similar for a few friend with newborns, didn't cook but went over with bags of groceries which included stuff like milk, bread, cooked chicken, salad and some ready meals. It was always really appreciated, in fact one friend said she had just been saying to her partner that she wished someone would go to the shops for them and then like magic, I appeared with !

I have a MIL just like yours, we are very blessed.

NRTFT but my kids are nine and yes a friend filled my freezer for me when they came home from hospital. I was so overwhelmingly grateful that I have paid it forward for every good friend who’s had a baby since. It’s the best present ever.

MIL brought a homemade lasagne which DH and I thought was a nice gesture until it transpired that MIL, FIL and SIL were planning to partake of it too that same evening, having already spent the entire day in our house. Nothing enviable about that situation 😂

I don't remember anyone bringing me food, but I had filled the freezer to bursting point with batch cooked meals anyway. I was lucky, and was fairly mobile after my first.

I'm making a mental note to do this for my own friends and children, though.

My aunt did drop off a huge homemade lasagne after i had my second. It much appreciated!

I didn't really need it with my first. Baby pretty much slept all the time for the first 3 months.

A friend who's a great cook did this. Lots of meals we could freeze and then eat with just a fork if holding the baby. It helped that she was way ahead of the friendship group in having kids, so knew exactly what was needed. Best newborn gift ever.

I do deliveroo/Uber eats vouchers and some M&S vouchers for either posh ready meals, salads or baby clothes.
I would cook but I never know what to make so I just give vouchers and pop round with some cake and make tea.

Yes, my parents did bring meals for us but I think it happened organically rather than by design.

When DD1 was born they called before they visited and asked if there was anything we needed. I said we hadn't had time to go to the shops so if they could pick up some essentials that would be great and they came with two or three bags full of shopping bless them.

I told them how brilliant it was and what a huge help it had been....when DD2 was born they went a bit OTT and absolutely filled our freezer 🤣. Bless them, it was so helpful.

No and I wouldn’t have wanted them to, even with a newborn I didn’t mind a bit of cooking as it was a bit of normality / a break from the baby. DH was on paternity leave too. Fortunately no one did it.