To get involved with niece in uni

[Grealish]

Was in my nieces uni town this weekend for work. Met up with her in the evening, took her out for dinner, and we went back to her flat afterwards. Her cupboards were EMPTY. She had a bag of pasta & a jar of pesto and no other food to her name. Asked her why and she eventually admitted she had no money to buy anything else. We had a big chat and she said she’s been struggling to find a job (she’s doing a really intense course, is in uni 9-7 each day) and shes scared to ask her mum for more money and has been eating a meal a day for the past couple of weeks. In Ireland so students don’t automatically get loans.

Oh my god when I say my heart broke seeing her crying over being hungry. I know all uni students are broke but the thought of my little niece hahahaha aw stop I was in bits on the way home. Went to Tesco to get her some food and left her a €50 note when I was leaving.

I rang her mum (my sister) when I got home and told her about it and she was very much of the attitude well she better get a job then because she pays her rent. I explained that she’s trying to and that her daughter is going hungry. I wouldn’t mind but my sis and her husband have good paying jobs (not rich but not stuck for cash by any means) and she’s their only daughter.

What would you do in this scenario. It’s really not my place to do anything but my hearts broke thinking about my little niece making her pesto pasta every day.

TBH I couldn'tve worked and done my degree, at least, maybe only in the summer. The rest of the time there are always assignments etc to do.

I did well in the end but found it hard.

I made sure we allowed for extra funds for basics - so 220 pm in London so travel allowed for as well.

Its been a steep learning curve and she admits she has basically gone veggie as she can't afford meat.

Going out is the local student bar from Uni or once a month club night. Honestly if you have children please save a regular amount for when they are 18 - to go towards Uni or deposits on flats when they move out & furniture etc. Its really expensive out there at the moment and little sympathy or help.

I think it's nice that you want to help and I'd do the same if one of my nieces was in a similar situation.
That said, there are lots and lots of part time jobs in Dublin at the moment so if you really want to help her then I'd focus on helping her get a job as it's more in keeping with how your sister's family want your niece to operate. So encourage her to look a bit harder, help her get her CV printed, think if you know anyone in catering/retail or whatever.

If you can afford it, I would totally do her a "big" shop once a month - it's only until what, June or July this year?

She's in the most intense period for studying, she's had jobs before, she's working intense hours, not some lazy bum.

I'd want to make sure she had some good nutrition in her to power her brain for this final sprint - frozen and tinned veg, as well as protein, and some basic stuff to tie it all together like jars of sauces, olive oil, butter, and basic dried herbs and spices. Coffee/tea/milk, because living without those is rotten.

Did you miss the bit about how her course is extremely intense? She's in college 9-7 and then will have assignments, study etc. Most jobs require reasonable availability, which she will not have.

Did you all miss the fact this thread is from last year?!

Oops. It came up in Active for me.