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AIBU?

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Original poster

To ask what should happen now? DD attacked by other students

433 replies

RainInNovember · 06/11/2023 12:31

DD is 15, shes had a few issues with people, got into a few arguments, nothing major and mainly over whatsapp etc, she does seem to get involved in the drama. But a lot of her friends are similar and there are often fallings out but then friends again the next week.

I just had a message from dd at school. she said two girls who she used to be friends with have waited outside her lesson for her and followed her. once she was on her own they put a coat over her head and started punching her in the head and pulling her hair and dragging her about.

she has told school and she said the girls are currently in isolation, I have called school who said they're investigating now and will call me back shortly.

I have never dealt with anything like this before. I just want to know what to expect and how seriously they should take it.

OP posts:
Aurasauras · 10/11/2023 12:27

2023aaa · 09/11/2023 12:11

FFS, I’m so sorry this is happening.

This is exactly what I and several other posters meant when we said the punishment given by the school won’t have any impact on them.
People like this literally don’t care if they’re ’put in isolation’.
Not a single fuck given because it doesn’t change their life in any way, shape or form. It’s not a consequence. It’s the equivalent of a doss lesson.

I agree with taking your safeguarding concerns to absolutely everyone you can - LA, Ofsted, you name it.

Oh, and don’t forget the power of a good old Google review! Schools don’t like when their reputation is threatened.

Tabloids always a great option too - they’ll bite your hand off for a story like that because it generates outrage and therefore engagement.
Yes they’re rags, but you can just see the headlines of ‘Child violently assaulted but local school looked the other way’ going viral. The child usually stays anonymous in those articles, so absolutely go ahead and name and shame the school!

School will soon realise they’re got getting out of this with their image intact.

If the students know they are allowed to misbehave3 or4 times without serious punishment, they have a free pass to attack three times. They do not see it the same way as teachers!

WhatWhereWho · 10/11/2023 13:24

RainInNovember · 09/11/2023 13:43

The screenshots that were sent were homophobic, racist and taking the piss out of a disabled relative, as well as body shaming and bullying multiple girls. I just thought school should get a more rounded view of what these girls are like. One of them (not the original but one that shoved dd) is a senior perfect and is now having that title removed

Am glad you seem to be making some headway. Unfortunately that's often the case that parents have to make an issue out of things to get a good enough response, keep up the pressure on them and don't be put off escalating it further if need be.

I hope that your daughter is ok.

Original poster
RainInNovember · 10/11/2023 13:43

Thank you. We've not had any issues the past two days. Mocks are next week so I'm hoping it stays that way

OP posts:
WhatWhereWho · 10/11/2023 13:55

I wonder what the school is doing with regards to the bullying of other kids. You mentioned that it's part of a bigger issue. Good luck with it all, my niece is in the midst of her mocks too at the moment.

wishingiwas20something · 10/11/2023 13:56

RainInNovember · 06/11/2023 19:57

just had a acall from the police . it sounded like their hands are tied really but she said to tell school that i wanted positive action taking and that i will escate to the education authority. she sounded sympathetic but like they wont take it further

The point is surely that the school will relay to the bully (who intends to study law) that if the police were to be involved that may permanently alter the course of her life? That the bully is accountable for her decisions and ultimately is operating within the framework of UK law (as are the school, as are we all), and assault of another human being is a criminal charge. Your poor DD OP.

anyolddinosaur · 11/11/2023 12:17

Have you gone back to the police asked them to record that their were further assaults? I would do this and maybe also tell them you also have evidence of racist and homophobic comments from these girls. If, god forbid, there is another assault you want the police to take action.

Well done for making the school take this more seriously. Keep putting in writing everything that was agreed. You can also express thanks for the support for your daughter, if it deserves that.

Longma · 12/11/2023 17:43

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn by MNHQ for breaking our Talk Guidelines. at the request of it's author.

AproposofEverything · 22/11/2023 05:14

I hope your daughter is ok @RainInNovember

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