Aibu to not help Scouts…

[SecretsOfSunshine]

Name changed as identifiable.

Ive caused a bit of fall out, and didn’t expect it. I’m a bit of an accidental scout leader, not the main Akela but there weekly. My children went through scouts, the youngest is aging out. I’ve always been happy enough to help, I like kids. It’s not however something I’m hugely attached to either. I stayed mainly as they were short of leaders, and I enjoy it enough when there.

A parent complained that at camp they are feeding and housing the adults, we don’t pay to attend camps and we do eat.

Group section leader agreed, apparently other local packs do charge leaders for food over the weekend.

I didn’t get funny or stroppy, but I did say I’m out for camps. I said I don’t mind giving up my time, but it was a line for me to give up my weekend and pay for the pleasure. If I ate at home (large family) my food costs no where near the cost as the difference between cooking 5/6 portions is absorbed in the weekly food bill the same. Plus the scouts tend to overbuy and spend a lot more than is really needed tbh.

Another leader has now contacted me to say how strongly they disagree with me, also that I’m jeopardising the camp as they are already short on leaders. GSL has implied if I’m not committed maybe I should leave. Parents are moaning apparently.

The more I think the more pissed off I am. Tbh I’m ready to leave anyone between the increase in behaviour issues and local politics in the district. Camps have a horrible side of severe sleep deprivation and I also sometimes lose work shifts going or family commitments.

Is it really normal to begrudge volunteers their food and board in exchange for a weekend away for £50 and amazing activities laid on? I know when I was a teacher we were also included in costs spread among the kids. With 30/40 kids it’s hardly the bulk of the bill either

The cheek of some parents just astounds me! If you are giving up your weekend to give their little darlings a brilliant weekend then the least they can do is shout you a bit of dinner.

No way would they get a few days camp for £50 anywhere else! PGL for two nights would be triple that!

As a parent of a son in scouts and daughter in rainbows 🌈 I am deeply appreciative of the efforts the leaders go to by arranging a activity’s and giving up their feee time.
I thinks it’s only fair your costs are covered as you are volunteering your time and energy for the kids enjoyment.
I have also been happy to cover costs as I am sure most parents are and always send a Christmas gift too - thank you to all the scout leaders ❤️

My dd attends a week long camp for her hobby and I help out, if they didn't feed me there's no way I'd give up my weekend and sleep. By the time Sunday evening comes I'm knackered after 2 nights with no sleep and working in a kitchen all weekend. I think if a parent said something to me along the lines of what's been said to the op I'd walk out and never offer to help again.

I also volunteer at the rally's, sometimes I'm the car park attendant, other times I'm on the bbq, but it never ceases to amaze me that the people who moan and have strong opinions on the matter are the ones that will never volunteer to help.

Least unreasonable thing I have ever read! The parents who complained should volunteer if they care so much. People are so entitled it beggars belief. They expect these organisations to keep running, at minimal cost, but would rather die than muck in and help themselves. YANBU

My last Brownie Camp was the one where, having waited an extra two hours for him to grace us with his presence, a whole 1.3 miles from their home address), a father spotted the jar of coffee in my bag and asked whether he'd paid for that.

No, Nigel, you fucking didn't and, more's the point, even if you had, I bloody well deserved free coffee after 48 hours with your daughter and her best mate.

Scouting really is a thankless task.

My son has been through the ranks and went to the jamboree this year. I have nothing but admiration and respect for leaders, giving up their time to take a load of kids away for the weekend!

The cheek of some parents, don't you dare feel bad about your decision!

Thanks for all you've done, you'll be rewarded in heaven 😃

Wow, that's crazy - now I think about it, I wouldn't expect the adult volunteers Finlay anything for these kinds of things. It's a huge deal to give up your time, without having to pay for it as well.

• to pay

Fuck them off OP. Entitled, cheeky bastards, probably rearing equally entitled, cheeky bastards. They are not deserving of your time and commitment.

I'd love to say I can't believe this, but my DH is a scout leader, and we've heard this all before. The ingratitude is soul destroying, and worse is the parents who carp and criticise but never contribute to the group in a meaningful way. Let's face it, though, this is not really about the money, it's about the lack of acknowledgement of what it takes.
All I'll say is be careful not to alienate yourself. How small is your community? Are you going to be singled out for the inevitable vitriol? Maybe you can shrug that off (I've learned I find that difficult and need a quieter way of achieving the end goal). While I would want to put two fingers in the air, i think if the camp is already organised I'd see it through and then I'd leave. If you leave before the camp, you'll be that tight git who let everyone down. You don't have the backing of your co-leaders. (I'm gobsmacked another leader would question your commitment). As other folks say, other groups will be delighted to have you if you want to keep scouting (please do! You are worth your weight in gold for what you do). Good luck with your decision.

I would advise that if you resign, do it by email and copy in the District Commissioner, and maybe even County as well. Just so they know what the parents and your GSL is asking of the leaders.

Volunteering your free time should not have a negative financial impact on you financially. The leader who agrees with the parents wanting you to pay is unreasonable. She’s in for a rude awakening when she has parents expecting these trips but has no help at camps.

Tell them to go dib dib off! When my daughter goes on camps with the guides, the leaders costs are absorbed by the parents. No way you should be expected to give up your time AND money. Cheeky neckers! (Sorry, couldn't resist the puns!)

Not a chance I'd be giving my time for free to such nasty fkrs kids.
I know exactly how hard camps are, I went on many youth residentials as a youth worker. I was well paid for my time too.
Do not go back. Let the whinging parents take your place and discover how hard the work actually is.
I'm angry on your behalf.
Enjoy your new found free time.

As a scout leader I give up so much of my time, not only the weekly sessions but the planning, form filling, training requirements, admin…at camp you’re tasked with keeping 25 kids safe, entertained, fed and manage any wobbles. You’re first up (at sunrise) and last to bed (once the last scout has stopped messing around in their tent). Usually we eat any leftover scraps, it’s hardly gourmet food. I am self employed so give up a week’s wages for camp. My fellow leaders use their holiday (some get an extra day or two for volunteering).

Scouts is such a cheap activity, the camps are incredibly affordable, it’s not like the parents are selling a kidney to pay for it. I do it because it gives me great satisfaction to give the scouts these incredible experiences that are not available anywhere else. If a group of parents in my group had the audacity to suggest I should pay for my accommodation (a TENT) and board I would walk out straight away.

This should not have been introduced for a camp that was already arranged, but for the volunteers to be made aware there would be a charge moving forward (if that was necessary based on the wailing and lamenting of one parent).
Would have been easier for the leaders to respond by supporting you in giving up your time than give in, the parent doesn't have to send their child if they don't like it.
Hopefully the parent who complained will be right there stepping up to fill your place, happily paying for the 'privilege.'

I made the mistake of mentioning this thread to my scout leader dp. He has finally gone to bed after an evening of very uncharacteristic ranting about bloody parents have no bloody idea and if they want to come to bloody camp they bloody can and see what it's like making sure that 20 bloody teenagers have a bloody wonderful safe time and see whether they would bloody pay good money for using their bloody holiday time....You get the picture.

I am also a scout parent - thank you for the hard work you do. I know it is often thankless, and that camps are exhausting. No adult I know would pay for that kind of experience!

Our scouts are going to jamboree soon, and we are currently fundraising to cover the costs for their leaders. I know in the past they paid for themselves, about 750 quid each! It will mean taking time off/organising leave in the peak holiday season (we're in NZ) and a high octane week. I'm sure it'll be fun but again, not something most adults would choose to spend their hard-earned cash on.

They are nuts. You are volunteering and looking after their kids all weekend, including nights! Work out the fees for that per hour and they begrudge you a bit of sausage n beans. Stuff that. Leave.

As a scout parent no way would I expect leaders to pay for their own food or accommodation at camp! Assuming you are eating the same as the kids not ordering Michelin starred deliveries for the leaders 😂

I would be done with it all after that.

YANBU and thank you for the hours and hours of your time that you have contributed!

Another one here. Any Leaders/GSL expecting you to pay are not reading the guidelines, plus all the rules of volunteering - it shouldn't cost you to volunteer..... Camp is VERY hard work.

It really is heart warming to see all the wonderful support on this thread.

I wish the balance were more like this in my real life experience.

Thanks everyone, I might save this thread and read it again when I am fed up.

Agree - note none of the complainant type parents emerge on threads like these to explain themselves. Usually on longer threads you get at least a few trying to justify the opposing view but not here. Who on earth are they?