School dinners v packed lunch

[F05ters1]

Reception age daughter begging to go on packed lunches already after 6 weeks of full time school.

Every day without fail when I ask her what was for lunch I get... fishfingers chips and beans, I didn't like the chips and I'm off beans so I ate the fish fingers. Please can I take a packed lunch?

pasta and cheese, I didn't like the cheese and the pasta was soggy so I just had the biscuit for pudding. when can I go on packed lunch?

mince and dumplings today, mince was too salty and the dumpling was soggy, please can I go on packed lunches?

blah blah takes a packed lunch. (dd has even approached said mum who said her dd was a picky eater 🙄)

why can't you just say I'm a picky eater mum!

For context she'll eat a salmon fillet at home but won't eat a fishfinger.
She'll eat fillet steak but not a burger.
She eats all veg and salad but isn't keen on meat. I make soup packed with lentils and do lots of eggy things for protein

I'm torn. school meals are free and I work shifts, it's been a godsend not having to worry about lunch for the four year old restaurant critic! but she is so adamant, should I relent?

My daughter tried school dinners for a bit, she was starving when she came out of school (beyond the normal after school snack hunger).
One day she told me she had ice cream for lunch. That was it. Just ice cream.
She's been packed lunches ever since and prefers it that way. I didn't even bother trying with my son as he's such a fussy eater it would never have worked.

No it’s exactly the same in the school I work in (I’m in Scotland) Strict guidelines are followed as to what can and can’t be made, how much salt, sugar etc is in each meal, how much veg, fruit etc must be served. The largest percentage of the school meals our kiddies get are really good.

I made my kid have school meals and theb I started working in his school and saw the school meals and was horrified. Worst dinners I've ever seen. Tiny portions and often children will pick pasta, which is just cooked pasta then if they choose they can have the sauce poured over it. Doesn't look good and personally I think this is a bad way to have pasta as I like sauces cooked with the pasta. I was happy to make my kid a packed lunch after that

Honestly if she has a healthy appetite and enjoys food I’d let her have packed lunches. School dinners are rubbish. Especially in primary. I know it’s convenient and I’d love my children to have them too for that reason but they’re just not for them. My youngest especially won’t have school dinners, free or not. Don’t get me wrong he’ll eat pizza, nuggets and the rest of the child friendly crap but we don’t eat that at home on a daily basis. His favourite meal is chorizo in a creamy tomato sauce with peppers and spring onions. He revolted at school dinners.

I spent years doing packed lunches for older children, they are a pain and cost a heap of money (if you want to feed them actual food). Sandwiches get old so I ended up doing Bento boxes etc. With the younger children it was never an option put to them so it was never a discussion. I will admit that the school dinner offerings aren’t what our nursery prepared or what I do at home but it’s one less thing to worry about.

However, how much is she actually eating? Maybe worth a convo with the school dinner supervisors.

I do packed lunches for all four kids.
Sandwich, a piece of fruit for the girls and fridge raiders for my son, some veg, yoghurt for my youngest two, packet of crisps and a drink. The school dinners offered at the primary school are just rubbish.

Don't know how the dinners are at eldest DD's high school, but she has made it clear she wanted to bring her own food even before starting year 7

School meals may tick all the right boxes in terms of the nutritional rules they have to comply with but that does not mean they are actually healthy or nice.

This. You can get a lot nutritionally from a slice of cheap bread with a cup of milk & a vitamin, doesn't make it a good meal.

Often a chunk of the calorie is coming from a starchy pudding because it is a cheap. They aren't sugar laden, as they aren't allowed to be, however.

My kids get flavourful, nutritionally dense, fresh food at home. It's not cheap even with careful meal planning, solar panels on my roof reducing my energy bill, and me giving my time for free to cook & serve the food.

I honestly can't blame them for being disgusted at the reheated, processed, bland crap the school caterers serve up but equally i can't see how they can do much better on the budget they get.

Just won't catch me taking the time to shop for, pay for and prepare lunches when I've already paid taxes and so it goes towards a balanced meal ( not always an ideal in appeal but most of the time they're fine and a lot of the time they're nice dinners ) so I spend the money and time on other things.

At my ds's old school they were not allowed packed lunches and school meals were included in the fees. The meals were excellent and he definitely got his money's worth

What wonderfully helpful advice to a mother of a state school pupil eligible for free school meals

All state school children are entitled to free school meals up to year 2 regardless of income! My ds was actually entitled to fsm 's due to no income when he was at that school - and I was responding to a pp who was speaking about her ds's experience at his independent school.

Is there not a Cafeteria option with sandwiches and different fillings, biscuit or spoon of crisps, fruit, yogurt or the main pudding? I worked as a dinner lady for 22 years but sadly after Jamie Oliver's television programme the school meals quality went down rather than up. The bairns didn't want what was so called healthy, but nothing healthy about being hungry when they wouldn't eat it.. My school numbers in the small country school went down to under half. I'm retired now but by the time I left in 2014 the school meals menu was very poor. Free school meals now in Scotland for a lot of children and I think going by my grandchildren the government is paying for really scrimpy portions and poor selection of what is available.

Ask the school if u can visit and try a school dinner. Then you'll know.

Is there not more choice?

my 5 year old chooses a Ham wrap every day
every single day!

she’s happy With that

Sounds like you might be better asking for the vegetarian option for her?

In your position I'd be asking school to monitor what she eats and also asking to go in yourself for a trial meal to see what they are like for yourself (we got offered this before starting primary). I think she's quite possibly manipulating you as maybe one of her friends has packed lunch and she just wants to sit with them - they are often seated seperately so packed lunches sit together and school lunches sit where there is space. But thats why you need to know what she eats from someone in school who watches her. My sons' primary school always offered a salad bar and a choice of jacket potato or sandwich as well as main meal, but sometimes when they are just starting, kids aren't always aware of the options. Both my sons love cucumber and pepper so used to get a portion of those with everything they had.

Probably not popular but I would absolutely have kept them on school meals if they were free. Free school meals up to Y2 were brought in when my youngest was y3 so we missed out on that. I would have jumped at that 10 years ago and we weren't in a cost if living crisis then! Feeding 2 is not cheap. One has autism and the other we suspect has also, but in my view they got to try different foods having school dinners, so actually they aren't that fussy now. Having a child with SEN is extremely expensive and we didn't have a lot of spare money so free school meals would have have been a huge difference to us.

They are much older now and do have packed lunch since covid, when they were in secondary. Packed lunch isn't a cheap option in my opinion but it's probably cheaper than buying everything individually from the eatery/hall like secondaries and sixth forms do. I absolutely LOATHE making them though. It gets worse every single week. I hate it. And I know they could be doing it themselves at their age but they both leave before half 7 on college buses and don't get in until after 5, so it's a long day for them, and as I'm not working at the moment I do it. It's a brain ache doing it, making sure we have enough food in and it takes time (even though they have the same every day - it's harder to do if you want to vary it).

A 4 to 5 year old is capable of a high degree of manipulation and is very persistent in trying patience to get what they want (which may just be where they physically sit for lunch). It's always good to get adult corroboration for an independent viewpoint. If I'd listened to my sons every comment I would have been rolling in electronics by the age of 5 as it sounded like everyone else in the class had xbox, PlayStation switch, phone etc and I was the parent out of touch. A few conversations at the school gates made me realise this was not the case! (it all came later mind). But that just shows how manipulative a young child can be - not saying its the case here, but it could be.

I'd go school lunches and maybe packed lunch Friday as a treat. That's the compromise I've come too with my year four. Firstly as its free for school lunches for all years in London so why turn that down. Secondly we have a lot of evening activities such as brownies, karate, gymnastics so at least I know she's had a hot meal that day if we have to have quick picnic tea that evening. She enjoys roast dinners, pizzas and jacket potatoes there.

I’m a teacher, school caterers have to make food nutritious and I eat them often. I’d eat them daily but they’re expensive for staff.

my kids go to my school and they love the food and aren’t picky eaters. Our school has a choice of 4 meals a day. Most I know of do.

my daughter, who loved the dinners, has asked for packed lunches because her best friend has them since she’s gone vegan. I’ve put my foot down and said no. She’s got 7 months of free school dinners and she’s having them.

the food will be nutritious and sustainable too. Ignore the haters who are thinking back to the dinners of the 80s and 90s and stick to your guns.

Surely they get a choice? In our school there is the main option (or a veggie man in option) or they can choose jacket potato with tuna, cheese, beans, salad OR they can grab a sandwich. Same for pudding - main option, or fruit or yoghurt or jelly.
Id defo try and keep to school meals!! Ask the school, as there many be more choice.

In our county it's just hot meat option or hot veggie.

In ours it depends on the size of the school.

If she wasn't eating her dinner at school they would let you know so she might be complaining but it's unlikely she's going hungry.

Many posters are mentioning a baked potato option. My DTs loved a baked potato. Piping hot from the oven, scooped out and mixed with butter , then cheese (which melted) and piled back in while it was still warm…
The baked potato option in school bears no resemblance to this! Lukewarm spud, watery tuna and unmeltng processed ‘cheese’ ..nah!

At my DC's primary there was no sandwich or jacket potato option. Just the main course (meat or veggie).

Many posters are mentioning a baked potato option. My DTs loved a baked potato. Piping hot from the oven, scooped out and mixed with butter , then cheese (which melted) and piled back in while it was still warm…
The baked potato option in school bears no resemblance to this! Lukewarm spud, watery tuna and unmeltng processed ‘cheese’ ..nah!

Yes! We do have a baked potato option but ours are barely warm and rock hard, with leathery skin and unmelted plastic cheese (or the aforementioned watery tuna). Nothing like the ones we make at home. Everything is just such low quality - unsurprising, given that its done on a shoestring (and getting worse as food prices increase).