School dinners v packed lunch

[F05ters1]

Reception age daughter begging to go on packed lunches already after 6 weeks of full time school.

Every day without fail when I ask her what was for lunch I get... fishfingers chips and beans, I didn't like the chips and I'm off beans so I ate the fish fingers. Please can I take a packed lunch?

pasta and cheese, I didn't like the cheese and the pasta was soggy so I just had the biscuit for pudding. when can I go on packed lunch?

mince and dumplings today, mince was too salty and the dumpling was soggy, please can I go on packed lunches?

blah blah takes a packed lunch. (dd has even approached said mum who said her dd was a picky eater 🙄)

why can't you just say I'm a picky eater mum!

For context she'll eat a salmon fillet at home but won't eat a fishfinger.
She'll eat fillet steak but not a burger.
She eats all veg and salad but isn't keen on meat. I make soup packed with lentils and do lots of eggy things for protein

I'm torn. school meals are free and I work shifts, it's been a godsend not having to worry about lunch for the four year old restaurant critic! but she is so adamant, should I relent?

Try her on the veggie menu.

It varies so much, at my sons UK primary school the food was very good, the only day he had pack up was a Friday as he doesn’t like aubergine and it was veggie lasagne on Fridays. His current school has very good food, everyday there is a fish, meat and veggie dish, children are also given fruit, veg and salad, but unlike a lot of places the veg isn’t boiled to death and the food is actually seasoned, all free too throughout compulsory schooling.

Our school dinners sound nice, one meat option, one veggie, always a jacket potato and salad option.

The spuds are without question, minging, over cooked and often tough as old boots. There's no butter or salt. The cheese is the grated stuff that arrives in 3kg bags and is coated in flour to stop it sticking together. It's doesn't melt, even with a ladel of molted beans over the top.

Pasta/noodles can have been sat there for 45 minutes before it ends up on your plate. It's gelatinous and solid. If you're at the back of the queue you get the dog ends.

Somethings, like the cheese flan do look nice, but not if you've also got to stomach boiled potatoes (which taste like the ones out of a can) and steamed veg that's been cooking for two hours so it's mushy etc.

Burger in a bun. Sound ok, it's bread that's dry because it's been defrosted, the burger, also dry, you know when you've had a McDonald's but then left it there and the burger goes sort of, rubbery? They're like that straight out of the kitchen.

Remember what the government thought was acceptable to feed free school meals children during lockdown? They don't give a shit, the weekly budget per child is about £2.75. School cooks are doing their best but it's not great.

Similar issue here OP. I want her to carry on with school dinners for all the reasons you list plus I’m hoping peer pressure might encourage her to try some new foods!! (Worked at pre school.) We are sticking with it for now…I encourage her to have the free fruit and milk in the morning and pack a big afternoon snack. I think part of it is understanding that things don’t have to be her favourite food, as long as you don’t actively hate it you just have to get on and eat it. Our biggest issue is she won’t even TRY a jacket potato, and the veggie and meat mains tend to be variations on the same thing (eg beef burger/vegan burger).

I understand iour maths but if this happened sone kids would never have food. Their school meal is a lifeline ( and for some it's not just because of cash available to parents)

Does her school have options? Schools in my area have a meat option a veggie option a sandwich option and some a jacket potato option. Did she pick her meals or did the school/you? If there are options play around with them for a bit.

That will soon teach her to stop complaining about school dinners!

There’s a real reason why numbers of uptake drop off for ks2, they are mainly grim. We have a choice of 3 available, meat, vegetarian and jacket/wrap depending on the day. Two people that I’ve spoken to that have seen them say they aren’t good. My daughter will eat the fish option but none of the others. To entice kids when numbers are low they had a menu change to pizza and old fashioned school cake.

Is she allowed to do a mixture? I'd compromise and let her have packed lunch twice a week.

She'd tell you that they were serving toasted gerbils and unicorn chips if she thought it would get her closer to having half a cream cheese sandwich, mini cheddars, two frubes, a sugary drink and a Penguin (or whatever particularly salty, sweet or low nutrition stuff she sees the packed lunch kids having that she likes).

Make your decision on that basis - she's telling you what she thinks will get her what she wants.

It depends on the quality of the cooking for the school lunches. Worth seeing if you can find out, would the school let you visit for one?

DD1 used to take a thermos flask with either soup or pasta, on the rare occasions I relented and did a pack lunch (I agree with you, they are free, and I've got enough to do!). That's quite easy to do, and crucially you don't need to make sure you have all the various fresh ingredients.

Ds wouldn’t ever contemplate a school lunch, he has taken a packed lunch every day of his school life, he’s 12!
I worked at his junior school and the lunches looked dreadful, grey meat, sloppy veg, the amount of food that got scraped into the bin at the end of lunch when I was walking through the hall back to the classroom was staggering. So many parents must think their dc are having a ‘main meal’ at lunch and so just do them something small for dinner!
Make the packed lunch, I’ve got it down to a fine art when I need to make them now (ds usually does it himself now), takes about 2 minutes to make a sandwich and throw in fruit, yoghurt and a couple of other bits. At least she’ll eat something.

DS had school dinners every day until I started as a catering assistant in a school and saw just how awful the meals are. Such poor quality meat, very processed food and little in the way of veggies. Now he has packed lunches. The puddings however are fine, homemade and tasty.

There’s a choice of about 6-7 different things a day at my DS’s primary. He’s also in reception and he gets to choose what he has each day which tends to either be a ham sandwich or tomato pasta tbh… I’m grateful because it’s free and, like you, I work long hours and it’s an extra stress worrying about making a packed lunch.

I see the same menu served in different schools by different cooks and the difference is enormous. At one school I go to the chicken curry (Wednesdays every third week) is boiled chicken served with a separate sauce. The broccoli is grey. They get half a slice of a sliced white loaf on their 'prison tray' . The trays are red!

At another school, the chicken curry is made from scratch and I can smell it all slow cooking when I arrive. The children get a tiny home made bread bun on their white plate.

My dc went to school where there were no packed lunches. The mostly had pasta in a Thermos funtainer.

Schools I've known wouldn't allow swapping between meal/packed lunch during the week.
There should be a vegetarian option each day. Ask to see the menu which usually works on a 4 week rota and go over her choices. Making a choice in the queue can be difficult as they are rushed through.
As a PP has said speak to the teacher and ask if someone can check on what she's actually eating. She may be saying she's not eating because she wants a packed lunch like her friend.
I know lots are saying how poor dinners can be but I sometimes help out in a school I taught at and their dinners are lovely but child choices can make the plates look very unappetising . Also many schools offer additional salad /veg.

If it continues then a packed lunch may be a better option , kids cope much better at school feeling full.

I think there's a difference between inedible slop like the NHS and some school meals and the snobbery about baked beans. School is a long day for children with lots of physical activity, fish fingers and chips will be the only.meal some kids get per day and is perfectly OK. The meal my mum was given, which was a lump of fish with some half cooked potatoes and tinned peaches, all slopped on the same plate is something I doubt my dog would have wanted. But loving the competitive mums "I don't know why but Crispin will only eat fresh escargot with French brandy and he wouldn't touch a fish finger" 😀

School dinners at our school are appalling. ( There was a taster session). Since then we have been doing packed lunches. No regret. I reasoned I couldn't justify letting my daughter eat what I wouldn't eat myself.

They do sound rank. My kids school dinners was more nutritious and varied than they sound. But they mainly had packed lunch. God I’m glad I no longer have to make them anymore as I got so tired of doing it every morning or evening before.

This is why I wish all parents could see what their children are being served. So many think they're eating well at school, but the menus / taster meals are very deceptive compared to what the children are actually given.

The reality is most of the food is thrown away, and I wonder how some children get through the day having eaten so little, or in some cases nothing at all.

I don't make packed lunches. They get a decent meal at school and making packed lunches is my line in the sand.

It's the most boring of jobs and they always have the option of jacket potato if they really don't want the main option.

The vegetarians options are often worse unless you go to a school that has a lot of vegetarians.

I once worked in a school that was completely vegetarian and the food was excellent.

The school I am at now it is terrible.

Small schools often don't have any options at all, apart from vegetarian meals. Whereas at big schools there will be a choice of main meals and baked potatoes. Even sandwiches.

*This is why I wish all parents could see what their children are being served. So many think they're eating well at school, but the menus / taster meals are very deceptive compared to what the children are actually given.

The reality is most of the food is thrown away, and I wonder how some children get through the day having eaten so little, or in some cases nothing at all.*

I agree. I won't tell a child to try and eat some more, I can't bring myself to. I just say 'are you sure you don't want to eat some pasta' or something along those lines.

On Fridays every three weeks ours have salmon gougons and I don't think a single child eats one. They seem to absolutely hate them.

The reason for the drop off is because parents have to start paying for them and some either can't afford or don't want to pay the £500ish per year it would be. Those who are on free school meals continue to have them and many others besides.

Schools wouldn't want to encourage kids to take up dinners if the numbers were low. Firstly, most school meals are provided by third party catering companies rather than the school itself. Beyond that, at the moment, the government funding per meal is lower than the cost of the meal so schools are having to prop up the school dinner system from their own budgets.

I am a school midday supervisor and it's an absolute nightmare trying to get (some) kids to eat their school dinner. I'd be happy with them eating half of it but some won't touch it at all and I worry they will be hungry as school is a long day. I totally understand why you would want her to be on school dinners though. I would maybe let her have a packed lunch sometimes, like on the days where the lunch is something she really doesn't like. Alternatively schools usually offer a sandwich or jacket potato as another option would she eat those?