… to be mad at ill colleague?

[Rewindthefilm]

A colleague who ALWAYS comes in to work even when badly ill only to moan about being ill and touches every work surface going and leaves their food and drink all over the place insisted on being in work before half term started for all of us. I was sympathetic but kept my distance. However I have clearly ended up catching their horrible cold and it is wrecking my half term- I have had to cancel a few plans with friends because I don’t feel great and don’t want to risk them catching anything and I’m lacking the focus to even sit and read at home. So it feels like half a week wasted already. On top of this, I’m pregnant and having spoken to a pharmacist and midwife, there’s loads of cough medicines I can’t have. The colleague doesn’t know I’m pregnant as I haven’t said, but surely that’s not the only reason you should be mindful of others when ill, right?

I feel like I’ve been robbed of my downtime because my colleague was selfish. They have a martyr complex that many others have noted- definitely isn’t the first time they have come in when quite ill, complained about how bad they’ve felt and then been oblivious to how germs spread by not cleaning up after themselves or observing personal space.

Of course I won’t go into work next week and accuse them of ruining half term or be unprofessional towards them but AIBU for feeling mad towards them right now?

If she can't WFH then of course she was at work with a cold

Yes, it's miserable, especially when pregnant (between pregnancy and bfing I had several winters in a row unable to take anything decent) but you just get on with it.

Then why are you angry with your colleague if management didn't enforce their own policy?

You have a very unusual school where managers are happy for teachers to ring in with a cold every time they get one, and have it not trigger anything at all with HR.

Are they just as happy for parents to keep their kids home every time they get a cold too?

If not, it's pretty pointless really.

Could you and some colleagues put together an anonymous note to HR asking them to reinforce please stay home if ill, covid is still circulating and may be serious for some staff sort of thing.

Lol. I don't work in a school, but from what I know of them, this would never ever happen.

Thanks everyone. I will definitely ask the union rep if we can push hygiene notices again especially in shared areas. We had loads of them up during covid. You would just think you wouldn’t need to reinforce good hygiene with grown ups!

I’ve been on here a lot for the last few days, as I tested positive for covid on Saturday.

Nobody in my social circle has it, nobody in Hubbies world has it,

I can only have caught this from work - and we all know who it is.

it is extremely unfair of this person to come in to work, because apparently our huge company can’t function and will be bankrupt without her!

it is extremely unfair of this person to infect a 65 year old, whose partner is jumping up and down at the directors, that this isn’t the first time her “elderly boyfriend” has caught something nasty from a selfish colleague.

Apparently, there is alot more people off including me, and it is causing a backlog now :-)

People like these, should be told, by their senior officers, if you are ill and you could hurt someone long term with your germy illness, self isolate.

I will be complaining next week when I go back in, covid can and has killed people with weakened immune systems, whilst others have been left with long covid.

I hope once your over this cold you will be in fine fettle and good luck with your new life xxx - I’d still give em hell though ;-)

Not at all selfish to attend school / work with a cold, if well enough to work

I can see both sides. A simple cold can make me ill for three weeks - I'm very susceptible to them - so I do feel anger if I'm exposed to someone's cold because whereas it might be nothing to them, it will floor me.

But most employers aren't very sympathetic to taking time off with a cold. If you can't WFH I can see why you would want to go in, especially if you'd had other sickness absence in the last few months.

I’m pregnant and recently had a cold- it was absolutely miserable because I couldn’t take any medicine. It really took it out of me, everyone’s saying the colds that are going around at the moment are absolute shiters.

If you work in a school then she can’t just work at home. If your sickness policy is anything like ours then warnings are giving if you’re off 3 times in a year. People don’t want to take sick leave for a cold. Unless you never go shopping or out in public you’re being ridiculous and it’s only a cold. Do people take medication for colds? I never have

@LaughterTitsoff it was more than a cold- just when I posted I couldn’t think of what to call it but they were too ill to work and they admitted it too. The sickness policy doesn’t dictate what you can and can’t call in sick for, just that you are not well enough to work. Management trust you to make that decision and only when you have hit a certain amount of sick day notices (so a two day sickness bug counts as one instance) in a certain period of time does it trigger a meeting. Most people are ok coming in to work with a cold and that is up to them but good hygiene is always appreciated!

@ScroogeMcDuckling wishing you a speedy recovery!

OP can you answer the question about the children taking time off with colds?

Are the school just as generous towards them, as they are towards staff?

Yeah, YADNBU. "Mine" was actually a supervisor who always bragged about what a huge number of sick leave hours she had and made 'remarks' about staff calling in because 'she never did'.

Yeah bitch, because you came in deathly ill, infected all of us, and we did the right thing, we took the time off so as not to infect our coworkers. Unfortunately, we often brought it home to our families!

These days, post Covid, I expect we'd all pointedly wear masks and continually use hand sanitizer. But that long ago (been retired for 15 years) that wouldn't have occurred to us.

Yes! With the good old day nurse (before they took it away <sob>) the combination of paracetamol and decongestant meant I could function at a nearly normal level even with a truly rotten cold. Complete game changer.

You're changing your argument here.

You either get the hump when staff come in with a cold or you don't?

And if the kids have to, what difference does it make?

Appalling behaviour - needs raising with HR as to protocol for illness for the future. There are some nasty bugs going round. A serious cough and cold, should be off, not spreading it around colleagues.
I've had it before when a really sick colleague was in (coughing and cold) and not sent home. I caught it and was ill for something like 3 weeks with it. Ruined a holiday and Christmas, think I even had to take some sick days. Was really angry.

I get it and totally agree with people you shouldn't be going in sick however most places i have worked in penalize you for being, in my current place if you even take 1 hour sick leave u loose your bonus of 1k take home pay at xmas, its just too much money for people to loose. Lucky most of us can work from home
You could be like my friend though, whos place also has an attendance bonus but you are NOT ALLOWED to work from home so she has to go in for her mandatory days in the office or else looses big money. Aswell as that take two days sick and you are called up in front of the manger. Its awful. You would have thought Covid has forced business to realise people actually can be sick and shouldn't be penalized for it but no

the issue is then it depends on the sickness policy of the company and how many days they may have already used up

It’s astounding to me that some of the fundamental learning from Covid have been so quickly forgotten. Really basic hygiene stuff like covering your mouth when coughing, washing your hands properly and regularly, don’t touch your face. And the fact that the same virus can be mild in some people and make others dangerously ill, so show a bit of courtesy and consideration.

i didn’t get ill for nearly three years, a silver lining of lockdown. I don’t understand why other people want to avoid being ill too if they possibly can.

What’s ridiculous is one person comes in sick and then infects multiple others which means more people are sick and even if they come in - let’s face it - they’re not doing their best work.
I don’t understand why more companies who had whole teams off earlier in the pandemic haven’t got enough brain cells to stop it happening.
Covid hasn’t gone away- they’re literally decimating the work force and future workforce for little gain now.

Sorry I may be in the minority but YABU. Schools are notoriously bad for just keeping going despite illness, most headteachers would not be best pleased if teachers were off regularly with just colds. In fact most of the general population just keep going when they've got a cold.

YANBU. Some muppet being an ill martyr would put me in hospital for a week. It's annoying.

of course she should be at work if she just has a cold as should you. I can't believe the number of people who have voted YANBU when it's just a cold.

@WhateverMate if parent/ carer rings in to say their child is ill and not coming in, it’s not our place to decide whether they come in or not! We wouldn’t send any child home for having sniffles but if they are looking faint or struggling to breathe then we’d take them out of lessons for sure. Wouldn’t go as far as Dettol-ing them 😉

And if it happened too often it would trigger an attendance problem, yes?

So why not for the teachers when they keep ringing in with colds?