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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to think suits are inappropriate for sixth formers?

223 replies

allsfairin · 31/10/2023 12:48

I have had children go to several different sixth forms, some require suits and ties for boys / matching tailored skirt and jacket for girls. Some have a much more relaxed dress code.

My niece is now attending a sixth form which requires her to wear the matching tailored jacket and skirt, and she bought quite an expensive one, but the skirt is deemed too short and she needs to buy another. These items of clothing cost a lot especially for girls, and she has to wear the same one every day, as she can't really afford two.

My son attended this school more than 10 years ago, and I was happy enough for him to conform to the suit rules then, particularly as boys can quite often pick up suits in second hand shops, so nothing like the expense. It was, and is, a great school, he did very well, and has gone on to a great career.

However, he has never worn a suit since the day he left school, and nor have my other children. It did seem a bit old fashioned ten years ago, but these days, suits seem to me to quite often be a long way from acceptable business wear, and in fact to denote low status in the work place, whereas successful individuals generally wear smart/casual, or even casual/casual.

Looking at my own adult children and their friends, I know successful young people in music, science, finance, event management, energy, engineering - not one ever wears a suit, or even owns one, I know that by the frantic whats apps about 9pm on the evening before an interview recently when a friend of a friend suddenly wondered if he should be attending his interview in a suit and was messaging everyone he knew to see if he could borrow one, and the answer was no, no one possessed one

So IABU to think the insistence on suits in sixth form is outdated and obsolete, and these days denotes low, rather than high status? I think quite a lot of teachers still wear them, and maybe politicians, but these seem to be the only areas of life where they are still quite common

OP posts:
BirthdayFlower · 31/10/2023 13:30

My kids’ school has business casual in the sixth form which seems reasonable. I agree schools haven’t really caught up with the real world. Then again, there are still little kids going to school in boaters so it’s hardly just a sixth form issue.

StoneWashJeansWithAMatchingJacket · 31/10/2023 13:31

I don’t understand the point of suits and ties etc in sixth form. I don’t know many, if any, people who have to wear the whole suit and tie to work every day in their career/job. Certainly not day to day. Dress code, sure, but not the whole shebang. But according to my nephew who has to wear a suit it’s to “help prepare them for the world of work”. I don’t see why it does.

comfieday · 31/10/2023 13:35

Agree with the majority of posters. What if they are studying Art, Drama or Music?? Prancing round in a suit is going to be a total hindrance!

Whataretheodds · 31/10/2023 13:37

SiblingFights · 31/10/2023 12:56

I guess it is their way of making sure that they are dressing how they deem appropriately, as otherwise they'd be in ripped jeans and crop tops?

Easy enough to have a few ground rules in the 6th form dress code. A life skill to learn how to dress appropriately for environment/occasion.

Agree unnecessary to have 6th formers wearing suits.

BoohooWoohoo · 31/10/2023 13:40

My older son went to a school with suits and the kids looked smarter than the teachers which is silly.
My younger son goes to a school which is more relaxed so goes in cargos, sweatshirt and black Airforces which is absolutely fine. I understand some rules like no bare midriffs but there are odd rules like no jeans even when you can't tell if a pair of trousers are denim or not. Considering that Uni doesn't have a dress code, I think that it's petty and silly.

Mumof2teens79 · 31/10/2023 13:43

Yes it's completely outdated and obsolete.
Most of these 6th forms send the kids to university any way,they aren't wearing suits there!

Mumof2teens79 · 31/10/2023 13:47

PuttingDownRoots · 31/10/2023 12:54

20 years ago, my school was one of the very few in the area who didn't do the suits thing.

It was the girls super selective school... and despite our lack of formal dressing we still managed to get onto the high flying University courses we wanted with our strings of A grades.

Really 20 yrs ago?
I was in 6th form 25 yrs ago and this was not a thing at any other 6th form as far as I was aware (although I didn’t know anyone at the private 6th forms tbf)

I thought this was a relatively new thing, last 10 yrs. It seems more common in the academy trusts trying to be elite.....the truly successful colleges that everyone wants to get into locally have no dress code.

Mumof2teens79 · 31/10/2023 13:48

SiblingFights · 31/10/2023 12:56

I guess it is their way of making sure that they are dressing how they deem appropriately, as otherwise they'd be in ripped jeans and crop tops?

And that would never do ??

Comefromaway · 31/10/2023 13:50

The majority of schools in my area do not have 6th forms so everyone goes to a 6th form college. There are no rules on clothes, nothing wrong with ripped jeans and a crop top. It doesn't seem to affect results and everyone can dress how they please.

Sweetpeasaremadeforbees · 31/10/2023 13:51

I think it's a bit of an outdated idea in this day and age but it seems to be more of a school 6th form thing than a 6th form college thing IME. DD (college) can wear what she wants but no ripped jeans or cropped top type clothing (I assume because so many of the courses are vocational that the less skin exposed the better). It's been great not having to buy more clothes that she'll probably never wear again.

TheaBrandt · 31/10/2023 13:54

The girls at our local school with this dress code end up looking like sort of dodgy “sexy secretary” look circa 2004 which is a teen girls idea of “office wear”. Dd wears baggy jeans and nice sweater. Know which I prefer.

ScarletWitchM · 31/10/2023 14:10

My DD didn’t go to the school 6th form as they didn’t have the subjects she needed so went to a 6th form college where everyone wore what they want, and nobody cared about hair colour or styles! And now she’s at uni which is the same. The school uniform thing is a complete nonsense

catmothertes1 · 31/10/2023 14:10

It's amazing that so many countries seem to manage to educate their children and young people when they are wearing normal clothes!

easylikeasundaymorn · 31/10/2023 14:13

comfieday · 31/10/2023 13:35

Agree with the majority of posters. What if they are studying Art, Drama or Music?? Prancing round in a suit is going to be a total hindrance!

I agree that suits are unnecessary but not sure why they'd be a particular hindrance in those subjects? If they want to be actors they could be working in anything from a full on corset and petticoats to nothing at all! For music, many orchestras require formal wear, etc. The majority of suits wouldn't limit range of movement more than equivalent trousers/jeans (less so than the very skinny ones that were popular until recently), and a long sleeved top.

InvisibleDuck · 31/10/2023 14:21

A sensible dress code is better than suits.
Suits are better than keeping sixth formers in school uniform.

I left school at 16 but the sixth form there allowed any reasonable clothing while I was there. Most students wore jeans! By the time my younger sister got there, they required business suits. Then of course there were problems with too-short skirt suits. Now the sixth formers there are in uniform from a single supplier, like the lower school.

Progressive infantilisation if you ask me.

TenderDandelions · 31/10/2023 14:35

PuttingDownRoots · 31/10/2023 12:54

20 years ago, my school was one of the very few in the area who didn't do the suits thing.

It was the girls super selective school... and despite our lack of formal dressing we still managed to get onto the high flying University courses we wanted with our strings of A grades.

Ditto. In fact, in the "outstanding" Ofsted report the school received while I was in sixth form, the only thing they actually commented as a negative was that the sixth form looked "a little scruffy"! Out of 180 girls in the year, over 150 of them went to University, many to Oxford and Cambridge (not me though - I'm one of the 30 that didn't go, but have still been successful in my career!).

I'd have no issues with the school having a dress code (i.e. no vest tops/crop tops/hot pants/"golf club rules" kind of thing) but it does seem OTT to require full professional business wear. They'll peddle out that they're "setting them up for their working life", but a) not everyone goes on to work in an office; b) offices don't always require fully suited and booted any more; and c) they've just spent 12 years wearing a uniform, so I think they'll have got the message by now!

YANBU OP.

Comefromaway · 31/10/2023 15:03

easylikeasundaymorn · 31/10/2023 14:13

I agree that suits are unnecessary but not sure why they'd be a particular hindrance in those subjects? If they want to be actors they could be working in anything from a full on corset and petticoats to nothing at all! For music, many orchestras require formal wear, etc. The majority of suits wouldn't limit range of movement more than equivalent trousers/jeans (less so than the very skinny ones that were popular until recently), and a long sleeved top.

Having two children and myself who studied those subjects, if you are performing in a corset then your choreo/moveent will be set accordingly. You cannot have full range of movement in a drama or dance class in a suit. And not all orchestras require formalwear. My son wears black jeans, black short sleeved shirt and converse.

comfieday · 31/10/2023 15:07

I agree that suits are unnecessary but not sure why they'd be a particular hindrance in those subjects? If they want to be actors they could be working in anything from a full on corset and petticoats to nothing at all! For music, many orchestras require formal wear, etc.

Haha! Sorry but suits are NOT appropriate dress for arts subjects! If they are in acting training they'll need to be doing physical work! Including expressive movement! They are not "in role" as 1980's business people! What an odd comment. Likewise you think a suit is an appropriate option in the Art studio?!

pointythings · 31/10/2023 15:09

The businesswear obsession is just an extension of the uniform obsession that plagues the UK. I was so glad when mine went to a 6th form that was completely non uniform - it saved me an absolute fortune.

PhotoDad · 31/10/2023 15:13

Comefromaway · 31/10/2023 15:03

Having two children and myself who studied those subjects, if you are performing in a corset then your choreo/moveent will be set accordingly. You cannot have full range of movement in a drama or dance class in a suit. And not all orchestras require formalwear. My son wears black jeans, black short sleeved shirt and converse.

DD was at a "suits" sixth form. Her increasingly paint-spattered suit trousers are still part of her look now that she's at art-school...!

SnapdragonToadflax · 31/10/2023 15:15

It's ridiculous. No-one wears suits anymore, I don't know anyone who wears a suit for work. Most people seem to wear smart-ish jeans or trousers, or a dress. Even in an important client meeting, there are no suits. Maybe an unstructured, non-matching jacket on some of the men, a few blazers perhaps.

We wore our own clothes to 6th form in the 90s, and managed to get perfectly decent grades in ripped jeans and vest tops. We were also capable of understanding that we needed to dress more neatly for work.

Comefromaway · 31/10/2023 15:21

Yes, I work in an office and although I sometimes choose to wear a blazer it is never as part of a suit.

Newgirls · 31/10/2023 15:31

It’s old fashioned and outdated. Round here we have schools that do this and others that don’t. The one without uniform seems to be one of the most successful for outcomes. There are still rules about covering middles and mid sleeves but they are trusted to look reasonable and it works. I think suits show a lack of trust in the students to be honest

JC89 · 31/10/2023 15:32

Unnecessary? Maybe. Inappropriate? No.

GrassWillBeGreener · 31/10/2023 15:33

The biggest problem with 6th form dress code = suits, is for girls IMO. To buy matching jacket and skirt almost always leads you to very straight skirts - which means they have to be short or you literally can't move. We had quite a time of it several years ago when my daughter was supposed to have a black suit for chapel - we settled on finding a skirt that fitted and she was comfortable in, and a jacket that fitted, where they were a close-enough match (amazing how many different blacks there can be ...). Nothing sold as a suit was remotely right for a teenager.