Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think that my parents are utterly abhorrent?

174 replies

Mysteriousgirl2 · 29/10/2023 09:09

They are racist, homophobic and sexist. Just generally horrible people who have no empathy or idea about the world around them. They hate all refugees and think that they ‘deserve it’

They are incredibly selfish and wealthy. They have never helped me with my three young DC even though they have never worked and have loads of time.

One of them is an alcoholic and they both drink drive all the time and have two big powerful SUVs. I don’t know how they haven’t had any bad crashes yet.

I think I hate them. AIBU?

OP posts:
AutumnFroglets · 29/10/2023 14:50

Great. My eldest is 8. That would mean that you’ve already had 16-24 nights off more than me.

I had zero. Nada. None. But I'm not resentful or bitter. Be grateful you have a partner that came to your aid, there are many who don't even have that. Count your blessings and move on.

You can report drunk drivers anonymously. Your parents won't send in the assassins but the families of those killed by your drunk parents because you didn't, might do so.

Mari9999 · 29/10/2023 15:11

@Mysteriousgirl2
Can't you and your husband afford to hire the occasional sitter for a night out or a night off. You have said what they do not bring to your life, but what do you bring to their lives other than expectations.and disappointment?

Busephalus · 29/10/2023 15:14

Why do they need 2 cars, let alone 2 suvs?

Longbarn5 · 29/10/2023 15:14

I agree that you should report them regarding the drink driving issue. This is truly awful and they need to be stopped!

Ponderingwindow · 29/10/2023 15:15

You should never leave your child with an alcoholic, not even for a few minutes. So the fact that they do not help with the children is irrelevant.

Notmetoo · 29/10/2023 15:17

WandaWonder · 29/10/2023 09:13

You chose to have 3 children, if they are so terrible why would you want them around your children?

Nor helping with the children isn't the main focus of OPs post and she doesn't say she would want them around her children.
OP they sound very unpleasant and YANBU

Ryanstartedthefire2 · 29/10/2023 15:30

More power to you for realising the truth!

DriftingDora · 29/10/2023 19:07

OopsaDazy · 29/10/2023 14:18

They are incredibly powerful people.

what on earth does this mean?

Royalty?

MPs?

Mafia?

Fingers in lots of local businesses?

They're Harry & Meg. obviously. 😂 It gets better by the minute. Never mind, kids go back to school soon.

DriftingDora · 29/10/2023 19:09

Has the OP told us yet why she'd want two drunks looking after her kids?

tuvamoodyson · 29/10/2023 19:10

Do YOU think you’re being unreasonable?

Firsttimemum120 · 29/10/2023 20:23

@Mysteriousgirl2 my child isn’t even 2. I have a night off every 6 months. I’m having one in 3 weeks and then not again until May. It works by me and her dads birthday celebrations.

you need to feel the way you feel and suck it up and get on with it. There’s no way I’d want to even think about or feel sad that I can’t leave my child with parents like that. My two year old doesn’t have a blood grandad either side apart from my grandad. Her dads dad never existed in his life and my dad was a crack cocaine user and died of an overdose 3 years ago.

i also don’t have “ the most help” I don’t live with her dad. He pays me £40 a week but buys her nothing else unless I beg literal beg. I mean he got her a toy in May and has only just now bought her shoes after I took her in some rank looking ones that needed replacing unintentionally making him feel bad. He doesn’t have our child on his own the last time was May for 2 hours. We seen him for 6 hours in total over this whole weekend. Our relationship is working out but it’s been a struggle. I work full time and get help with benefits but still struggle to make things happen as I say I pay for everything. His money per week covers her lunch food and some dinners and then nappies and wipes per week that is all.

You need to accept life for what it is and get on with it. My world was hard for the first year of her life and now I’m accepting it. I get more then some people but everyone always wants more then they have. Your parents are unfit parents that isn’t your fault it’s there’s. You can’t do nothing about it and you should be sticking your finger up with a great big fuck you I don’t neeed you attitude.

Yocal · 29/10/2023 20:34

Mysteriousgirl2 · 29/10/2023 13:54

I would really like to report them.

However here are some issues:

  1. I do not live near them so I don’t know exactly when they drive home from the pub/ nights out. I definitely do not socialise with them.
  2. They have 4 different vehicles so would I give all those Reg numbers?
  3. They are incredibly powerful people. If they find out I did this, they might harm me or my DC. (They have done similar to someone in the past who crossed them)
Show quote history

WTAF

Point 3. Erm. I think you should fake your own death mate and don't leave a forwarding address

Ktime · 29/10/2023 20:39

Mysteriousgirl2 · 29/10/2023 09:14

Ok @MummyShah369 here you go for the facts.

They inherited their money.
They had huge amounts of help from both sets of grandparents bringing us up.
They had nannies until my oldest sibling went to boarding school at 7.

They are in their 60s and in full health (albeit as functioning alcoholics). They could easily help if they wanted to.

I hope they drop dead. Can’t fucking abide racists and anti refugees/.

Kinneddar · 29/10/2023 22:30

They are incredibly powerful people. If they find out I did this, they might harm me or my DC. (They have done similar to someone in the past who crossed them

And it was at this point the thread totally jumped the shark.....

Gummybear23 · 29/10/2023 22:35

Kinneddar · 29/10/2023 22:30

They are incredibly powerful people. If they find out I did this, they might harm me or my DC. (They have done similar to someone in the past who crossed them

And it was at this point the thread totally jumped the shark.....

What do you mean Incredibly powerful?

Incredible twats I see.

Explain powerful.

Kinneddar · 29/10/2023 22:40

@Gummybear23 it was the OP who said that. I was quoting her

MummyShah369 · 30/10/2023 06:00

I think it’s really hard for you as you have had a childhood where you have seen luxury but now you are in their position you don’t have access to the same resources… I sympathise but others out there in a better or worse situation you just have to come to terms with things and do the best you can

DriftingDora · 30/10/2023 08:15

Kinneddar · 29/10/2023 22:30

They are incredibly powerful people. If they find out I did this, they might harm me or my DC. (They have done similar to someone in the past who crossed them

And it was at this point the thread totally jumped the shark.....

Watch out, you'll find a horse's head in your bed....

SurprisedWithAHorse · 30/10/2023 09:13

DriftingDora · 30/10/2023 08:15

Watch out, you'll find a horse's head in your bed....

Show quote history

I know it was you, OP!

You broke my heart! You broke my heart!

DriftingDora · 30/10/2023 09:58

SurprisedWithAHorse · 30/10/2023 09:13

I know it was you, OP!

You broke my heart! You broke my heart!

Show quote history

😂😂

CoffeeCantata · 30/10/2023 15:52

OP - are they involved in criminal activity?

Not being facetious, but the way you describe them smacks very much of people who've made their money through crime (the hard and selfish attitudes, the ostentatious cars, disregard for anyone else's safety etc).

You say they inherited their money and have never worked?? The whole situation sounds bizarre.

Original poster
Mysteriousgirl2 · 30/10/2023 17:10

DriftingDora · 30/10/2023 09:58

😂😂

Show quote history

I don’t understand any of these references. What’s going on?

OP posts:
Original poster
Mysteriousgirl2 · 30/10/2023 17:11

CoffeeCantata · 30/10/2023 15:52

OP - are they involved in criminal activity?

Not being facetious, but the way you describe them smacks very much of people who've made their money through crime (the hard and selfish attitudes, the ostentatious cars, disregard for anyone else's safety etc).

You say they inherited their money and have never worked?? The whole situation sounds bizarre.

No they haven’t.

However, they seem to glorify crime - forging insurance documents, driving to Europe in a Winnebago that they bought and didn’t even have a licence at the time to drive it.

OP posts:
Original poster
Mysteriousgirl2 · 30/10/2023 17:22

Kinneddar · 29/10/2023 22:30

They are incredibly powerful people. If they find out I did this, they might harm me or my DC. (They have done similar to someone in the past who crossed them

And it was at this point the thread totally jumped the shark.....

Perhaps your world is a bit small if you cannot comprehend that there are some really powerful people in the world and that their money can heavily influence situations.

In the past, someone got on the wrong side of them. They decided on an elaborate plan and set this innocent person up. Next thing I knew he was accused of rape and is now on the sex offenders register. He didn’t do it. If they found out that I was behind it, they would try to do something terrible.

OP posts:
Original poster
Mysteriousgirl2 · 30/10/2023 17:23

MummyShah369 · 30/10/2023 06:00

I think it’s really hard for you as you have had a childhood where you have seen luxury but now you are in their position you don’t have access to the same resources… I sympathise but others out there in a better or worse situation you just have to come to terms with things and do the best you can

I did not have a life of luxury. I was a girl in a house full of boys. Education was only for the boys. They got sent to boarding school, I didn’t. I had a really miserable upbringing.

OP posts: