In trouble, I grabbed the best room!

[Singletraveller]

I'm on holiday with a group of mates; they have partners and I dont. Last time we went away together the couple that arrived first at the cottage grabbed the best room, with no shame or negotiation! We all ended up joking that this time round we would race eachother for the best room...all a bit whacky races and jovial! Anyway, I got there well before anyone else for various travel related reasons, so grabbed the best room. Big with an ensuite. The other rooms were nice just a bit smaller...one didnt have an ensuite. Anyhow, one of the couples has kicked off - because Im single, I shouldn't have the biggest room apparently. Given they're all essentially nice rooms, this feels a bit shitty...should I have quietly taken a 'lesser' room just because I'm a solo traveller?? All so petty I know, but peed off at the sour atmosphere after all the joking about rooms in the run up.

Had this once. The single person in the double room got angry when we explained that the single duvet on the bed in our room wasn’t enough to cover both of us (it was cold at night).

That's entirely different - in OP's instance ALL of the rooms are double rooms. But one is nicer than the others. Why should OP, who is paying proportionately more, not have the nice room and an en suite.

Do only couples use a toilet and shower? This is her break, too

You paid the least per room so I think you were taking the piss.

But per person is not relevant unless they are staying in a hostel or all staying in one large room and paying price per person.

When we talk of price per person, we forget that person staying alone in a room is also getting more space per person and a bathroom which is not be shared unlike couples who share space and bathroom between 2 people.

Thats why when people travel, 2 people sharing one room can afford a better room versus a person staying alone.
If you share in a hotel room with a friend, you can both pay 75 each and afford a bigger room for £150 versus if you are staying alone, you may o ly afford a smaller or less nicer room at £100 per person.

In this scemario, they were all supposed to stay in individual rooms. So the price is per room. As she is travelling as single, her friends were nice to give her discount. But by taking the biggest room with ensuite, she did less nice thing to friends who were nice to offer her a good discount.

She got a discount less than 50%. She didnt say 25 or 30% so I am guessing less than 50% but still substantial.

So you are saying that OP is fated ALWAYS to have the least attractive room as long as she is travelling without a partner?

That doesn't seem very fair, does it?

What is to stop the group taking turns at the "good" room - Last time it was Couple 1, this time it is OP, next time it can be Couple 2. Start a rota.

Then she should pay full amount for room. If there were 5 room in the cottage and whole cottage was priced at 500. Op should pay 100 versus the couples paying 100 between a couple ( 50 per person) and not get any discount. All room had ensuite except for one. And all rooms are nice, this is the largest. She could have taken a smaller room with ensuite. Anyways, op always had the benefit of whole bathroom to herself.

No - she is paying the full amount for the room. She will be paying a single person supplement because she is the only one in double room.

The others aren't subsidising her. She is enabling them to rent a more attractive place than they would otherwise for what they are paying. This benefits all.

If they thought that she should take the smallest room then that should have been made clear at the outset when everyone was paying £"however much", with none of this "first one there gets to pick their room" business.

Totally agree with you, @Theemeperorsnewclothes

There is such a bias against single people, and couples automatically assume they should get the largest / best of everything. It gets tiresome.

Also a pp said this: When we talk of price per person, we forget that person staying alone in a room is also getting more space per person and a bathroom which is not be shared unlike couples who share space and bathroom between 2 people.

My response to that is: Presumably they are sharing space and a bathroom because they want to. If they would prefer to be single, or prefer to book one room apiece instead of a shared room, what is stopping them??? Holding out "ooh, they have to SHARE a room..." as though it's not a voluntary choice, is just bullshit. And more bias toward the "plight" of those poor, poor hard-done-by couples.

No, I don't think she's paying full price for a room, as she mentions a discount overall but more pp.

Probably something like £75 for a room, while other couples pay £100 per room.

But the couples occupy twice the communal space - sitting room, kitchen etc.

So say it’s a 3 bedroom house, and costs, say, £600 and is shared between 5 people 2 couples and a single person.

That’s £200 per bedroom. Clearly costs the single person a lot more. But if you account for all the shared spaces as well, it might be fairer to say

Divide half the rent per room - therefore £100 each room and the other half per person. Therefore £60 each.

So a single person would pay £160 and each couple would pay £220 per couple ie £110 each person.

Therefore each couple pays £220 (440 total) and the single person pays £160.

It’s still more than each individual in each couple pays but it’s a bit fairer and recognised that the couples occupy double the communal spaces.

I don't understand all this justifying about the relative cost per cubic foot of space per room per person. Presumably the couples have all paid the same amount but have got different sized rooms, so surely that is unfair on for some of them too? I do now have a picture of people walking round holiday bedrooms with their arms out making sure they use all the space they've paid for!

But anyway, why is the biggest automatically assumed to be the best? The biggest room might be cold, or have a rubbish view, or a smaller bed.

If they thought that she should take the smallest room then that should have been made clear at the outset when everyone was paying £"however much", with none of this "first one there gets to pick their room" business.

It would have been so much simpler if they'd said "Singletraveller can pay less for her room, as she's on her own, and also, as her room only needs to accommodate one person, she'll have the smallest room, won't she?"

That way, OP could either have agreed or otherwise protested that she wanted one of the bigger rooms - and it isn't her fault that she doesn't have a partner to share it with. Then the others could have said "OK, then, we'll price it equally per bedroom instead - then it's just the luck of the draw as to who ends up with which room."

But she has paid the most preportionally.

Think of it this way, if 5 singles had gone and one couple the 5 singles have to pay £100 for their room and the couple only has to pay £100 for their room with two people in it? No, the couple would be charged £100 each like everyone else. So why is it different when the proportions are swapped?

I've had this before with more singles than couples and we pay per head, split down the cost of the hire. That's just how we split it in my group.

One time I took the best bedroom, but I had paid far more than everyone else due to other circumstances.

If there are 7 people going, then it should be split into 7. It shouldn't be split into 8 just because there is a spare bit of bed in the OPs bedroom. There are 7 people in the group, split by 7. Don't penalise her because she has a bit of spare bed that isn't filled. If you really want that extra 1/8th, invite a couple.

They are cheeky fuckers.

I don't think anyone suggested or expected that OP would have the smallest one, but grabbing the biggest and best one when she has paid less for it than the others was unreasonable.

Why?

She hasn't paid less for her personal sleeping space than anyone else; she has paid more.

Last time the group went away, one of the couples got first choice of rooms as they were first there - and the group went along with this. Presumably if either couple had got there first they would have picked the room they wanted, even if they had been the "lucky" couple last time - they'd all agreed "first come, first choice".

This time OP was first there, and she chose a room. No-one is sleeping 2 to a single bed, no-one is sleeping on a pull-out sofa - they are all perfectly decent double rooms. It's just that one doesn't have an en-suite - so why should OP be the one not to enjoy this little luxury?

She has as much right to a lovely comfortable room as anyone else. I'm sure if she had been last there, and the other two couples have chosen the two "best" rooms, she would have accepted it as the luck of the draw.

You are quite reactive to understand what I said. Little bit of objective and logical thinking will help than such emotional reactions.

I am not talking about last time. I agreed with her that she only followed 'first come first serve' rule of the group until she disclosed she got less than 50% discount.

Not sure if your reaction is because you have had bad experience of travelling as a single in a group, but keeping our own projections aside, a couple is able to afford a bigger room because there are 2 people sharing a room and can split the cost of a bigger room, this argument of payment per person is pretty childish. When you stay in a hotel alone, you pay more per person than if you were to share a room with another person whether that person is your partner or another single person.

Some posters have made this a matter of single versus couple. If you feel you are being treated unfairly by your couple friends, why travel with them. Travelling should be for having a good time.

Often the only single person ends up on a fold out bed or in a cupboard or something so can't really blame you for bagsying a good room but it does sound like your group needs an actual system.

But she wasn't getting a folded bed, she was getting a decent room to herself. In fact, she said all rooms were good and had ensuite except for one. Op chose the biggest room with ensuite.

Single people who get a folded bed should pay substantially less or not travel with such people who treat them with afterthought.
I agree with you that their allocation system needs reviewing.

On the basis of a lot of these arguments, would you expect a single person on holiday with a family, to take the big room, leaving the family of perhaps 3 or 4 to go into a smaller room?

To be honest, it seems logical that larger groups (ie couples in this case) get the bigger room.

If a couple have paid more in total than the single person (which is the case here) then it seems more likely one of the couples should have the bigger room.

To be honest, if people aren’t going to be sensible and go on large rooms for couples, then picking out of the hat ina dance seems fairer so it’s totally random.

Whatever happened to simply being generous and saying ‘you choose’? To be honest, if you’re single and doing stuff with couples, it’s simply practical for the couples to have the larger space. Equally, couples without kids away with families….it seems practical that the families have the bigger space or the room with the en-suite.

Single people often do get a rough deal….the reality is that holidaying as a single often attracts a supplement and the per-person price is higher. It’s one of those things. Singles in self catering places often find themselves in the less good rooms…because often the smaller rooms aren’t the best ones. But it seems pretty odd to take the biggest room if there are less of you.

Everyone needs to be considerate of each other. Couples need to be aware th8ngs aren’t always easy for singles….make sure bills etc are spit per person and not per room or per family etc. Likewise singles need to be aware that couples do take up more space.

If anyone can’t cope with being tolerant and considering others, they should only go on holiday with people in the same situation as themselves. Either couples, couples without kids or families can have chips on their shoulders and determined to make a point and demand their ‘rights’ over a (practically reasonable) assumption that larger groups get bigger rooms. But anyone on a group holiday who isn’t willing to say ‘you choose’ and acceeept sometimes they will spend more than their fair share or get the worst deal in terms of clearing up, or access to facilities, is better not going on group holidays. Expect to receive less than your fair shae and dont be worried by it …
it’s the best way to enjoy a group holiday. Pettiness is a recipe for disaster….and not seeing that demanding ‘your rights’ is petty shows a lack of awareness of group activity which means it’s best avoided by some people.

Would those. Who think OP is right, equally say a family of 4 should go into a small room and let the single person have the big en-suite room if she go to the accommodation first?

The thing is,in properties, aren’t are all rooms equal. Some are bigger and some are nicer or have nicer facilities. Someone has to have the lesser rooms. Best thing is to have a system. It can be a ballot but to be honest, it usually doesn’t make sense…you might have a family of 4 and a single person. It just doesn’t make sense for the family of 4 to squeeze into a small room.

If all the rooms in OPs case are actual equal size and almost all have en-suites, then her taking the room she did spdoesnt sound too bad. But the size of rooms makes a difference. Smaller room is better for smaller number of people.

But as said above, if you can’t cope with having less than ‘the average’ or paying more than exactly your share (and quite how that’s calculated is often disputed anyway) then don’t go on group hols.

Let the families who need more space pay for two of the moderate rooms, not expect others to automatically sacrifice the larger room to them.

It just doesn’t make sense for the family of 4 to squeeze into a small room.

Nobody is asking many people to squeeze into a "small" room.

The smallest room is perfectly adequate for two people. it is a double room. It may not be as large as the other double rooms, but it is a double room. It is described as "just a bit smaller" than the room OP chose. We aren't talking a broom cupboard here.

However, it lacks an en suite, and I suspect that this is what is causing the problem. I'm willing to bet that the couple kicking off about it is the couple in the room which does not have an en suite. Had they got there second, they would have "bagsied" the second en suite room and been quite content.

Just as a matter of interest @Singletraveller , did they get the best room last time? I know it has no bearing, but I'm just wondering.

Whoever booked it should get the best room, imho. Don't blame you for going for it if it was a free-for-all. The person(s) who kicked off is a rudey. They should be made to take the room that isn't en suite! 😉

@Singletraveller - I’ve been on trips as the solo one and it’s all got complicated, but my most recent trip me and my partner were the only one in a couple. We all paid per head. 2 friends took bunk beds in one room, me and my partner were given the double room, and 1 friend took the double sofa bed in the living room.

Personally I found this very unfair on the others (especially the one who took the sofa bed - the other 2 were clear they didn’t want to share a bed! ). And so if you were on my trip I’d have gladly given you the biggest room! I’m assuming you wouldn’t stop people using your en suite! So I think you’re totally great, but you didn’t need to buy the alcohol! I’m sure they are just glad to have you there and really nobody wants to hang out with ‘Only couples’ for reasons such as them feeling entitled to have the ‘best room’

You've paid a bit less and there's only one of you - IMO it's unfair and a bit cheeky that you get the biggest and best room.

Not as bad as a good friend who bagsied the biggest double room to herself and expected one of the couples to go in a twin room. Not a friend anymore after that holiday (was the start of a lot of awful behaviour)

Sounds like you've sorted it all now anyway