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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Did you spend your twenties travelling, or building a career, or having kids or

168 replies

Threebiscuitsandacupoftea · 25/10/2023 21:10

just keeping your head above water?

Interested in how people spent their twenties. And what are you focusing on now, in comparison?

Due to ill health, mine were basically all on the struggle bus Grin I mean, yes I did have a fair amount of fun thank goodness, but never travelled as too expensive. Never managed to do anything of note.

I'm in better health now as I approach 40 compared to young adulthood, and would like to carve out a little bit of a career for myself. Have a few places I'd love to visit if it is possible one day.

What about you?

OP posts:
anon0007 · 25/10/2023 21:36

Travelled, partied my arse off, got married and had kids.

YellowBrickRoadWithPotholes · 25/10/2023 21:37

Graduated with a masters, emigrated to U.K./London, started a well paid job which gave me a disposable income that meant I could party very hard, travel, and buy my own flat in central London before I was 30. Awesome decade, would not change a thing. It was just pure fun. It was also the 90s.

SittingOnTheChair · 25/10/2023 21:37

My son was 3 yrs old when I hit my 20's.

Got my career by the time I was 22. Did very well.

Now in my 40's and I'm travelling and having fun.

MaryShelley1818 · 25/10/2023 21:41

Drinking, partying, seeing the world and having fun! First marriage at 29yrs. Then first degree in my 30's, divorce, first child at 39, second marriage at 40, second child at 42, second degree at 45 and just starting new career.
Literally wouldn't change a thing!

Tohaveandtohold · 25/10/2023 21:43

Finished first degree at 21, migrated and still live here now (so not travelling per se), married at 23, DC1 at 24, masters between 25 & 26, beginning of career, bought a house at 29, DC2 at 30, career again after Mat leave.
Travelling for fun and enjoying life has been in my 30s because we spent my 20s paying for education, visa fees, childcare, saving for a house, that we had nothing left for fun travelling, only went abroad to visit family.

Scottishskifun · 25/10/2023 21:45

Uni, travelling and partying early 20s, mid twenties met DH building a career and doing shorter travel trips (3ish weeks) til we bought a house at 27 married 29. First child 32, second at 35.
I don't think I would change it had a amazing time and looking forward to more travel once children are old enough.

Twobigsapphires · 25/10/2023 21:46

Somehow managed to do all three. Married at 19. Went travelling for 18th months after graduation. Landed a great job and then had first dc at 25, second at 26. Got promoted at 28 then had final dc at 29. Looking back I have no idea how I managed it all and those years went by in a flash!

Youcancallmeirrelevant · 25/10/2023 21:46

Career and kids

carbon60 · 25/10/2023 21:47

Working hard, buying motorbikes, drinking , having fun, going to festivals and bike rallies.

Isis1981uk · 25/10/2023 21:51

A bit of everything really! Began my career, then took a year off travelling/working on a working holiday visa, then continued building my career, topped off with getting married and having my first baby at 29.

Iactuallydidit · 25/10/2023 21:53

Building my career, partying, a bit of travelling, making a few stupid mistakes that I cringe at now (involving partying, recreational drugs, silly mistakes and being a d at work!! 30’s married, raising young kids, being very sensible…feel I got a lot out of my system in my 20’s. I would like to do more travelling though when the kids are older.

minipie · 25/10/2023 22:02

Worked worked and worked some more. Also bought a flat, got married. Captain Sensible basically. Like a PP the career is now non existent due to being incompatible with DC so wish I’d worked less hard and gone out dancing more.

nopenotforme · 25/10/2023 22:02

Drinking and partying, had the best time. Now have a solid career and a child. Don't regret my twenties but do sometimes feel I'm about 7-10 years behind where I should be mortgage wise. A sensible balance would have been perfect - lots of fun is still essential though :)

PinkRoses1245 · 25/10/2023 22:03

A mix of career, travels, living abroad, partying and having fun

SheerLucks · 25/10/2023 22:03

Daveismyhero · 25/10/2023 21:17

I travelled for the first half and built my career for the second half. In my 30s now and just starting my family

Sounds like the right way to me!

NoraLuka · 25/10/2023 22:04

Got married straight after uni to an older guy from a completely different culture (no, love is not enough!), moved countries, had the DDs, did another degree with distance learning because I was worried about never having a career, did a few part time jobs, left ExH. Looking back my guardian angel must have been watching me like the one in the meme. Now in my 40s and in a relationship I’m not sure about but happy anyway.

Did you spend your twenties travelling, or building a career, or having kids or
Orangetattoo · 25/10/2023 22:05

Messed around and wasted time. Now early thirties and scrabbling to catch up. Still a way to go Blush
Lockdown was the kick up the bum I needed.

mondaytosunday · 25/10/2023 22:07

Finishing uni, which I did last two years in Paris. Then moved to London, where I didn't know anyone and started my career, learned to drive, bought a property, sold it bought another. Just basically figured out how to be an adult and be responsible. No big romances - ended my first serious one at 21 and then had a dry patch for quite a few years (kissed a few frogs along the way though). That was pretty much my 20s!

museumum · 25/10/2023 22:07

post graduate education and early intense work experience in London (badly paid so living in crazy flat shares). it paid off. But I didn’t meet dh till I left London to return “home” in the north and I’m glad I didn’t fall in love with somebody in the SE (although at the time I was lovely and felt terribly single).

Heatherbell1978 · 25/10/2023 22:11

Travelling, building a career, spending/wasting money, got on the property ladder, spent 4 years with a dick of a boyfriend and then a glorious few years getting over him with lots of lovely men. I peaked in my late 20s/early 30s then the marriage and kids era started when I hit 35.

DaisyWaldron · 25/10/2023 22:16

There was a lot of studying/university time - three years of undergraduate degree plus a year as a students Union sabbatical officer, 2 years of study, 2 years of on the job training, another year of studying, a new job then it all went to pot and I spent the rest of the decade in a minimum wage job and then had babies in my thirties.

Cyclistmumgrandma · 25/10/2023 22:16

Moved abroad, 5000 miles and 8 hour time difference from home. Had first child and had difficulties with birth with no family support (not their fault, we were 5000 miles away!). Then moved back to UK, all in my 20's.

hulawoop · 25/10/2023 22:19

As someone in their early 20s I’m so reassured to see a mix here, no one right or wrong way it just goes to show

yeekls · 25/10/2023 22:20

Uni, marriage, babies (before 25), career, postgrad, bought a house at 30. Very busy, at times hard, but also very fun decade.

Enjoying my 30s feeling very settled, content, enjoying my (now older) family, and getting to see more of the world now we are financially comfortable. Wouldn't change a thing.

SíDoMhamóí · 25/10/2023 22:30

20s working. 30s kids. 40s career. I think I've worked too much but I like it too