Need some reassurance that I'm not crazy...

[ScaredMamaLondon]

Hello,
I am a Jewish mum of two small children.
I think I'm posting on here to get a reassurance that there are some good people in this world. I am terrified to be openly Jewish in this country at the moment and I am terrified for my children's future here. This week I was told by a nanny agency 'it will be very difficult to get a nanny to work for a jewish family'. The security patrolling makes me feel nauseous; my neighbour's son attends a jewish school and was kicked on the bus for his obviously jewish school uniform. We aren't obviously Jewish 'looking' - we are not religious but yet I don't feel at all safe. The pro-Palestinian rally today threw up pictures of burning stars of davids (the antizionism isn't antisemitism thing is basically an excuse for saying what you like about jews and getting away with it). Red paint splattered over local jewish primary schools (again if it's not antisemitism, what do we have to do with it) and on top of all of this, the sinking, dismal feeling that in Israel, the only place as a Jew I would imagine feeling safe, 1300+ civilians were massacred in their beds/kidnapped/gang raped/worse.

I feel sick. I feel we are utterly hated here and unsafe there.

When I see videos of TFL tube drivers joining in with palestinian chants as if its a football anthem and flags of Jihad being waved in London I do wonder if I've missed something here. At the recent vigil for the Israeli victims people stood in silence. Singing. Crying. Praying for peace. And today I witness the complete opposite. I didn't see one mention of peace. I only saw hatred.

Half my family are NHS doctors and surgeons. Teachers. Proud of our Jewishness and proud of our Britishness. Why is it as a Jewish person in the UK i feel so utterly isolated and depressed? Many clients and non jewish friends have sent wonderful messages of support so perhaps it is just the vocal minority but it's a scary one nonetheless. AIBU in thinking that life is completely terrifying right now?

I don't understand what's going on but please accept love and hugs from me and probably Mumsnet as a whole.

The situation in the Middle East has been stirred up by some very accomplished spoon wielders. Why people over here feel the need to act like swine is beyond me.

It's crazy - people are easily led.

It breaks my heart that you feel like this, OP, and that I can’t say that that I think that your fears are completely unfounded. I grew up with Jewish friends and have never considered Jewish people to be anything other than British people who happen to have a different religion. I’ve been hugely shocked and sickened over the last few years to see the increasing evidence that antisemitism never went away.

I don’t think it’s fair that Jewish people are expected to distance themselves from the Israeli government and put that disclosure in front of everything. You are entitled to hold your own views without your existence being threatened. And unlike many groups who claim that their very existence is threatened with little justification, it has happened before. It is crashingly stupid not to empathise with your fear that history could repeat itself.

But you asked for reassurance that not everyone is prepared to ignore, excuse or condone antisemitism, and not everyone sees you as the enemy. They don’t. There is love, and respect, and solidarity out here. I hope that this time passes quickly and that you and your family are safe, and feel safe again 💐

I really feel for Jewish people in the uk and all over. It won't solve anything to hurt and intimidated Jewish civilians here. I do unfortunately think that recent events have stirred up anti semitic hate. Which is unacceptable. I'm sorry you de scared. It's awful to think we could be getting to a pre ww2 place where people are this open in hatred.

But I think you are wrong to then assume everyone who is supporting hates Jewish people and to equate anti zionism with anti senitism.

While the actions of hamas are disgusting I don't think you can seriously compare their postage taking to the actions (genocide) of Israel over years.

Can i just ask all the posters whose " friends" are protesting/supporting the Free Palestine thing or have joined marches themselves, why did the beheading of babies and rapes of women not compel you or your friends to march ? You love a good ol march against bad governments don't you? But not the Palestinian government right? Asking for a "friend".

I'm so sorry you're being made to feel like this.
Not everyone sees individuals as Jewish people or as a homogeneous lump and hates them.

As it should be. 👏

Agree. I hate being made to feel bad/wrong for supporting the plight of the Palestinian people.

I am not Jewish - i am disgusted that your community feels threatened in this / or any country in 2023.
There is nothing i can do to help you but i want you to know i really care and if its any comfort there is not one person i know that would behave in such an offensive way .
I am ashamed with what is happening , the world has a very strange vibe at the moment , i hope there are better times to come.

I'm sorry you feel like this. I'm sorry the world is making you feel like this.

I've worked as a nanny and I'm not Jewish. I'd happily work for a Jewish family can't think of any nannies I know who would have a problem with it. It's disgusting you were told it would be a problem

Just my opinion but I actually think you should have high expectations of the non-Jewish population in the UK. I think we should all speak up loud and vigorously against antisemitism whenever and wherever it tries to creep out, which it does with sickening regularity and under many guises.

One thing that really struck me just after the Hamas atrocity happened was that before the bodies had even been counted in Israel, let alone buried and mourned, we were watching big crowds out on the UK streets waving their 'Free Palestine' flags. It seemed tone-deaf at best. Personally I had not even begun to process the horror of the stories coming out of Israel at that point, and I wondered where were the demonstrators (not just Jewish) showing solidarity with the Israeli victims and shaming Hamas.

This whole conflict seems to attract people who take a binary, simplistic view on moral questions - people who don't see that it is quite possible to criticise the Netanyahu government while supporting Israel's right to exist and defend itself, or be prepared to condemn Hamas without reservation while insisting that the human rights of Palestinian civilians are prioritised in any counter attack against Hamas and its supporters in other countries.

I completely agree with this

I feel for you. People ripping down the pictures of hostages (some children) in London shocked me. The Israeli govt are awful and rightfully get criticised. But Hamas are the government of Gaza and have an appalling human rights record on their own people. Egypt lock their border with Gaza because of Hamas. Qatar, Iran and Turkey harbour the Hamas leadership. It isn't all down to Israel.

@Burnoutwhat I don't think anyone is making you feel bad about the plight of palestinians. if you think that's the point i was making i wasn't.
I merely asked why pro palestinian marches can't be about palestinian leadership...ever. They have to be so anti Israel and in the case of about 20% of the people there/chants this then turns into utterly objective anti-jewish slurs, words, chants, posters and ill feeling. It is a disgrace.
I don't know where 'feeling bad' for palestinian children comes in. Why do you/anyone feel the need to make this so binary? Today there was a vigil for Israelis asking for the 200+ hostages back and mourning the murder of so many babies/children/young people. There was no anti muslim hate. There was no screaming. There was no burning flags. The plight of the Palestinian children was mentioned several times in speeches. The only singing was a song for peace.
And you know what broke the silence? Several cars surrounding trafalgar square with people shouting 'free free Palestine. Fuck you Jews'. Met police obviously utterly useless.
But there you go. No one feels bad about your feeling for Palestinian civilians. Most jews agree. All Jews want is some recognition for their own horrific trauma over the past two weeks which many people seem to have oddly neglected. I'll rephrase that. It isn't odd. There's a lot of people in this country very very comfortable with a touch of Jew hate.

@Tomatina You are so right. I think that's what blew my mind. Israel had not even done anything besides figure out how many people had been murdered/injured/gang raped/beheaded and within a few hours there are Pro Palestinian rallies cheering, jeering and handing out sweets to their kids.
Honestly, I'm pretty left wing. As I said above I think anyone is better for the (majority secular/left wing) country that is Israel. But oh my goodness this has nothing to do with Bibi Netanyahu. You are kidding yourselves if you think that's why people are jeering the deaths of Israelis outside the Israeli embassy the NIGHT of these attacks. They just hate Jews. One Jewish death is one too few for them.
And for anyone who seems to think an Israeli left wing government would be responding all too differently - the whole country is lost at the idea their security proved to be utterly useless and Hamas isn't suddenly going to change its charter - calling for the international genocide of all Jews - if the Israelis suddenly had a more tolerant prime minister. Come on! There are just no negotiations to be had. How do you negotiate with someone who wants all your people dead?! What's worrying Israel is a democracy, there will be a new leader very very soon with a new tack. But Hamas isn't going anywhere.

Anyway, this wasn't meant to be a rant about the Middle East. It was more about how shocked I am when it spills into this country and people wave jihadi flags and talk about throwing jews into the bin. Our government is useless, TFL are useless, the London is mayor is useless. Losing faith, but you all have helped me restore it through your very kind and supportive words. xx

It’s awful that anyone has to be scared for their safety and that of their family, anywhere. I can’t think of any nationality or religion, or it’s followers, that I hate or even mildly dislike. I do hate violence, war and cruelty. I really think if all the men in the Middle East could be locked up for a month the woman would get it all sorted, fairly and sensibly. Pity that can’t happen.

I am so sorry that this is happening to you. We are standing next to you in support xx

Very very sorry you're going through this OP. Many of us support the Jewish community 100% - including the right of Israel to defend its borders against constant terrorist onslaught.

Just posting in solidarity OP.

Several cars surrounding trafalgar square with people shouting 'free free Palestine. Fuck you Jews'. Met police obviously utterly useless.

Please try to remember though that this is a small minority of vile people, the vast majority would never think like this an would denounce this behaviour. Unfortunately a vigil for the Jewish hostages is going to attract a few disgusting anti-Semitic people, same as a feminist march will attract a few rabid TRA types.

Not proposing to understand how you must be feeling at the moment at all but please don’t think this is how the general public think or feel. Everyone I’ve spoken to about it (all non-Jewish, white Brits) think that the Hamas terrorist attack was an atrocity.

It's always the innocent people that suffer in wars

Just to say thank you to you all. After seeing the hate in the streets and on social media I;ve been on the verge of tears for days. This has made me think there are some really good people in the world. Maybe we just keep hearing from the violent, loud minority. xx

I'm so sorry that you are feeling like this.

Just to reassure you on one of your points; I am a nanny. I have been a nanny for over 25 years and I know and have known LOTS of nannies. I can tell you that I honestly and truly believe that not one of those nannies would ever, ever refuse to work for a Jewish family. The agency that told you that none of their registered nannies would work for you are talking the biggest load of crap. It would be good to know which agency it was!

Sending so much love.

the Marches and acts of solidarity are strategic. They are organized activism - the goal (of the organisers) is to put pressure of the EU, the Uk and the US governments to stop clapping on the Israeli authorities as they blatantly disregard international law. There is little support for Hamas - they aren’t even considered a government by western leaders - they are designated a terrorist group.

i 100% agree with you. Some People are clearly behaving this way and attacking Jews. And this is completely wrong and that seems to be a point that we can all agree on. However when the OP sees an out pouring of support for ordinary Palestinian citizens or criticism of the Israeli government she seems too see this as an out pouring of hate against the Jewish people and this is not the case at all.

However when the OP sees an out pouring of support for ordinary Palestinian citizens or criticism of the Israeli government she seems too see this as an out pouring of hate against the Jewish people and this is not the case at all.

That is because it is always accompanied by an outpouring of hatred against Jewish people. Even if those demonstrating aren't expressing hatred of Jews, others piggyback their hatred onto it.