Page 8 | Friend lying about tv appearance.

KatKoot · 2023-10-20T21:54:43+00:00

A friend of mine has recently told me (& put on Facebook) that they were going to be a contestant on a popular quiz show However when I checked online to see if I could be part of the audience the website said the show had been recorded in March and will be on tv in 2024. WIBU to call this friend out on their lie or is it possible they’re telling the truth & audience website is incorrect.

koalaknickers · 21/10/2023 13:19

I don't drive. I had a provisional licence for a while and I could only be in the car with a driver who had the full licence. Never alone.

So I would say "I don't drive, but I am learning".

Someone saying they can drive if they are still learning and haven't passed their test is misleading, I feel.

I agree with the OP here.

Wouldyouguess · 21/10/2023 13:25

I think if you like them @KatKoot Id speak to them.
I think people who lie often do it to fit in better, but obviously people catch up and actually the end effect is the opposite from intended. If the friend lies to be more like everyone else, Id either speak to them, or if you like her and don't want to have that chat which can be awkward, then just shut the gossiping down. At the end of the day, does it really matter what liense did she have if she was not actually driving any of you around and only said so because off of the mean girls' have nice cars and drive and she wanted to match?

margotrose · 21/10/2023 13:33

People lie for all sorts of reasons - to fit in, because they're embarrassed or ashamed, because they don't want to go explain the truth to everyone they meet etc.

If her behaviour bothers you then just step away from the friendship rather than trying to catch her out all the time.

lavenderlou · 21/10/2023 13:38

Sounds like the friend is lying but I'm not sure there's anything to be gained by calling them out on it. Seems a strange lie as presumably people will notice when she never actually appears on an episode.

Original poster

KatKoot · 21/10/2023 13:38

I’m not really trying to catch her out. I hope she isn’t lying. But others in group keep talking about her lies and not sure what to do. This person is funny, witty & generous however the lies are becoming too much. She criticised my driving when I gave her a lift. I jokingly said ‘well you drive then’ & they said they were a brilliant driver just didn’t have a car at the moment but used to have one. When we joined a casino they showed their licence as id but it was only a provisional.

OP posts:

margotrose · 21/10/2023 13:42

She criticised my driving when I gave her a lift. I jokingly said ‘well you drive then’ & they said they were a brilliant driver just didn’t have a car at the moment but used to have one.

But that doesn't mean she has a license, she's just saying she's a good driver

Blackandwhitemakesgrey · 21/10/2023 13:43

KatKoot · 20/10/2023 23:10

I think they are a compulsive liar. I’ve always tried to be kind & help them out but it’s going too far now.

Why are you referring to her as your ‘friend’?

And why do you want to be in the audience to watch someone you clearly dislike?

Original poster

KatKoot · 21/10/2023 13:44

I don’t dislike this person. I actually like them but I don’t like the lies.

OP posts:

LIZS · 21/10/2023 13:44

So she lies to impress? If you want to remain friends either you accept whatever she says with a pinch of salt and move the conversation on or continue to double check to catch her out, wasting your time and energy. Or you tell her bluntly you know and distance yourself. You cannot control what others think. What type of group is it?

Original poster

KatKoot · 21/10/2023 13:46

It’s a book club. But we don’t spend much time discussing books.

OP posts:

TurquoiseMermaid · 21/10/2023 13:50

Blackandwhitemakesgrey · 21/10/2023 13:43

Why are you referring to her as your ‘friend’?

And why do you want to be in the audience to watch someone you clearly dislike?

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I really don't understand this very MN thing that you either have to uncritically adore someone and find them perfect, or they're a terrible person/you obviously secretly hate them and should LTB/go NC.

Most people have flaws, it's reasonable to love/like someone but be bothered by their flaws. And most people put up with their friends because realistically it's hard to make new friends once you're above say 20s (except if you have a baby), and most people don't dump friends unless they've done something completely beyond the pale. Only on MN is any criticism of complaint met with "LTB/go NC" and "you obviously don't like them."

It really makes me wonder if most people on MN actually has relationships in reality.

PuppyMonkey · 21/10/2023 13:52

Did you offer to be her Phone a Friend, OP?

Dontneedtopleaseanyone · 21/10/2023 13:58

I think the trouble with liars is that you can never believe anything they say even if it's true. I have an acquaintance who I'd have loved to develop a friendship with, but she lied about her career (said she had spent time as deputy head of a school but I found out that she had in fact been a teaching assistant). She still talks about her time when she was deputy head and I cringe because I know it isn't true. There were many other lies too and the thing is that I now wouldn't believe anything she said.

It is such a shame for them and there are obviously deep rooted issues. I wouldnt have cared what her occupation was I'd have been a friend to her all the same.

Sorry I made that all about my story but I guess I'm saying to you that I can see why you try to find out if itis true or not.

Original poster

KatKoot · 21/10/2023 14:19

Very true @Dontneedtopleaseanyone and thank you for your input.

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Original poster

KatKoot · 21/10/2023 14:21

TurquoiseMermaid · 21/10/2023 13:50

I really don't understand this very MN thing that you either have to uncritically adore someone and find them perfect, or they're a terrible person/you obviously secretly hate them and should LTB/go NC.

Most people have flaws, it's reasonable to love/like someone but be bothered by their flaws. And most people put up with their friends because realistically it's hard to make new friends once you're above say 20s (except if you have a baby), and most people don't dump friends unless they've done something completely beyond the pale. Only on MN is any criticism of complaint met with "LTB/go NC" and "you obviously don't like them."

It really makes me wonder if most people on MN actually has relationships in reality.

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Exactly @TurquoiseMermaid everyone has flaws I’m far from perfect. But just worried they’ve gone to far with this lie!

OP posts:

Original poster

KatKoot · 21/10/2023 14:26

PuppyMonkey · 21/10/2023 13:52

Did you offer to be her Phone a Friend, OP?

Lol I would have! We’re all good at general knowledge in our group. When she was asked who her ‘phone a friend’ was she said ‘Lizzie’, a name they’ve never mentioned before. They said Lizzie didn’t know the answer anyway.

OP posts:

Booksandwine80 · 21/10/2023 14:58

Fuck me 🤣get a life

Original poster

KatKoot · 21/10/2023 15:03

Booksandwine80 · 21/10/2023 14:58

Fuck me 🤣get a life

Why don’t you get a life instead of posting useless comments.

OP posts:

TiredMamOfTwo · 21/10/2023 15:10

Just watch it when the new series comes out that way you'll know.

Blackandwhitemakesgrey · 21/10/2023 15:25

TurquoiseMermaid · 21/10/2023 13:50

I really don't understand this very MN thing that you either have to uncritically adore someone and find them perfect, or they're a terrible person/you obviously secretly hate them and should LTB/go NC.

Most people have flaws, it's reasonable to love/like someone but be bothered by their flaws. And most people put up with their friends because realistically it's hard to make new friends once you're above say 20s (except if you have a baby), and most people don't dump friends unless they've done something completely beyond the pale. Only on MN is any criticism of complaint met with "LTB/go NC" and "you obviously don't like them."

It really makes me wonder if most people on MN actually has relationships in reality.

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It really isn't usual to call a friend a compulsive liar nor is usual to want to spend time with people who they call compulsive liars. The OP refers to others in the group as 'mean girls' and continues to say she knows them through a book club but they don't really discuss books. Thereby it is a group of supposed friends meeting up for a chat.

The OP does not know this person well or she would know whether she can drive or not and certainly wouldn't be looking over the person's shoulder to see what ID she had. Even if she happened to see the person's ID why would she store this information up to use it to prove her point that the person tells lies.

She checked up on the 'friends' story by looking at filming times and locations under the guise of wanting to be in the audience. If the 'friend' had wanted the OP in the audience, she would have asked her to accompany her. Again the OP is being disingenuous unless she makes it a habit of gatecrashing?

The OP is not this person's friend.

Original poster

KatKoot · 21/10/2023 15:30

TiredMamOfTwo · 21/10/2023 15:10

Just watch it when the new series comes out that way you'll know.

Will do. It’s not out til 2024 so quite a long wait!

OP posts:

WomanStanleyWoman2 · 21/10/2023 23:45

YesThatsATurdOnTheRug · 21/10/2023 11:36

The irony 😂you've never read such over dramatic nonsense, calm down!

I don't think that's an entirely factual reflection of my post, just because I called out the number of really overdone nasty posts. Honestly, supporting bullying isn't kind. OP really did not deserve the pile on.

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You described it as “absolutely frightening viscousness”. If that’s not over the top nonsense, I don’t know what is.

Judecb · 22/10/2023 17:38

Many shows are recorded many months in advance, and it's not unusual for guests and audience members to be asked not to talk about it until nearer the transmission date.

TheRealHousewife · 22/10/2023 18:22

You don’t sound a very nice friend!

Missingpop · 22/10/2023 18:34

Your not very nice are you? What have you got to achieve to out her? Why did you go snooping around trying to catch her out to try to prove she was lying? Are you jealous of her or something or are you just that type of person who just has to piss on everyone’s parade?