Called aside in the office today...

[whatty]

I work in London in a hub office (many businesses under common ownership using the same space) in a senior role (I am female in my 40s). It is a hot desking set up- sit where you like when you come in. Some areas in the office have music playing & some don't (some context!).

At the end of my day today, a senior male colleague (50s) from another business asked to have a word with me. I have met him a few times at sessions where the businesses have been collaborating/ doing leadership workshops. He didn't remember me, so introduced himself.

He then proceeded to tell me that as I had been on calls all day (11.30-6.30 with a short lunch break) that I had been distracting people around me, and "many" people (from his area of the business) had reached out to him mention that they had found me distracting. For info- I had a headset on, and was working with colleagues on budget documentation & talking to my team re: work they were tackling.

He recommended that I use a pod/ room in future if I was going to be on lots of calls. I questioned whether there was a policy re: working in silence/ being a silent space- and he admitted that it was just different approaches to working, and that the team he works in tends to avoid being on calls in the open plan. He then said he hoped that this conversation would be taken in the way in which it was intended. I was confused to be honest- so I said it wasn't clear how it was meant. But that I'd consider his feedback.

When we left the room where we had his conversation, it was clear that those from his business around me were all aware that I was being "pulled aside".

I was livid if I'm being honest- and upset too. I am really busy at work, have been doing long hours, and felt that he had no right to tell me what to do in a shared office space. I accept that I am tired and emotional though, so perhaps should just leave it and move on. However- I also feel like he wouldn't have had that conversation with me if I was male. And that I wouldn't be unreasonable to pull him aside/ talk to him when I next encounter him with some measured feedback of my own.

What do you think? Would I be unreasonable to stew on this- and think up some direct home truths? Or should I keep quiet in the office and on the feedback front. TIA for any guidance you can offer!

I absolutely hate background music. It's like a persistent fly buzzing in my head and there's no way I could concentrate with it on. At least there is a clear and professional reason for someone being on the phone. Not a problem for me.

I can't stand background music. Or rather, I perhaps like it too much. It makes it impossible for me to concentrate on my work.

I haven’t been in a shared workspace but have worked in open plan environments before. Even pre-Covid, it was the norm to use one of the available quiet rooms for lengthy calls (and ‘lengthy’ was usually 30 mins plus).

Having someone conduct a several-hours-long call in your immediate vicinity can be extremely distracting and it sounds as though it is easily avoidable in this particular space.

Can’t understand why anyone would be on the OP’s side here.

Well done OP for taking on board the feedback. Bear in mind that from your colleague’s perspective this was no doubt a difficult conversation to broach (I certainly don’t envy him!) but it had to be done if the noise was disturbing multiple people.

There’s no point being in the office if all you’re going to do is call people who aren’t there. The office should be reserved for face to face meetings, socialising with colleagues and deep collaborative work