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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To not want my 3 year old to come out of nursery telling me that Jesus died on the cross but came alive later?

215 replies

ptangyangkipperbang · 07/03/2008 10:58

DS3 is 3 and goes to a nursery affiliated to the local church school. However, it is a nursery for all local schools, not just the church one. Even if he was going to the church school I would still think 3 is a bit young for this, but he is going to a different school. Do I just bite my tongue when he announces with absolute certainty what the Easter story is?

OP posts:
thegreenfairy · 07/03/2008 17:20

Fennel - just wanted to day I PMSL at your DD's 'easter bonnets'!

harpsichordcarrier · 07/03/2008 17:22

absolutely right Fennel, in many places (esp rural villages) there is really very little "choice" about where to send your child.
and of course there are many many reasons for choosing a school, not just the religious content of the teaching.

pointydog · 07/03/2008 17:23

It's only the gruesomeness of it I objected to.

harpsichordcarrier · 07/03/2008 17:26

I actually think the Noah's Ark story is worse, because it is all jollied up and in primary colours.

pointydog · 07/03/2008 17:29

but teh dds have never been told the noah's ark story from the point of view of all the other people who drowned. Noah and family are the only humans mentioned really. It's about survival more than death.

uptomyeyes · 07/03/2008 17:29

I like DS2's version of the Easter story whereby Jesus dies on a hot cross bun.

pointydog · 07/03/2008 17:31

lol eyes

Greyriverside · 07/03/2008 17:39

VictorianSqualor, I take your point there. However for me that would be like saying "I don't know if the easter bunny exists or not" and anyway my intent would to defuse any worries a child have from stories like that.

I used to make up bedtime stories as I went along because I found that more fun than reading from a book. But I always said they were just stories "but fun anyway, yes?" and that worked out just fine.

Squiffy · 07/03/2008 17:48

ROFL, uptomyeyes

VictorianSqualor · 07/03/2008 17:50

I suppose in a way it would be similar to the Easter Bunny type thing, but I always say to my DC's as much information as I have, I have the info on the Easter Bunny and where it originates from, so I have told them that.

If they ask me about fairies or dragons for example, I tell them that though I've never seen one, nor do I know anyone who has they were a huge part of mythical folklore.

The BIBLE however, is a great deal harder to decide upon whether it is fact or fiction, at the moment Dd beleives in God so I just tell her the book was written by man, and is man's interpretation of what they supposedly saw/experienced all those years ago, but just like Easops fables, the stories have good messages behind them.

pruners · 07/03/2008 17:51

Message withdrawn

pointydog · 07/03/2008 17:51

I agree with pruners

Unfitmother · 07/03/2008 17:55

IMo YABU

It's affiliated to a church? - of course they are going to teach the most fundamental part of their faith!

contentiouscat · 07/03/2008 17:56

OH BLU "They should have put a nail through his head, then it wouldn't have taken a long time" PMSL - dont you just love they way they look at things.

I went to a strict religious school - Indoctrination is totally the right term for the way the bible was taught to us but it really has not done me any long term damage . As a adult aetheist I can say hand on heart it really doesnt bother me my children hearing this even though I personally think its all bunkum.

One of the best schools I could have chosen in my area was a CofE school but I didnt chose it because the vicar is a boorish snob and I felt I would be a hypocrite if I sent my children there. I DO think type though when I keep reading people who have CHOSEN to send their children to religious schools getting upset when their children are being taught about the religion (be it COE, Catholic - whatever) Another thread where a child at a catholic school was taught contraception was a sin springs to mind - fgs what would you expect at a catholic school!!

The only way to stop this happening would be to ban schools from teaching ANY religion and whilst I would have NO problem with that I dont think the Muslim or Catholic communities in particular would accept that. If schools have to teach about other religions then it is TOTALLY right they also teach about CHRISTIANITY!

Katgirl · 07/03/2008 18:00

I was taught different religions/beliefs at school and it's not brain washed me.

My son keeps going on about Jesus stories at the moment and he keep asking me to confirm if they are true. My standard answer is 'that's what some people believe.'

I just figure whilst they are young they are just stories. I mean, I know there was no fairy godmother who changed a pumpkin into a carriage but I'm sure I once believed it true.

pointydog · 07/03/2008 18:02

I have no problem with the te\ching of religion.

I have a slight problem with tales of extreme brutality being told to a young child.

cat64 · 07/03/2008 18:10

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

Katgirl · 07/03/2008 18:17

I still believe the three little pigs is a true story

I'd forgotten about red riding hood, What a scarey story - a wolf eats a grandma and then dresses up in her clothes and tries to eat the little girl

I'm not going to sleep tonight - thanks cat x

MegBusset · 07/03/2008 18:21

YANBU, this kind of thing is a personal bugbear of mine. However, all you can do is give a balancing viewpoint and trust that as he gets older he will be able to better understand the difference between myths/beliefs and fact.

Oh, and you could always join the Campaign for Secular Education

contentiouscat · 07/03/2008 18:22

My gran would only EVER tell us Brother Grimms fairy tales...all of which if you think about them are scarey...but honestly I dont think the majority of children are bothered we certainly werent.

Blu · 07/03/2008 19:33

I am all in favour of DS hearing about all the religious beliefs and stories, - but it did make me laugh that at the same time I had surpressed the Alan Ahalberg book 'Copos and Robbers' for excessive and brutal violence, DS was musing over effective torture and assination techniques based on the easter story told to him at nursery.

Blu · 07/03/2008 19:40

And last year, when he was 5, DS's proposed design for his school 'Spring bonnet' included several rabbits ('because easter isn't just about chocolate, you know, Mummy') sitting round Jesus on the cross, who would be 'not dead, but nearly dead, and going aaarrrgggghhh, aaaarrrgghhh''.

It's are tricky business.

ChasingSquirrels · 07/03/2008 19:45

haven't read the thread, I could have posted this OP 2 years ago, and it wasn't the religion aspect of it that I was annoyed about - it was the graphic description that my 3yo gave a Jesus being nailed to and dying on the cross.
I don't think YABU.

pointydog · 07/03/2008 20:02

Yeah, I know fairy tales are grim and I'm all for that. A serious story of a man being nailed to a cross by other adults and being left to die is different, I think. But I take your point and perhaps children don't see it as any different to a fairy tale.

SueBaroo · 07/03/2008 21:12

Oh, I miss all the fun when the computer goes on the blink [grump]

I think yabu, particularly about the church-affliated nursery, and partly about the age thing, but then my children have known that Jesus 'died on the cross and came alive again' (love that 'came alive again' bit, actually) since they were very little, but then it is the central plank of our faith.