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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To as you to teach your child how to act around dogs?

418 replies

ToBeOrNotToBee · 07/10/2023 19:58

I'm gobsmacked, truly, still around an hour or so after this event.
Dog and I have had a busy day travelling and exploring the countryside.
On our way home, coming off train 3 of 3 on the return leg, having been out for 12 hours, I walk to the lift (which is around a corner and obscured by a stairwell) at the end of the platform with dog to heel besides me.
We're waiting with a few others when this 5-6 year old child appears around the corner, running towards us, hands outstretched, literally beelining for the dog. I see what's about to happen and immediately put the dog behind my legs and put my hand out telling the child a stern 'No'.
The child then tries to go behind to reach my dog, who is cowering between my legs. I have no choice but to grab hold of the child's coat and physically stop them, letting go when the child stops trying to reach my dog.
After a moment or two, the Dad appears and then screams at me for touching his child. As he's midscream, the lift appears and I go into it with a few others and doors close as everyone else looks awkwardly at their feet.
The doors close, we go on our merry wall.
But I couldn't stop this feeling that the child will one day do that to the wrong dog and end up a dog bite statistic.
Say for example, I wasn't as switched on, and my dog as placid as he is, or in pain that day, and the child did poke him painfully causing him to snap and bite. Child would have been hurt, my dog potentially put down, and I get a conviction for having a Dangerous Dog Out of Control.
It's something I've noticed over recent years, people treating strange dogs as public property and not animals with sharp teeth and their own minds.
So please, teach your children not to run whilst on busy train platforms (or any train platform), to not approach unknown dogs, and if someone says no, to respect it.

Is that too much to ask???

OP posts:
RaeHitsEbSire · 08/10/2023 18:50

WhileMyDishwasherGentlyWeeps · 08/10/2023 18:45

That doesn’t make a lot of sense.

The real world has rules. I’d like another one, and a simple one: you should have to muzzle your dog.

Well, it doesn't have that rule, however much you might want it, so you need to educate your children on the basis that we do not have that rule.

WhileMyDishwasherGentlyWeeps · 08/10/2023 18:52

HappiestSleeping · 08/10/2023 18:48

How would it be simple to enforce? How many police do you think there are? They can't cope with major crime, how quick do you think they'll be round when you call to say "I saw a dog in the park without a muzzle today"?

In principle it is simple to implement, however I suspect the list of things that are higher priority is long enough to mean it wont be discussed in the commons any time soon.

Of course, if you feel that strongly, you could start the Muzzle All Dogs party (MAD), and see if you could get elected. I'd be first in the queue to admit I underestimated public feeling and would buy you a beer.

Any report, with a photo of dog and owner probably, to the police or council would do.

Why do dog owners always say that any restriction on them is unworkable? What are you scared of? Responsibility?

Gwenhwyfar · 08/10/2023 18:55

"That's not strictly true. What it is saying is "I'm unhappy with the situation and would like it to stop, either by you moving away, or by me being allowed to move away". So it's a defensive thing more often than aggression."

Maybe, but as you say, laundrettes are for humans more than they are for dogs so there is no reason why I should move away and the dog owner shouldn't have such a dog at the laundrette. I'm not in the UK and where I live dogs are allowed in more places. I have no problem with that if they behave.
I argued with the dog owner, but she said it was Ok because the dog is small and the other customer in the laundrette took her side so I was left on my own with this issue really.

MissBattleaxe · 08/10/2023 18:57

OP when you say your dog was at heel was it on a lead? Sorry if I've missed that it was.

RaeHitsEbSire · 08/10/2023 18:58

WhileMyDishwasherGentlyWeeps · 08/10/2023 18:52

Any report, with a photo of dog and owner probably, to the police or council would do.

Why do dog owners always say that any restriction on them is unworkable? What are you scared of? Responsibility?

Unless the owner had their address tattooed on their forehead, they're not going to be traceable from a photo.

Riverlee · 08/10/2023 19:07

My dog isn’t public property. I brought him for my pleasure, not anyone else. I do not expect children (or adults) to stroke him without permission. Parents are responsible for their children. Thus obviously doesn’t absolve dog owners of their responsibility, but both parties are responsible for their charges.

For the record, I always make him sit near children, or walk away from them.

OrigamiOwl · 08/10/2023 19:11

Children shouldn't be just approaching dogs, as if anything happens it will always be the dog that gets the blame.
I took my large breed dog to the vets the other day. He was on a lead, sitting next to me, literally an inch from my foot minding his own business when a child ran up to him, grabbed him around the neck and have him a hug. Fortunately he wasn't bothered, but many other dogs (understandably) would have been unhappy with this forced interaction. And it would have been me who got in trouble if something had happened.

WhileMyDishwasherGentlyWeeps · 08/10/2023 19:16

RaeHitsEbSire · 08/10/2023 18:58

Unless the owner had their address tattooed on their forehead, they're not going to be traceable from a photo.

Yes they would. Just like photos of housebreakers, muggers and car thieves.

WhileMyDishwasherGentlyWeeps · 08/10/2023 19:17

OrigamiOwl · 08/10/2023 19:11

Children shouldn't be just approaching dogs, as if anything happens it will always be the dog that gets the blame.
I took my large breed dog to the vets the other day. He was on a lead, sitting next to me, literally an inch from my foot minding his own business when a child ran up to him, grabbed him around the neck and have him a hug. Fortunately he wasn't bothered, but many other dogs (understandably) would have been unhappy with this forced interaction. And it would have been me who got in trouble if something had happened.

So muzzle your dog. Simple really.

OrigamiOwl · 08/10/2023 19:19

Duplicate.

OrigamiOwl · 08/10/2023 19:20

WhileMyDishwasherGentlyWeeps · 08/10/2023 19:17

So muzzle your dog. Simple really.

My dog has never snapped at anyone, never shown any aggression. I'm not going to muzzle him because you can't control your kid in public.
I think we'll just have to agree to disagree about that one.

RaeHitsEbSire · 08/10/2023 19:21

WhileMyDishwasherGentlyWeeps · 08/10/2023 19:16

Yes they would. Just like photos of housebreakers, muggers and car thieves.

Huh - not in my experience. You must have been exceptionally fortunate.

WhileMyDishwasherGentlyWeeps · 08/10/2023 19:22

OrigamiOwl · 08/10/2023 19:19

Duplicate.

Edited

I understand that you disagree. I just want to know what the problem with muzzling is.

I imagine that you simply want your dog to be as free as possible, sod everyone else. Is that right?

HappiestSleeping · 08/10/2023 19:23

WhileMyDishwasherGentlyWeeps · 08/10/2023 18:52

Any report, with a photo of dog and owner probably, to the police or council would do.

Why do dog owners always say that any restriction on them is unworkable? What are you scared of? Responsibility?

I'm not scared of anything. I'm perfectly happy to be responsible should my dog bite anyone, although I presume you mean that I should be held accountable? I'm perfectly happy for that too.

Also, I didn't say it was unworkable, just that there are much higher priority items to worry about, so would be difficult to work. Let's take your scenario. How many departments would need to be set up to wade through photographs to identify the perpetrators, locate them, issue a penalty etc etc? Theoretically, of course it is possible, but is it really the most sensible thing to be spending public money on when knife crime and other violent crime is increasing?

Answer me honestly, would you rather see more police on the street, or a department set up to deal with photos of dogs without muzzles?

WhileMyDishwasherGentlyWeeps · 08/10/2023 19:23

RaeHitsEbSire · 08/10/2023 19:21

Huh - not in my experience. You must have been exceptionally fortunate.

Why do people take pictures of crims then? Or have photo ring doorbells?

OrigamiOwl · 08/10/2023 19:25

WhileMyDishwasherGentlyWeeps · 08/10/2023 19:22

I understand that you disagree. I just want to know what the problem with muzzling is.

I imagine that you simply want your dog to be as free as possible, sod everyone else. Is that right?

No, clearly my dog isn't free - he's controlled, on a lead, an inch from me, he's not running loose in the waiting room.

But clearly you believe all dogs should be muzzled, no matter the circs, which I disagree with.

WhileMyDishwasherGentlyWeeps · 08/10/2023 19:29

HappiestSleeping · 08/10/2023 19:23

I'm not scared of anything. I'm perfectly happy to be responsible should my dog bite anyone, although I presume you mean that I should be held accountable? I'm perfectly happy for that too.

Also, I didn't say it was unworkable, just that there are much higher priority items to worry about, so would be difficult to work. Let's take your scenario. How many departments would need to be set up to wade through photographs to identify the perpetrators, locate them, issue a penalty etc etc? Theoretically, of course it is possible, but is it really the most sensible thing to be spending public money on when knife crime and other violent crime is increasing?

Answer me honestly, would you rather see more police on the street, or a department set up to deal with photos of dogs without muzzles?

I think dog bites and attacks are a massive issue. The news seems to back me up.

We don’t need lots more police. Just a new and simple law and some enforcement. New laws are enacted every day. A requirement to muzzle all dogs, with a penalty for the owner and confiscation of the dog would be one of the most straightforward, easiest and cheapest to enforce.

RaeHitsEbSire · 08/10/2023 19:30

WhileMyDishwasherGentlyWeeps · 08/10/2023 19:23

Why do people take pictures of crims then? Or have photo ring doorbells?

Well, it's worth a try, but unlikely to go anywhere.

If a muzzling law was brought in, an unmuzzled dog that hadn't harmed anyone would be right at the bottom of the priority list. If there happened to be a nearby officer they'd doubtless do something (probably just a warning while the owner made some excuse about how the muzzle fell off or broke), but otherwise, the police wouldn't be trawling through photographs to identify the owner.

If the dog bit someone it might be different, but then so would it if a dog bit someone with no muzzling law in place.

WhileMyDishwasherGentlyWeeps · 08/10/2023 19:34

RaeHitsEbSire · 08/10/2023 19:30

Well, it's worth a try, but unlikely to go anywhere.

If a muzzling law was brought in, an unmuzzled dog that hadn't harmed anyone would be right at the bottom of the priority list. If there happened to be a nearby officer they'd doubtless do something (probably just a warning while the owner made some excuse about how the muzzle fell off or broke), but otherwise, the police wouldn't be trawling through photographs to identify the owner.

If the dog bit someone it might be different, but then so would it if a dog bit someone with no muzzling law in place.

Why would a copper or dog warden have to be nearby? If they could identify you - which wouldn’t be very difficult, especially if the photos were publicised, like with other criminals - they’d just come to your house, arrest you and take your dog away.

RaeHitsEbSire · 08/10/2023 19:36

WhileMyDishwasherGentlyWeeps · 08/10/2023 19:34

Why would a copper or dog warden have to be nearby? If they could identify you - which wouldn’t be very difficult, especially if the photos were publicised, like with other criminals - they’d just come to your house, arrest you and take your dog away.

Would they bollocks be arsed to do that! Half the time, they even won't come out for crimes where people have been harmed.

Riverlee · 08/10/2023 19:36

Yes, let’s muzzle the kids, or have them on reins so they can’t get to the dog. That should solve the problem! (Light-hearted).

HappiestSleeping · 08/10/2023 19:40

WhileMyDishwasherGentlyWeeps · 08/10/2023 19:29

I think dog bites and attacks are a massive issue. The news seems to back me up.

We don’t need lots more police. Just a new and simple law and some enforcement. New laws are enacted every day. A requirement to muzzle all dogs, with a penalty for the owner and confiscation of the dog would be one of the most straightforward, easiest and cheapest to enforce.

Unfortunately the statistics do not agree with you. Dog bites and attacks are not a massive issue. They are an issue that get massive publicity. Pre 2022, the average was 3 fatalities per year. Compare that to over 70,000 reported cases of rape. Or 46,000 reported cases of knife crime, etc etc etc. Of course there are other dog related incidents that don't end in fatality, but it is infinitesimal in comparison. I would much rather see those dealt with.

And yes, the statistics are skewed by an increase in the last year. This is already linked to covid, and the increase in dog ownership by stupid people who didn't know what they were doing as can be evidenced by them turfing their dogs back to kennels as they didn't know how to look after them.

WhileMyDishwasherGentlyWeeps · 08/10/2023 19:42

Riverlee · 08/10/2023 19:36

Yes, let’s muzzle the kids, or have them on reins so they can’t get to the dog. That should solve the problem! (Light-hearted).

Sure. Everyone should restrict their own and their kids’ behaviour for your dog’s peace of mind. (Light hearted)

WhileMyDishwasherGentlyWeeps · 08/10/2023 19:45

HappiestSleeping · 08/10/2023 19:40

Unfortunately the statistics do not agree with you. Dog bites and attacks are not a massive issue. They are an issue that get massive publicity. Pre 2022, the average was 3 fatalities per year. Compare that to over 70,000 reported cases of rape. Or 46,000 reported cases of knife crime, etc etc etc. Of course there are other dog related incidents that don't end in fatality, but it is infinitesimal in comparison. I would much rather see those dealt with.

And yes, the statistics are skewed by an increase in the last year. This is already linked to covid, and the increase in dog ownership by stupid people who didn't know what they were doing as can be evidenced by them turfing their dogs back to kennels as they didn't know how to look after them.

What are the dog bite numbers? Hospitalisations because of dogs? Numbers of reports of out of control dogs?

HappiestSleeping · 08/10/2023 19:50

7987 hospital admissions, children making up about 20% of that. Not insignificant, however a good many of them will be the owner of the dog concerned.

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