To get a new identity and face and move to a new country?

[SurpriseItsMeHorseyNeighNeigh]

Just that, really.

I went for a brunch with some Mums from my oldest's new class. I chose pancakes, a safe choice. Or so I thought.

They came with a cute little meringuy decoration on top. I started with that. I cut it in 2, put it my mouth and realised that it was butter. I looked up and made eye contact with one of the Mums. She looked slightly horrified. I had no choice but swallow.

I hesitated between eating the other half like a boss while maintaining eye contact and praying that things don't start to slide down or up before the end of th e brunch or using the butter as mother nature had intended. I chose the latter (and still prayed)

The Mums are nice enough but they don't look like they would mix butter with meringue. I don't get out often.

I have no choice do I? We need to pack up and start a new life elsewhere?

Hahaha this is something I would do.

I think the absolute power move of continued eye contact means you're now top dog and the others know not to mess with you. You can safely stay in the country and be know as butter big bollocks forevermore.

Hahaha, this is awesome!
well, you already established your place as the top mum by your power move - you now need to pretend to be mortified if any of them uses butter the “normal” way

I love this

About 10 years ago I was hanging out with some new colleagues at one of their flats. We ordered a huge Chinese from a fancy place, and I'd never heard of most of the dishes.

When it arrived, it was kind of pass different things round and add a bit to your plate. We had already drunk a LOT of wine by this point. The containers had like little compartments with different things in, rather than one dish in each one.

I was passed another container, and it had this white, rectangular thing on it. The wine suddenly hit me and I picked it up, confused. How was I supposed to take a spoonful or two like I had with everything else?

So I shrugged and took a huge bite out of it instead.

The person next to me gave me a face... and unwrapped the white paper. To this day I have no idea what was inside. Understandably it went in the bin after I'd bitten a chunk out of it.

If the person who gave me a red cocktail onion when I was whining for a maraschino cherry is still alive, it was 60 years but I have never forgiven you for laughing at my face.

I would of done that! 🤣🤣

Thanks for pointing out what a failure I am. No, I don't get out often. I am not good a socialising and don't quite have the means to eat out often.

Congrats on being better than me, I guess?

Is there a need to both write your username in the body of the post and then sign it like a letter, though?

If you thought it looked like meringue,was it whipped butter?

If so, it is an American abomination thing I had not heard of until today when I guessed and looked it up.

I mean WTF?! What happened to sugar and lemon or jam or Nutella?

When I was 14 or so at a quite posh buffet with my dad (Sir Robin Day and other TV luminaries were there), I took a huge dollop of whipped cream and plopped it on my apple pie. It was salad cream.

I think that this was uncalled for.
Maybe take a moment reflecting on how you could be a nicer person.

Yes. It was whipped butter by the sounds of it. Looks like pale cream meringue if piped (and the packages served cool), am I right? Anyway...I bet it tasted good 😀

@Chersfrozenface it looked something like the top of that. Honest mistake really.

@Chersfrozenface - is it possible the pancakes were griddle cake (aka American style breakfast pancakes) and not crepes?

I was eating a ploughman's with someone once and they ate the pat of butter as though it was a piece of cheese. They styled it out and i didn't say a thing.

I am 100% certain that you have a better social life than TheBluntTruth given the effort they’re putting in to becoming a “personality” on mumsnet but just coming across as a twat.

I once got a lift from a colleague. On autopilot I gave him a kiss on the cheek when I got out of the car. I have never wanted so desperately for the ground to swallow me up!

There should really be a government assistance programme for situations like the OPs.

The fact that I was anticipating a delicious meringue and brutally realised it was butter added insult to injury.

Definitely pancakes, not crepe (and definitely butter too, I learn the hard way 😣)

Tryagain That is hilarious 🤣

That is very fancy.

I must need to get out more too because any butter I've had on pancakes has never looked that good.

I had no choice but swallow.

No napkin or serviette to discretely spit it into?

@TheBluntTruth

The OP is demonstrating self depreciating humour. This is quite British. You might try it.

Also, in many (most?) parts of the UK pancakes are crepes and not traditionally served with butter. Chances are the OP is talking about a stack of spongy American style pancakes. And I have definitely seen them served with chocolate chips and all kinds of shit.

Here's an idea, how about you work on your social skills instead of being sanctimonious? <yawn>