To take my 3.5 year old travelling for 2 months?

[travellingwithatoddler]

Me and my partner are taking our 3.5 year old travelling around Asia for 2 months split into two trips - one month in January, one month in June)

We’re going to India, Thailand, Malaysia, Singapore, Indonesia and Japan for a total of 9 weeks.

From every angle I have people telling me that I am selfish, I’m only doing this for myself, he won’t remember it blah blah.

Just because he won’t remember it, doesn’t mean he won’t enjoy it at the time! He is a fab little traveller and absolutely thrives on being outdoors exploring new places. I know my child better than anyone and wouldn’t put myself through the stress if I thought he’d hate it! I have also travelled extensively so I'm not naive to this.

My family have actually said that I am a terrible mother for taking him ‘somewhere so dangerous like India’ - we’re only doing the Golden triangle fgs! And we have a private driver taking us from A to B.

Thoughts? It’s actually starting to get me a little bit down, I just want to look forward to it!

It’s fine. It’s split in half also.
The only thing I would say is my 3 year old gets a little homesick after 2 ish weeks. So take favourite items and let him watch familar shows during downtime

My child has memories from being 3yo! We lived abroad for a couple of years and she can describe parts of it well.

Going before they start school when you ate restricted by term times is a good idea. You may have to pay to keep their nursery spot open during the January trip if you need childcare between the two trips, but that might not be a limiting factor for you.

Do it now whilst you can x before school I wish I had. My sister took a sabbatical and took their 4 year olds to South America before they started school.

Not the same but I took my kids 9 and 11 to Mexico City on my own which is sometimes considered a dangerous

Life is for living and it's harder and more expensive for holidays in term times atleast you can do some proper travelling now. Ignore the comments and do it anyway, it's your life and decisions. Maybe they aren't adventurous. Btw I've been to the golden triangle and I didn't consider it dangerous. Just hardcore travelling and unfortunately there is a lot of poverty but not dangerous. Just keep your wits about you

The longest we've been away is 3.5 weeks and he cried when we had to come home yes we always take an extra cabin luggage with a backpack full of his toys! So that keeps him happy having his favourite things

Sounds brilliant; not selfish at all.

It’s a wonderful experience. You know a lot of small minded, opinionated and bizarre people.

Oh just reread yes been to all those countries and I'd say they weren't overly dangerous destinations. Just do it!

Sounds fantastic. Enjoy!

Eh? I have absolutely no idea why this would be selfish. It sounds lovely.

If we went by the 'they won't remember it' mantra, should we just sit inside with dc till they're 10 on the basis that they don't remember it anyway?!? How strange.

And it isn't really 2 months. Its2 x 1 month, which is not that much different to two holidays abroad just for slightly longer times than the norm.

What an amazing opportunity for all of you.
I can’t understand why you wouldn’t do it.

Start to get excited 😊

Haven’t you got anyone saying ‘oh wow that’s cool ‘?
Its unbelievable no one has said anything positive! Don’t discuss it with your friends and family anymore. Have fun

Also, they may or may not remember it but surely experiences shape you, so it will have an impact somewhere in their subconscious even if they don't directly remember it ?

Lucky child!

To be honest we've only just finalised all of the details and flights etc so I haven't mentioned it to that many people, mainly just family! But to be honest they're not the nicest either way but that's a rant for another time!

Thanks everyone for making me feel better! We went through a very traumatic medical experience with my little boy back in 2022 (he's absolutely fine now) and it really has taught us to make the most of these times.

Any advice is welcome too if anyones been to that part of the world with kids!

Why selfish? It sounds great! We're doing similar with our 4 and 2 year old next year. At the very least, they'll get to spend every day with us for 10 weeks which they love.

Sounds brilliant - your child will get so much out of it and most of all they will be with you. Ignore the narrow minded. You'll never again have that freedom to go away with them for such a long time.

Sounds great, what an opportunity for you all!

Only 'problem' I could see if that you'll give your child a passion for travelling, so they will want to spend a lot of time travelling and on holidays as they get older - they will need to make sure they get a good education to afford the money to continue as they get older :)

Not selfish at all.

I admire your adventurous spirit with a child a tow. We love to travel but as soon as our child came along we didnt have the energy or confidence to travel with them and didnt go anywhere for the first 2 years.

Even if your child wont 'remember' it, the enrichment and experience will have an imprint on their character development.

They'll be starting school soon. It's now or never so go for it!

Have a great time.

Sounds amazing op.

Ignore people who say he won't remember it so why bother. Ridiculous. If early experiences didn't matter because they're not remembered then we could surely lock all our children in a box until they're 2 right? I mean they won't remember it so...

A wide range of experiences at this age helps set them up for life, remembered or not 😊

I never get "they won't remember it". If you lived by that you'd never do anything with them.

Go and enjoy yourselves.

It doesn't matter if he remembers it really. Experiences at that age are still important. That's why, adverseley, trauma at that age also affects us so deeply. Experiences shape us even if we do not remember. He will learn loads and will have a great time.

Take loads of photos and make up some proper albums when you get back. They will absolutely love looking at these as they get older. And it will do doubt encourage them to do exciting things as they grow up.

We’re about to take our 3.5 year old to Costa Rica for a month of backpacking! If you love to travel then why not take your kid along too, we travel a lot and have had a great time taking out little one with us.

We obviously adjust the schedule, activities and accommodation so it’s kid friendly.

Enjoy!! And don’t listen to the negativity!

Mine would absolutely love this. He loves being out doing stuff and seeing places why do I keep wasting money on toys. Good on you OP. Just keep your expectations in check and enjoy it!

Of course you should do it! He's nearly old enough for school so you'll struggle to ever do anything like this again other than in the school holidays, it's the perfect age! By your son's age I had already lived in multiple countries (mostly Europe) and had my 4th birthday in Morocco (we were there for about six months). I definitely have memories of it and once I was a bit older I loved having the photos to look back on as well. Your son will have a whale of a time (and so will you!)