Is this neglect?

[Thanksforreading]

So DD has been attending this nursery for well over a year and we have never had a problem till last night. She is 2 years old.

I picked her up from nursery as usual (Thursday 5.45pm), and run her bath, take off her clothes and get her to sit on her potty. Before she sits on her potty she touches her thigh and says “ouchie” and “help me” so I have a look and I notice a red mark on her inner thigh! (Photo one) I was a bit shocked, but told her it was okay, and decided not to give her a bath but just a quick shower down instead. She then tells me “itchy” she’s got very limited words, so when she tells me itchy I was a bit confused as well, still not too sure what to make of it but I dress her and email nursery about my concerns. (6.30pm)
Husband gets back, and he looks, sends over a very strong email to nursery. By 7.30pm her mark is looking 100% like a burn mark from friction and it’s weeping hard, we just clean it a bit and pop aloe Vera on it, DD is super upset with lots tears and telling us “pain”
We have woken up to (photo 2) this morning to darken area of the weeping area. Nursery has replied this morning with an email saying they will investigate and give them day to get back to us.
No courtesy call nothing not even an apology or sorry to hear that this has happened, just they will investigate. Nursery closes at 6 pm.
I’ve managed to book our DD in with the doctors and they have confirmed with a written document, confirming it is a friction burn. I’ve given them till 530Pm and have tried calling them three times and no one has picked up and the voice message box is also full. I feel like my daughter has been at the hands of neglect now, and it is now a Friday evening, so this will be left till Monday morning at least. Am I being unreasonable or am I just asking for too much? This is a private nursery and we pay £94 a day for childcare.

We have a bad reaction to aloe Vera. Never again!

Could it be chemical burn from the nappy? Seems far fetched because pampers have to be mega mega full before they split (long story, one of ours ended up in the paddling pool. They literally swell up like pillows.

Oh she didn’t even make it onto the potty, I asked and she already was telling me she had pain.

Bore off. Presumably the OP has a job like 99% of mothers of 2 year olds do.

@Boo1321 because mum works? Because mum doesn’t but needs a break? Because social spaces are one of the single best variables in speech development in under 4’s? Because peer interaction is good for her? Because her parents needs or want her to???

OP have you ever used aloe Vera on her before?

Actually @RandomButtons said it better 👏👏👏

That looks like a chemical burn to me.

Do they log what time they last changed the nappy? Because they surely would have seen it the last time they changed her nappy, that will narrow down the timescale that it happened in. I would not be happy, that looks awful and their communication isn't very good at all. You've made a complaint so that should be followed up properly. How is it looking this evening?

Sometimes things happen. And people don't see them happen or don't realise they're as bad as they are. So I wouldn't be complaining to nursery about what happened until you have found out what happened. I would have expected the manager or key worker to ring you to speak to you about it though after your email, that is poor form, but then if you sent a furious email they might have decided it's best to keep everything in writing.

@BandicootCrash Burns get worse over time. My daughter had a bad burn, first day it just look like skin had been grazed. 3rd day was angry, red, blistered

I have no idea what a yoyo pram is or why the straps are any different to a normal pram? I googled, it just looked like any pram with a crotch strap?

I was commenting that you said it looked like photo 1 when you initially saw it, and then you said that about an hour later at 7.30 it looked 100% like a burn - I was pointing out that friction burns reach the 'definitely looks like a burn' stage really quickly. So must have happened shortly before you saw it initially. I'm not saying it wasn't nursery, I just woukd be very very sure before accusing them because it looks to have happened in the cross over between her being at nursery and being at home.

My son once rubbed his forehead on the carpet in his reception class (unsure why- odd child). It was a red mark when I picked him up. In the morning it had broken like in your photos OP.

This is what I’m super confused about because it is inner left thigh… like you says knees is so common I wouldn’t even consider it as neglect because it’s a normal area! Like a bruise on arm or shin area is super normal.

Hope you’re ok OP. I would hit the roof and rightly so!

Could it be this ?
I have seen it and it really does look like a burn.
https://patient.info/doctor/staphylococcal-scalded-skin-syndrome

That’s what I’m wondering happened.

So it would have been barely visible to the nursery staff and then it’s gotten worse over time.

Also not sure about your nursery but the one I use has cctv so the time I’ve had an issue the manager fully retraced there steps. Hoping yours has too as I’m not aware of many that don’t nowadays

Oh bless him! I think most children do things us adults would never understand, but you must of been told that he was rubbing his forehead on the carpet for you to know. I am more upset with no one telling us what has happened and at pick up they said she was very happy. It was a great day and we live only four minutes away from nursery and she travels in a yo-yo pram which is very padded and loose strapping around the area. I mean even if nursery said she climbed and had an accident, I would of been sure yes fine, it’s the lack to knowledge

There are probably quite a few ways it could have happened, she could have slipped on something and some material or a strap or basically anything could have caught her there. If she didn't cry at the time or even if she did it may not have been obvious to nursery staff what had happened.

I used to work in the nursery and there was quite a lot of times that parents would ask us about bruises or scrapes and the child had not indicated that they'd hurt themselves so we just didn't know.

Both DD and I get a bad skin reaction to aloe vera which looks like a third degree burn. Perhaps that has aggravated it overnight.

@Thanksforreading this EXACT thing happened to me, I actually posted on here last month. Basically they left her in a soiled nappy for hours.

She needed antibiotics in the end. Nursery were awful about it. Long story short, pulled her out of nursery with no notice, my solicitor has contacted their insurance company to start proceedings (not being grabby before anyone jumps on me, it's money held for my daughter by the court until she's 18) police informed (as social services themselves told me to, it's neglect and an abusive act. Social services have also investigated and inspected the nursery.

I know this sounds a bit OTT, but it was totally avoidable and they needed to be taught a lesson. I'd not have been as wildly angry had they not played the whole thing down and denied everything until I was able to prove it all. Make sure you go to the doctors and call social services, keep records of everything

I have a mark like this on my hand at the moment - I got it from trapping my hand between a door and a metal cage I was using at work. When I first did it it was just a bit red, though it was quite tender, then later on the skin broke like in your picture. Hope it's better soon and you find out what happened.

Also, I just want to add that it was a split second thing that I don't think could have been prevented (apart from by me being more careful!).

The getting worse overnight is easily explained if it's a burn and has popped overnight. Goes from a red mark to an open wound.

For context this is what happened to my daughter and was the result of being left in a soiled nappy for hours and made to walk in it, it looks very similar to your little one and please don't be talked into thinking it's "not that bad" I had the opinion of two doctors, a solicitor, social services and two police officers, so I can safely say you have every right to pursue this as you see fit.