Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Hate when people have negative opinions on your baby names

126 replies

Lauryn95 · 15/09/2023 16:37

Does anyone else just think people are so entitled and rude when they tell you they dislike your chosen baby name ? It really annoys me and I feel there's no need. I feel like that's an opinion you keep to yourself unless obviously say the names something like chlamydia. We've struggled to choose a name for our daughter so badly and then finally we found one we adore and everyone is just so against it and it's really annoying me ,it's so rude. It happened with my other two aswell ,named my son after my late grandad and SIL straight up said and this is a direct quote "ew I really don't like that " and now this baby people are doing the same saying they hate it and I just feel like you've a right to not like the babies name but that's an opinion you should keep to yourself ,just abit of a rant because I've only told my mum and dh mum and they've both said they hate the name and not even in a nice way ,I just think it's so rude. The name I've picked is Nova and they're both saying that's not a name and I should strongly reconsider My other daughter is called Luna so I fell in love with it (moon and stars) think it's lovely and now I'm so annoyed that they hate it and MIL is actually calling the baby another name hoping I'll change my mind ugh rant over

OP posts:
DWSDB · 15/09/2023 16:38

I agree completely 😂 I’ve only told people my baby name who I know will like it or stfu if they don’t. Sometimes people’s need to voice their opinion overrides the need to make others happy.

DuploTrain · 15/09/2023 16:41

I do agree, people shouldn’t comment.
However I think if you tell people the name before the baby is born then people think it’s up for discussion. After the baby is born it’s final so people are (usually) more polite about it.

I really like Nova but it doesn’t mean stars, it means “new”. It’s used in astronomy to refer to new stars.

Stella means star if that meaning is important to you.

TropicalTrama · 15/09/2023 16:50

If you don’t want opinions then don’t tell people until the baby is here.

Skybluecoat · 15/09/2023 17:11

TropicalTrama · 15/09/2023 16:50

If you don’t want opinions then don’t tell people until the baby is here.

This really.

Nova just makes me think of the really shitty old car, Vauxhall Nova.

JanesBlond · 15/09/2023 17:15

Nova doesn’t mean star. The name you are looking for is Stella.

And I don’t think you know what entitled means.

MaryShelley1818 · 15/09/2023 17:16

Nova is a lovely name, but agree if you'd like moon and stars, Stella and Luna sound even nicer imo.

Mapletreelane · 15/09/2023 17:16

And this is why you shouldn't tell anyone until the baby is born. Simple.

artimesiasfootsteps · 15/09/2023 17:17

Nova is beautiful name, I have a close friend called Nova and she's a clever, capable, talented woman, I think the name adds to her je ne sais quoi. Stella is lovely, as is Cosima.

TheBarbieEffect · 15/09/2023 17:17

If they are saying it to you after baby is born and named, they’re rude and YANBU.

If they are saying it to you before the baby is born then that’s fair game and if you don’t want comments don’t share.

Coralsunset · 15/09/2023 17:18

Nova doesn’t mean stars. As PP said, it’s the name of a rubbish car and means new.

Assuming this baby hasn’t been born yet, you invited comments as soon as you started discussing potential names.

Allthegoodnamesarechosen · 15/09/2023 17:20

I suppose she can always change her name when she gets to forty.

PosyPrettyToes · 15/09/2023 17:21

It doesn't mean star. It means new. Or vauxhall.

Names that do mean star:
Stella
Estelle
Seren
Astra

brownsugarsoymilk · 15/09/2023 17:21

Commenting after a baby is born and named — absolutely wrong
Commenting when you mention the name before a baby is born — ok

For the record, I wish people commented before my parents named me. I was given a terrible, cutesy name, was embarrassed to say it out loud throughout my teen years, and got a deed poll to change it the moment I could.

VyeBrator · 15/09/2023 17:22

I think announcing a name before the baby's born, does kind of invite opinions.

People tend to be fine with opinions if they're positive, but get arsey if they're not.

VyeBrator · 15/09/2023 17:22

And also, you appear to be asking for opinions here too, otherwise you wouldn't have told us the name and your other kid's name.

thoushallleave · 15/09/2023 17:23

My friend told her in laws their chosen baby name and had a horrid comment from her MIL about it, she responded with well I hate the name (insert MIL's name) but I was being polite about it but I can see that you couldn't do the same.

There will always be someone who says they don't like a name. I grew up with a girl called Nova. I really like it. Fuck them and name your child what you want. Your parents had their turn at naming children, you choose what you like. If your MIL tries to call your baby another name shut it down, if it persists, she doesn't get to see the child.

Isittimeformynapyet · 15/09/2023 17:26

You can't just use the word entitled to mean any old negative trait you like, OP. It actually has a specific definition.

Nothing wrong with Nova imo. Bit woo, but there's a lot of that about.

Nanny0gg · 15/09/2023 17:28

Lauryn95 · 15/09/2023 16:37

Does anyone else just think people are so entitled and rude when they tell you they dislike your chosen baby name ? It really annoys me and I feel there's no need. I feel like that's an opinion you keep to yourself unless obviously say the names something like chlamydia. We've struggled to choose a name for our daughter so badly and then finally we found one we adore and everyone is just so against it and it's really annoying me ,it's so rude. It happened with my other two aswell ,named my son after my late grandad and SIL straight up said and this is a direct quote "ew I really don't like that " and now this baby people are doing the same saying they hate it and I just feel like you've a right to not like the babies name but that's an opinion you should keep to yourself ,just abit of a rant because I've only told my mum and dh mum and they've both said they hate the name and not even in a nice way ,I just think it's so rude. The name I've picked is Nova and they're both saying that's not a name and I should strongly reconsider My other daughter is called Luna so I fell in love with it (moon and stars) think it's lovely and now I'm so annoyed that they hate it and MIL is actually calling the baby another name hoping I'll change my mind ugh rant over

You're being unreasonable telling them before the baby's here

People are less likely to be rude when you announce the safe arrival of Ethel Gladys (8 1/2 lbs) than when you discuss all of the ones you've thought about, discarded, brought back and changed your minds about.

Just say you haven't decided yet and if the ARE rude when it's a done deal with the baby here, just tell them it's your choice, your baby and they can mind their own business

SerpentEndBench · 15/09/2023 17:30

Nova means new, not star, as pp have stated.

But new moon (Nova and Luna) works, doesn't it, as a sibset namepair. what a wanky phrase sorry about that

Sceptre86 · 15/09/2023 17:33

I had this when I named my son. My bil said he wasn't keen and I told him he hadn't asked my opinion on his son's name so I really wasn't expecting him to offer it up on mine. That stopped him in his tracks. As I get older I give zero fucks, if people give unsolicited, unwanted advice then they should be prepared for an answer back.

You've got to get better at calling them out and I would say to your mil that you are actually hurt by her behaviour so she needs to stop. As gor your sil you should have used the mumsnet classic, 'did you mean to be so rude?' followed by a firm stare.

ManateeFair · 15/09/2023 17:34

TropicalTrama · 15/09/2023 16:50

If you don’t want opinions then don’t tell people until the baby is here.

I think plenty of people are still rude about baby names even when the name isn't revealed until the baby arrives, to be honest. My cousin had an awful comment from a relative about her baby's name and she didn't share any names until the baby had been born! Some people are just incredibly rude.

If someone says 'Hmmm, what do you think of this name?' then it's OK to say 'Well, I personally wouldn't choose it' but if someone says 'We're going to use this name' then the only polite responses are either 'Oh, that's lovely' or something neutral but interested, like 'Does the name have a special significance to you, or is just a name you really love?'

Fivebeanchilli · 15/09/2023 17:35

I love Luna.
I agree that Nova doesn't mean star but it does sound quite nice with Luna.
Stella would work very well though and give you the meaning you're after.

DustyLee123 · 15/09/2023 17:36

A Nova was a car, so I can see why they might be against it. But this is why you don’t tell anyone the name until it’s born.

birdglasspen · 15/09/2023 17:37
  1. never tell people your baby name ideas before baby arrives.
  2. if you have such awful relatives tell them only when baby is registered with chosen name.
  3. this will stop some comments.
  4. if they still comment after about not liking name just tell them they are extremely rude and it’s none of their business. Then ignore and don’t let it get you down.
Teddleshon · 15/09/2023 17:38

I remember asking my Fil which name out of two he preferred and he replied “neither”. We never asked anyone again and just presented them as a done deal.