Lost my cool with school run mum

[Vanilladanish]

I’m at my absolute wits end. Recently bought a house near the kids primary school and like most primary schools the parking at school run time is a nightmare. There is one mum that constantly parks over my drive blocking me in or out. I work as an on call palliative care nurse and twice now have been late to call outs to provide pain relief and other things to patients at the end of life. I’ve tried to talk to her nicely and she just drives away. A few weeks ago my husband was trying to pull in the drive after work and she was blocking again. There was a queue of traffic behind him and he had to pull over and ask her to move so he could get off the road. She said she would when she was ready. Sometimes she’s there and there are spaces all the way up and down the road but she still blocks my drive.
today she blocked me again - I’ve just finished a night shift and I saw red. I asked her to stop parking and tried to explain I needed to get in and out quickly for work. She just shouted over me so I told her I would slash her tyres next time. I know I was unreasonable to say that and I am really ashamed of myself but I’m absolutely at my wits end. What do I do?!

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@Vanilladanish
Tbh, if she is breaking the law , you should speak with local law enforcement to determine what recourses are available to you. However. I would it frightening to have a discussion with a rational person whose thought processes involves the slashing of tires as a solution to a problem. I don't think that it would ever cross my mind to raise that as a possible solution to any problem.

Realistically, if you live on a direct route to a school, you are probably going to be inconvenienced with the ebb and flow of queue movement in the morning and afternoon. Unfortunately, traffic flow is not a respector of trade or profession.

OMG!!!! I am fuming for you op and also for @Rainbow1901 and all of us who have to deal with such people, whether related to parking or other things.

How can they be so thick?

Thick as pig shit.

They get angry and see themselves a victims yet they violate other people's boundaries. It must be something pathological , surely? It's not normal behaviour.

Similar situation, calling the school will be of little help, speak to neighbours for your street to join a school street scheme so that no one can drive your street except for residents at certain times.

I don't think the parents are thick. I think they are just blinkered and selfish and all that is in their heads is them and their children. Getting as close as they can to school so that their precious darlings don't have to walk the length of themselves. It simply does not occur to them that they are inconveniencing other people.

Even when their selfish behaviour is pointed out, they don't care. Because their convenience is all that ever matters.

I feel your pain because I live right by a school too, so I don't blame you for threatening to slash her tyres! The selfishness and ignorance of some of the car drivers is outrageous!

I confronted one woman and she looked at me and said, 'If you want to act posh then you should live in a posh area'! I politely told her that I have morals and decency and bring my children up to respect other people's property and boundaries, unlike her!

Our school are pretty useless but they occasionally put a line in the newsletter reminding people to respect the neighbours. It doesn't make any difference.

From what I can gather (and I might be wrong), if someone blocks an empty driveway then there's nothing you can do because it's part of the highway but it is wrong to block someone in their driveway because you're blocking their right to the highway. Like I said, I'm not entirely sure on that.

One of my neighbours have recently had a white line painted on the road across their driveway. I don't think it's legally binding or anything but might be worth looking into?

Also, someone mentioned to me once about Operation Crackdown where you can report antisocial parking etc

I would say photo and reg number and complain to the school about her every time she blocks your drive.

It might be worth calling the police non emergency number for advice on what your options are going forward.

She sounds a real piece of work.
Blocking your drive sounds the best way forward, but you shouldn't need to have to do that of course.

To be so blinkered and not understand traffic rules or decent behaviour, to not be able to consider other people's experiences is pretty thick @Stroopwaffels.

I understand the idea behind not blocking access to the highway but blocking egress is OK.

Today though with so many vehicles it's ridiculous to stop someone getting on their drive & therefore taking up even more space on the road.

I also thought that you weren't suppose to block dropped kerbs as they are accessible?

Or is that just ones that council (as opposed to private residents) have put in?

Find out where she lives, and park across her drive.

Oh she’s a special kind of evil blocking you in when you’re palliative care.

I think your response was very restrained. I’d take a photo showing rego and Fb it, call police and the school every single time. I’d also buy some cheap lipstick and write IM A PARKING ASSHOLE / A NURSE WAS LATE TO AN END OF LIFE SCENARIO BECAUSE OF MY PARKING on her windscreen and deny all knowledge, as obviously neighbours all know what you do for work and any stranger walking past can see she’s an asshole.

Can you park where she parks during school pick up?

if someone blocks an empty driveway then there's nothing you can do because it's part of the highway

My Dad's drive was frequently blocked even though there was a garage as "there was no car in the driveway"🙄

Some people just don't give a fuck.

Put a sign and speak with the school and council, take photos. Driveways mustn't be blocked. Traffic police?, I think
She can be heavily fine for doing that. At least in my original country you can call the crane and she would have to pick the car from the council depot.
Not sure if the law is the same here but definitely will be something similar in place.

You take a photo then you call the police, she’s blocking access

Don't think it's illegal to block access, just the other way around. So take photos when she's blocking a car that's on the drive.

Park so you're on the road, blocking your own drive?

Or actually do something to her car! That would be fair enough imo. Not the tyres because then it would be stuck, but maybe a key to the paint?

If there's a time both you and your husband are at home, park somewhere else on the street and when she parks in front of your drive, move your car to right in front of her, and get your husband to park right behind her. Tell her you'll move when you're ready and go and enjoy a nice cup of tea

In experience this is a terrible idea - once you start parking over your drive, people start to think that they can

I would def contact the school as ours are pretty hot on this and often take photos and shame in the school newsletter!

Very sticky 'you park like a cunt' sign on all windows

I would speak to school and make sure they understand the impact on your patients. Our school jumped on this type of thing and spoke directly to parents and named and shamed in newsletters.

Can you park over your drive, so she can't?

Why don't you play her at her own game.

Before the school run starts, get your car out of the drive, once she parks across your drive, park your car right behind her, get a friend or neighbour/ DH if possible to park right in front of her. Block her in for the day.
Don't answer the door when she comes ringing.

Give her a taste of her own medicine! She won't do it again.

I know of someone who was met with the same parked car in front of their driveway one too many times, positioned their wheelie bin in front of the car and put something very sticky on the handle. The driver never parked there again.