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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Hosting loud teenager parties in gardens in residential streets

303 replies

RudsyFarmer · 05/09/2023 17:55

Is this reasonable?

Next door neighbour has given us (and the street) a few days notice of a party that will go on until 12am with loud music and lots of cars arriving /departing. Not enough time to get a room somewhere unfortunately.

I have two primary aged kids and early plans on Sunday morning. Honestly would never be so selfish and would always hire a hall, but I have a feeling I’m in the minority.

AIBU to feel peevish?

OP posts:
Original poster
RudsyFarmer · 05/09/2023 20:06

ThePoshUns · 05/09/2023 20:02

They do but most 18 year olds are in 6th form.
So a lot of their friends are under 18 and therefore may not get into piba or clubs which these days are really strict.
You have all this to look forward to OP when your little angels hit their teens.

Show quote history

Another personal attack but this time on my children! Calling them ‘little angels’ is a dig and a distasteful one.

OP posts:
underneaththeash · 05/09/2023 20:06

I have teens, I have parties. I manage to do social stuff that doesn't disturb the neighbours.

I would be pissed off too.

snowmanshoes · 05/09/2023 20:06

Ok your highness - do calm down ….. you’re hilarious by the way 🙄
teens having a drink and party until midnight - how very dare they 🤭😂🤔

thaegumathteth · 05/09/2023 20:08

OP why are you so uptight and stressed about personal attacks? I mean they're not saying it to your actual children so it doesn't count surely? Much like you're not complaining to your neighbours directly so you can whine all you like. Which of course you can but the only person you're doing a disservice to is yourself so 🤷🏻‍♀️

ThePoshUns · 05/09/2023 20:09

Well OP I'm sure your sense of superiority extends to your children.
You've already said they make no noise.

AllProperTeaIsTheft · 05/09/2023 20:11

That’s how I view this also. You hire a venue and piss off no one.

Except the people who live next door to or on the same road as the venue, presumably. Don't they count?

Original poster
RudsyFarmer · 05/09/2023 20:11

So now I also have a sense of superiority? Wow. It’s like an online psychological profile being built. What else?

OP posts:
Positive41 · 05/09/2023 20:11

BitOutOfPractice · 05/09/2023 18:37

Oh how I’m laughing that @LlynTegid thinks the police will be round, sirens blaring closely followed by the council officials with their clip boards on the strength of some uptight busybody neighbour sending a strongly worded letter 4 days before the party. 😂

Lol!

thaegumathteth · 05/09/2023 20:11

😂

Original poster
RudsyFarmer · 05/09/2023 20:12

AllProperTeaIsTheft · 05/09/2023 20:11

That’s how I view this also. You hire a venue and piss off no one.

Except the people who live next door to or on the same road as the venue, presumably. Don't they count?

If you buy a house next to a social club then I’m guessing that would come up in the searches. A little like buying a house next to a busy road and expecting no traffic. Unrealistic.

OP posts:
foolishone · 05/09/2023 20:14

Maybe buying a house next to other houses with gardens is a bad idea if you can't tolerate people using them too.

thaegumathteth · 05/09/2023 20:14

But when I bought a house where I live I knew other people would live near me and would expect some noise from them sometimes (eg building works, rare parties, kids etc). Unrealistic not to.

Original poster
RudsyFarmer · 05/09/2023 20:14

thaegumathteth · 05/09/2023 20:08

OP why are you so uptight and stressed about personal attacks? I mean they're not saying it to your actual children so it doesn't count surely? Much like you're not complaining to your neighbours directly so you can whine all you like. Which of course you can but the only person you're doing a disservice to is yourself so 🤷🏻‍♀️

Why am I so upset and stressed about personal attacks and yet you are stressed and upset about me having internal thoughts regarding a neighbour holding a party? That’s a little pot calling the kettle black I think.

OP posts:
snowmanshoes · 05/09/2023 20:14

Just calm down. It’s a party. The current teens have had an appalling time of it all - Covid/education/exams - a bit of kindness for an extra hour won’t really do much harm will it? Really?

WimpoleHat · 05/09/2023 20:14

I have two primary aged kids and early plans on Sunday morning

I’d have very early plans on Sunday morning. Loud ones….. Fire with fire and all that.

thaegumathteth · 05/09/2023 20:15

I'm not stressed and uptight OP don't worry I think it's quite funny how much of a tizz you're working yourself up into 🎣

Mrsttcno1 · 05/09/2023 20:15

Oh yes, unrealistic. A bit like buying a house surrounded by other houses inhabited by - shock - other human beings who by nature will of course at some point want to socialise with their friends and family at the home they have spent their money on - and expecting this never to happen, then winging when they pre warn you that they may make noise on a specified date to a specified time once in a blue moon because you have plans the next day.

NotMadeOfStone · 05/09/2023 20:16

LlynTegid · 05/09/2023 17:59

Perhaps send a copy to the local authority or whoever is responsible for noise enforcement in your area, in advance. Also if you think there is anyone likely to drink and drive, or any hint of drug taking, call the police straight away on the evening.

Oh for goodness sake.

Whichwhatnow · 05/09/2023 20:18

I mean... you're a bit unreasonable, especially as they gave warning. But we have a year's warning of the annual carnival that surrounds our flat up until about 4am and it still pisses me off every year (I'm a crap sleeper and it basically messes up the entire next day).

Of course I think people should be allowed their fun but that doesn't make it any less annoying!

Summerbay23 · 05/09/2023 20:19

Austrich · 05/09/2023 17:58

Having a party on a Saturday, setting a noise curfew of midnight, and informing your neighbours in advance is the way reasonable people have parties. They're doing it right.

Presumably this doesn't happen all the time. Your kids will likely sleep through it. What time were you planning on setting off on Sunday?

Agree with this. At some point you’ll have teens wanting to do a similar thing. You can’t always hire a hall for a teenager party due to rules related to time of hire, alcohol, supervision, no under 18s etc. It’s very normal to have the odd house party at that age.

Original poster
RudsyFarmer · 05/09/2023 20:19

Mrsttcno1 · 05/09/2023 20:15

Oh yes, unrealistic. A bit like buying a house surrounded by other houses inhabited by - shock - other human beings who by nature will of course at some point want to socialise with their friends and family at the home they have spent their money on - and expecting this never to happen, then winging when they pre warn you that they may make noise on a specified date to a specified time once in a blue moon because you have plans the next day.

That’s a very hyperbolic post and you know it.

OP posts:
thaegumathteth · 05/09/2023 20:21

It's really, really, not hyperbolic

NotMadeOfStone · 05/09/2023 20:22

Hyperbolic is considering spending £200 on a hotel room to avoid a one-off party you've been told will finish at midnight 🤷🏻‍♀️

snowmanshoes · 05/09/2023 20:22

get off your high horse - you sound so petty and petulant 🤭 ahh bless - yes kick up a fuss - how dare they - stamps feet

OnAMidnightTrainToGeorgia · 05/09/2023 20:22

RudsyFarmer · 05/09/2023 19:53

Their kids also swear loudly and bounce balls regularly but I guess that also makes me intolerant to find that antisocial.

Are your own kids silent?

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