Mrs and Mr Smith

[Oysterbabe]

When I write client letters I always put the woman's name first in the address and write
Dear Mrs & Mr Smith. The letters have to be checked before posting and my boss always swaps the names back because 'it doesn't flow properly'
AIBU for always writing the woman's name first?

If you work in the public sector I reckon if you hold on long enough someone will realise the titles format is quite outdated. I would say better to spell out people's names completely eg.
Dear Julia Smith and Harry Smith

Who cares whether it flows, there's no question over who it's addressed to and less room for mistakes over titles.

The way it’s going… it will probably my be

Hi Jules and Haz!

I'd be alright with that.

Have I made 1600 comments on THIS subject? Nope. On the very many and varied subjects that DID interest me since I joined 10+ or so years ago, which you'd know from your advanced search 😂

Goodness - that really got your goat!

800 this year alone 😉

The tweedy pearl clutching replies are hysterical.
I hate Letters addressed to Mr and Mrs S Jones with S the husbands name. That should disappear

Could you repost one of these “tweedy Pearl clutching” responses you refer to.

I work in a school and write to parents many times every day. I would still use Mr & Dr if the mother is the doctor. Otherwise, Mr & Mrs Smith as a matter of convention, not that I have a personal belief that it should be this way.

Got MY goat? Am I searching you up sweety? 🤣🤣

Busy again?

Just the “odd comment” my arse 😂

You keep tagging me 🤣 the irony is astounding 🤣

But I never said I simply don’t have the time for all this and I only make the “odd comment”, did I?! 😂

Had I done so, then the “irony would be astounding”!

I said I don't have time to give a shit about whether Mr or Mrs appears first on post. But I'll always MAKE time to respond to my eager fans, it would be rude not to ❤️

And you regard yourself as just making “the odd comment”?

I suppose we all have different ideas on what “the odd comment means”. But 800 since the beginning of the year? 1600 in 18 months just under this user name… well, most of us would probably see that as a bit more than an “odd comment”

but whatever works for you!

Nah, the odd comment on here whilst waiting for my kids

roger that!

Oh dear - I won’t tag you in anymore. Seen you for some pretty serious shit going on based on your own thread. Sorry 💐

i will hide this so as not to post again if I forget.

I am a senior finance assistant and all my letters are checked before they leave the department

i don’t think this happens with the higher grades…

every letter from every member of staff is double checked by the post room as well….not info obviously just that the names and addresses match what they are supposed to

If the woman has taken her husband's surname, then she doesn't have any strong feminist beliefs around names, so I wouldn't worry about it.

If the woman has taken her husband's surname, then she doesn't have any strong feminist beliefs around names, so I wouldn't worry about it

people can change their minds, so they may now have strong feminist feelings around it

honestly, with a letter, I probably wouldn’t notice but I certainly wouldn’t have a problem with it if it were bought to my attention

It's true that many women do change their minds- I've seen so many express regret here and elsewhere that they took their husband's name without really thinking it through.

My husband and I are both Dr (with different surnames). My in-laws are Dr (MIL) and Mr (FIL) which has caused a great deal of confusion for some people.

OP you are an absolute QUEEN. I am so adopting this. Small blows to the patriarchy FTW

JSmithIloveyou
"Mr and Mrs is correct."

Why and who decided this?

Well, men, obviously. They are the most important, we are just possessions.