To think paramedics are patronising

[dontbeunreasonable]

First of all I think paramedics are absolutely amazing and I have so so much respect for the job they do. I personally know three and think very highly of them all.
However, when I watch 999 shows like 'Ambulance' etc the way they speak to elderly patients makes me cringe.
For example: last night I saw one where they went to home of an almost comatose man and the woman was all 'hello darling hold my hand' all perfectly fine and suitable as kindness is needed. But then she kept saying 'ooh Harold it's been a while since somebody has touched my knee' then kept repeating it to his family members who were coming in and out. Saying again 'ooh, don't disturb us he's touching my knee'!
I find this so disrespectful as the man was unable to speak but conscious and he may not have appreciated that kind of nonsense.
I know when my father was dying of cancer he would have absolutely hated all that carry on.
I keep seeing stuff like that when they talk to the elderly calling them sweetheart and 'oh I bet you still have all the lads after you' etc and I really think it's not on.
Side note: it often seems to be the ones from the north of England where I know the humour is very different to London. But there's a time and place isn't there?

Maybe its time to step away from the TV!

Well.they saved my 16 year-olds life six months arfo.so.I don't care how they speak, they recognized he was in DKA ( none of us knew he was disbetic)and stabilised him and got him to.hospital

Having worked in care homes were ambulances are regularly called, it can be a mixed bag between being very off with the patient or being patronising.

no in between in my experience

I have the upmost respect for paramedics and actually i dont find your example patronizing, i think they were trying to offer humor, comfort and ease in a potentially bad situation.

I have however twice been in a situation where i was around paramedics and thought they behaved like utter dicks and it really did surprise me.

It's like any profession different personalities approach the job differently.
As long as the important bit of saving lives is uppermost I don't really mind.
When I called the ambulance for my 92 year old df the crew were kind, respectful and reassuring and knew what they were doing, perfect imo.

I don't really know about paramedics, I've only had good experiences, but I think the way nurses dismiss elderly patients when they need to go to the toilet (specifically) and are calling out asking for help is abysmal.

As one example, I was in A+E on a trolley at the ambulance intake a few weeks ago as I had a sudden acute infection, and the trolley next to mine was a very elderly lady who told four different nurses that she needed the toilet, they all fobbed her off, then she started crying because they'd left her so long she wet herself, then she told every passing member of staff how sorry she was that she'd wet herself, she was so upset about it, and they just kept putting the urine-soaked blanket back over her even though she kept telling them that it was wet.

She got moved somewhere and a woman in her late eighties took her place in the intake queue (I was right at the front on one side of the corridor, and hearing all the dates of birth during handovers). She said she needed the toilet and was fobbed off for 30 minutes so they clearly hadn't learned. No care, compassion and dignity.

I know the nurses were probably frazzled and hungry in the early afternoon but my own treatment was totally different.

I wouldn't say paramedics specifically, but yes there is definitely a patronising manner some health/Care professionals adopt with elderly people

It used to make my mother furious. Both on her behalf but also when it happened to my Dad, who had dementia, as he was always a very dignified man and it was demeaning.

You can be kind, reassuring, etc without talking to grown adults as if they are toddlers.

Paramedics saved my life when i had an ectopic pregnancy so however they get the job done is fine with me. If these were paramedics from the north perhaps the people they were attending were used to that level of friendliness.

They can't be liked by everyone, they're there to do a job.

I've had various levels of rapport with nurses, doctors etc. Love the brisk and matter of fact ones, but I understand that that would be completely wrong for other people.

I've had two experiences of paramedics and they were absolutely amazing.

Having said that, I would agree that some/lots of healthcare professionals can be patronising/dismissive to the elderly and to people in general. I have noticed it but not specifically paramedics.

I think like most jobs there are good and bad and probably a culture when you've been doing something for a long time.

I was once told by a male paramedic that I didn't have swine flu.

I was 7 months pregnant and my GP did a home visit and called an ambulance as I had all the symptoms of swine flu.

Paramedics showed up, looked at me and said "sorry love but you don't have swine flu, I've seen grown men with it and they could barely stand".

He then basically refused to bring me to hospital because I would be waiting for hours and there was no point.

DH ended up bringing me to A&E where it was confirmed I did have swine flu. I was placed in isolation for five days and was so worried about my unborn baby. Thankfully she was fine but it was a scarey time. I still get pissed of when I think about paramedics attitude.

I think society generally has quite a patronising attitude to older people and people with disabilities. I cringe when I hear the way some people speak to people in either of those groups.

I think perhaps the paramedics try to joke and be light hearted to reassure people in situations which are often stressful and worrying and maybe the joking doesn't always land well.

I guess they’re doing their best to make often frightened/stressed people who are injured/poorly feeling as comfortable as possible under very stressful circumstances. Some people might appreciate that type levity, or at least appreciate the distraction.

Paramedics have to spend a lot of their time acting, so in a non life threatening situation which isn't really the job they signed up for- maybe give them a break for a jokey lighthearted attitude..

YABVVU.

YABU
I actually think comedy and light bedside manner is so important.

I'll preface this with the fact that I'm no paramedic but I am a first aider and have more than once been in a situation where the casualty has been badly hurt and I'm trying to keep them conscious and/or responsive whilst also trying to calm any family/friends who are with them.

The easiest way to do so is to keep it light and so a few jokes/light-hearted comments keep things ticking over while waiting for help to arrive. Yes it can seem patronising but when you're busy trying to save someone's life you're not really thinking much about how deep the conversation is so you use anything to keep your monologue/the discussion going.

Yabu, they will be taking clues from the family and the individual and will adapt their manner accordingly - most of us who work with the elderly learn that it not one size fits all, some families you have light hearted banter with, others it's more professional. There's also regional differences

Only ever had extremely good experiences with paramedics, every one has been an amazing human being when I’ve been at my most scared and vulnerable. I cannot say the same about nurses, many of which have been cold and heartless, no idea what made them want to ‘care’ for the sick, they clearly don’t have an aptitude for it

There's a bit of light banter but the Carry On Matron stuff is a bit off.Yanbu.

My husband is 79 and in very poor health. He has had to be taken to hospital a couple of times, and picked up from the floor after falls. He's never been treated like that. I do know that if my Dad had been treated like that he'd have been really embarrassed. He was never flirty, always very respectful to women. In fact when I attended a Regimental Reunion with him and my Mum, he suddenly said he was just going back to their room for something. He'd spotted the official photographer coming in with two "Bunny Girls". He didn't want to have them on his knees for photos, but didn't want to embarrass them by refusing.

Last year when both my parents were dying and saw a lot of paramedics and other medical professionals I have to say the paramedics were the shining light. At times I could have wept for their kindness and professionalism. Not so all of the other nurses and doctors we saw. But paramedics were amazing across the board.

I suppose you can't please everyone. Maybe some people wouldn't appreciate the humour we see on Ambulance but many do seem to. Better than being dour and poe-faced I suppose.

My grandmother passed away a while ago in her late-90's. She was very sharp and independent till the end. However needed some support due to sudden partial blindness. Some healthecare employees were really condescending and talked to her like she was a child. Some understood to adjust immediately to talking to an adult. Some did not.

My experience with ambulance has wither been neutral (which I count as a positive) but unfortunately my friend was treated terribly. She was having a stroke but I think they assumed she was drunk and on drugs so they did not have an ounce of sympathy until rest of us told them off. But when I've been a patient they have read the situation and how to act very well

I can remember as a very young nurse back in the 80’s I looked after a lady who was none communicative after a stroke, I can remember saying to her ‘let’s sort out that hair otherwise she’ll never get a boyfriend’ or somthing similar, well after having no communication she burst out laughing proper belly laugh, this was the beginning of her regaining some speech. It has stayed with me all these years. Sometimes in the most dire circumstances humour & normality is readily appreciated. I hope I made a difference.