To think I TECHNICALLY didn't do anything wrong?

[eeekkeee]

I share a 10 year old with my ex. Me and my ex were together for a very short period of time. Around 2 years and it was clear we would never work as we just didn't get on as a couple.

We haven't been together in 9 years and in that time he has had a serious relationship and other flings etc. Me and my ex have a very good co parenting relationship.

A few months ago me and one of my exes 'friends' ended up chatting online. He wasn't a good friend of my ex's. They hung out occasionally but they weren't like childhood friends etc. I met up with this guy once and then didn't see him again.

I have just received a text off my ex, basically this guy has told my ex everything and is offering him screen shots of our conversation. I'm sure he will conveniently leave out the sexts and nudes he was sending me.

My ex has just said it's all very odd and I have no idea why this guy has suddenly out of the blue decided to tell my ex this information.

However, AIBU to basically think I technically haven't done anything wrong? I can speak to who I like and we've been split up long enough that this shouldn't matter?

Weird behaviour from the friend.

It's none of your ex's business. You haven't done anything wrong as long as your child isn't affected.

But the friend is weird so maybe he's worried about that?

I don't think your ex sounds annoyed-just rightly baffled. I think it's good that he told you. Don't contact the other man unless you want to tell him that if he shares pictures of you you'll report him to the police. Then just shrug and move on.

Men’s rights activist? Wtf are you talking about? Telling a woman that her choices are a ‘bad idea’, when she didn’t ask for an opinion on that, in a manner equal to telling off a child, is the behaviour you should be accusing as that of a ‘mens rights activist’.
Women are free to make their own decisions you know. They don’t need instructing by other women with outdated opinions.

Well I don't think your ex is exactly implying you did anything wrong but I would say he thinks you have a right to know if someone is willing to send screen shots of your private conversation so I would say your ex has done the correct thing in letting you know. I suppose wants important is how your ex responds. Hopefully he says something along the lines of "no I don't need to see screen shots because it's none of my business"

It's tricky how to handle this because what are the screen shots he was going to send ? If he was going to forward on nudes of you then that is classed as revenge porn and it's illegal.

Did he have some sort of weird grudge against your ex?

I don't think it's at all prudish or MRAish to say don't send nude pictures to people you barely know. Of course it's entirely the man's fault if he shares them- but men are frequently arseholes. And the pictures are out there-and will remain out there forever.

@MightySprout i will give you benefit of the doubt that you didn’t actually read the Poster’s comment rather than you lack the ability to understand

No I didn't reject him, we just stopped talking. He was a bit of a dick to be honest and it just fizzled out. No big drama.

Ex said the guy was drunk and called him and told him this but has now blocked my ex. I am assuming he sobered up, was mortified and that's why he has blocked him.

Where has OP said she’s worried? Her AIBU is not about whether she should have sent the messages, it’s about her ex being annoyed with her.

You all just sound patronising.

I’d still message Rob and tell him that you will be contacting the police for alluding that he will be sharing pictures of you.

Nobody has said you should send nudes though!

Never send nudes - especially to someone you only end up meeting once! He could do anything with them!

Sheer curiosity because I’ve never sent nudes of myself (and the world is thankful!) what do you actually send? Close ups of your twat? A breast shot? Full body minus head?

Whatevs

I've read OP's posts and stand by what I said. Sending nudes is daft - face showing or not. Each to their own I guess.

Why on earth did you explain yourself?

You're single

I'd have told him to mind his own business.

😂
I'm lost for words on people thinking that sending nude photos is actually acceptable. Also on advising ones daughter on the correct way to do it.

Well said.

I've never sent anyone so much as a picture of my big toe but I can still see that people berating OP is bizarre, she hasn't asked of it was ok to send the messages.

@Theblacksheepandme it's like drugs. I would never encourage my daughter to take drugs and will of course speak to her about the dangers of doing so. But ultimately, when she is an adult, it is her choice so harm reduction is surely better than being naive to the fact that she may try them? It's the same with nudes, of course I won't encourage and will warn her of dangers etc. but as an adult it is her choice. So yes, I will teach my daughter that should she decide to send a nude/nudes to make sure her face isn't in it and there is no identifiable stuff in the photo. I think that's sensible parenting as you know, children do grow up and are their own person and do what they want to do regardless of mums opinion.

Oh get a grip. Stop acting like this is an unusual or outrageous thing for an adult to do. She didn’t ask for opinions on what you think about her sending nudes. She’s an adult who presumably knows the potential consequences of sending nudes.

Doesn’t this thread sort of prove… she didn’t consider “the consequences” 😐

So you didn’t include your face?

How does it prove that? Because wanker Rob has told her ex and wanker ex thinks he still owns OP's body?

That you should send nudes to people you hardly know because you don’t know how unhinged they are.

this thread proves that the op did not think through the consequences!

Should NOT

Exactly

No, it doesn’t. Because she didn’t ask for anybody’s opinions on whether she should or should not have sent nudes. She is asking a completely different question.