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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Village food competition

262 replies

Sweepies · 01/09/2023 14:14

This is mostly light-hearted, my village has a very large "show" every year with many tents, food vans, entertainment etc. They have the standard exhibitions you can enter, for photography, flower arranging, longest carrot, most attractive onion, etc.

I decided to enter one of the baking competitions with a friend to see if either one of us would place 1st, 2nd or 3rd. The prize for 1st place is £3! So all to play for as you can imagine.

The category was a baked item using ready made puff pastry, I decided to make a "posh" bacon and cheese turnover using some nice bacon, brie and cranberry - finished it off with sesame seeds. My friend made some kind of chorizo twist thing.

After entering it I noticed there we're probably about 15 entries in all, including a rival bacon and cheese turnover though it looked like something from Greggs - I wasn't too worried.

After judging was over and a couple of drinks we went to see the results, neither of us placed, and the bloody rival bacon and cheese turnovers won - but what really annoyed me was the judge hadn't tried a single thing!

Most (not all) items had been sliced in half once (??) but nothing tried. I assume they were sliced to see the quality of the pastry - but as we were told to use ready made pastry that seemed a bit redundant.

I thought okay fair enough, maybe the judge doesn't like puff pastry - but it was the same for every food item. The cake category, pies, salads, sandwiches, wraps - nothing was tasted, just cut in half once.

So Mrs. Judge wouldn't have known my posh pastry contained bloody expensive bacon, brie and cranberry as it never entered her mouth. This, to me, seems to go against the spirit of the competition. If I'd known it went on looks alone I'd have put a lot more effort into how it looked and not how it tasted.

All previous years, even after coming out of covid, at least a small portion of the food was tried, so maybe it's just the judge. Or maybe it's me, expecting too much from a cooking competition.

So, AIBU?

OP posts:
Thread gallery
16
JobMatch3000 · 02/09/2023 10:21

fireplacetiles · 02/09/2023 08:03

Went to a big village show last weekend with dozens of categories, one of which was "Favourite Tea towel bought or made" along side a pile of tatty old tea towels, think I might enter that next yearGrin

Love this!

Stayfreshcheesebag · 02/09/2023 10:29

I was up till 1.30am making my cheese scones and blueberry muffins for the county show today. As fresh as possible. Then left home at 6am to deliver them in time for judging.

Entered 6 classes in all, but my word it was busy, very stiff competition....going in shortly to see the results. I'll keep you posted!

JamMakingWannaBe · 02/09/2023 10:42

baffledcoconut · 02/09/2023 05:08

There is a local show next weekend and you have inspired me to partake. I’ll involve the child too. Will report back. 🤣

Please do! I think people are put off because they don't have giant or perfect veg. It's just the fun of taking part. Mine were definitely not 1st here - not did I expect them to be!!

Alycidon · 02/09/2023 10:58

Sweepies · 01/09/2023 14:40

Glad to see I'm not totally bonkers! And in answer to the comments about a fix; all the entrants names were supposedly hidden, so I think the judge just had a bit of an aversion to....well, judging. Here is a pic post slicing. The top most bacon and cheese turnovers won first place, the rather....well done....onion pie thing won second place. Apparently one slice is all it takes to judge the quality!

The onion thing looks foul.

IHateWasps · 02/09/2023 11:01

The onion thing looks foul.

It looks better in the pic that the person who made it posted on here.

Alycidon · 02/09/2023 11:03

IHateWasps · 02/09/2023 11:01

The onion thing looks foul.

It looks better in the pic that the person who made it posted on here.

I was including both pics - in the close-up it looks like blood clots.

Original poster
Sweepies · 02/09/2023 11:05

OnionTarteDisaster · 02/09/2023 07:22

Erm...is now a good time to come forward as the owner of the burned monstrosity/cow pat looking thing?! I've love to say it's just an unfortunate angle in the photo but I'm as bemused as everyone else as to how it came third (not second, I bloody wish! That would have got me an extra 50p!)

In my defence, it's meant to be a caramelised onion tarte tartin, so is supposed to be a little burned looking...I definitely didn't get distracted gossiping with my sister and overcooked it

Commiserations, @Sweepies, my lemon curd and favourite dessert entry didn't place either. We can go and drown our sorrows in the pub, the one that's open 😉

Omg I did wonder if this thread would be discovered 😅 I’m sorry! A respectable third place 🥉 I’d have deffo eaten it I’m just bitter that the bloody judge didn’t. Pub it is 🍻

OP posts:
Original poster
Sweepies · 02/09/2023 11:07

feralunderclass · 02/09/2023 07:40

Am I the only one thinking that all of the entries look terrible? I'm no Delia but bloody hell 😅 And OP is allegedly a chef? <lighthearted>

Ex 🥲 I’m in marketing now, probably for the best, at least I can market my entry!

OP posts:
IHateWasps · 02/09/2023 11:08

It looks like a caramelised onion tart to me in the close up. I really want one now.

BeatenByAScone · 02/09/2023 11:08

OnionTarteDisaster · 02/09/2023 09:35

Ooh, I love this idea, I'll obviously have to wear some sort of fancy judge's hat and costume (that's a thing, right?!) whilst doing my online judging. I'll start practicing my passive-aggressive feedback phrases now. I did see one comment from the judges about a knitted item that said something like, 'This item appears to have been made with acrylic rather than wool. Shame.' which really tickled me!

Thanks @FuckoffeeBeforeCoffee ❤you can have a slice of my unpoisoned, overcooked tarte any time. But none for Gretchen Weiner/@LadyEloise1!

Haven't worked out if I know the OP actually, @ButterRoad but it's a tiny village so highly likely. Maybe we should orchestrate a meeting outside the local tea room. I could wave around an onion and she could be holding a wheel of brie!

I am LOVING all the tales of local village show drama and the fact that this happens up and down the country! I would especially like more details about the ferret/dog entry please.

Show quote history

Since you've brought up the 'acrylic versus wool' I'm preparing myself for further indignance when I pop along in about an hour to see how my beret has done. It's knitted in a very lovely 100% British wool yarn, dyed in-house by the vendor. The knitted dolls in the same class are of course knitted in garish acrylic yarns.

Ofcourseshecan · 02/09/2023 11:14

2PintsOfCidernaBagofCrisps · 01/09/2023 16:44

Maybe the judge has read the Agatha Raisin book about the poisonous quiche that killed the judge at the village fair. Maybe they don't think it's worth the risk 😉

Yes, I thought of this at once! I’m surprised it doesn’t happen in real life after reading this thread😂

zingally · 02/09/2023 11:34

I'd feel the same OP! I would just try and shrug it off, but then don't bother entering next year. Or enter with one from the supermarket, and see how it does!

I had a skills-based competition happen through my work. I won't get into the details, as it's fairly outing. But absolutely hand on heart, being deadly serious, my entry was by FAR the best. Just, superior in every way. I looked at all the other entries, and was really confident that mine was the best by far.
It was getting judged by a guy from head office, who I'd met perhaps twice at that point, so didn't know him well. Anyway, he chose the winner as someone who he knows really well, who he interacts with often. I went back to look at her entry, and it was shite!! No comparison. I was furious.

Anyway, my company is big on sharing best practice via our internal message board (we run across multiple sites), and until then I'd been a big poster on there. Happy to share ideas and good practice, as it's an area I'm really experienced in.

Needless to say, since then, I haven't posted once. If they don't see me as an above average employee, I will no longer BE an above average employee.

ifIwerenotanandroid · 02/09/2023 12:51

Something upthread reminded me of another flower arranging incident. The class title: 'A Study in Yellow'. Spring show, so lots of entries with yellow daffodils etc. What won? The only non-yellow entry - three bright orange gerbera just stuck in a vase.

Judged by the 6-legged spider woman, of course. She was the only judge they ever used.

ifIwerenotanandroid · 02/09/2023 13:04

BeatenByAScone · 02/09/2023 11:08

Since you've brought up the 'acrylic versus wool' I'm preparing myself for further indignance when I pop along in about an hour to see how my beret has done. It's knitted in a very lovely 100% British wool yarn, dyed in-house by the vendor. The knitted dolls in the same class are of course knitted in garish acrylic yarns.

Show quote history

Can we have a photo of the beret, please? Love a bit of good knitting. Hope you've won!

Sometimes you can lose by being too good. I put craft items into a very strictly run local market. My painted flowers were disallowed because 'another lady already does dried flowers, so you can't do dried flowers as well'. Nice to know my painting is so realistic. I argued my case but they wouldn't budge. I guess they wouldn't believe the flowers were painted.

And once, for the Open Gardens Day teas in the village hall, I made some cupcakes with prefect swirly frosting & bought exquisite garden-themed decorations to sit on the frosting. (I'd just learnt how to make these then-fashionable cupcakes so was very enthusiastic & careful to get them just right). All the visitors refused to buy one on the grounds that they were so perfect they were obviously shop-bought!

SlightlygrumpyBettyswaitress · 02/09/2023 13:09

My oldest dc refused to do cooking at gcse after the teacher gave her a lower mark than her friend for a similar reason.
Apparently hers "looked better'.

JudgeJ · 02/09/2023 13:17

Sweepies · 01/09/2023 14:14

This is mostly light-hearted, my village has a very large "show" every year with many tents, food vans, entertainment etc. They have the standard exhibitions you can enter, for photography, flower arranging, longest carrot, most attractive onion, etc.

I decided to enter one of the baking competitions with a friend to see if either one of us would place 1st, 2nd or 3rd. The prize for 1st place is £3! So all to play for as you can imagine.

The category was a baked item using ready made puff pastry, I decided to make a "posh" bacon and cheese turnover using some nice bacon, brie and cranberry - finished it off with sesame seeds. My friend made some kind of chorizo twist thing.

After entering it I noticed there we're probably about 15 entries in all, including a rival bacon and cheese turnover though it looked like something from Greggs - I wasn't too worried.

After judging was over and a couple of drinks we went to see the results, neither of us placed, and the bloody rival bacon and cheese turnovers won - but what really annoyed me was the judge hadn't tried a single thing!

Most (not all) items had been sliced in half once (??) but nothing tried. I assume they were sliced to see the quality of the pastry - but as we were told to use ready made pastry that seemed a bit redundant.

I thought okay fair enough, maybe the judge doesn't like puff pastry - but it was the same for every food item. The cake category, pies, salads, sandwiches, wraps - nothing was tasted, just cut in half once.

So Mrs. Judge wouldn't have known my posh pastry contained bloody expensive bacon, brie and cranberry as it never entered her mouth. This, to me, seems to go against the spirit of the competition. If I'd known it went on looks alone I'd have put a lot more effort into how it looked and not how it tasted.

All previous years, even after coming out of covid, at least a small portion of the food was tried, so maybe it's just the judge. Or maybe it's me, expecting too much from a cooking competition.

So, AIBU?

Our village fete had a Gentlemen's Baking section, apparently not now allowed in these 'enlightened' days, and my late OH had won the year before for his lemon drizzle cake, following the official recipe. The next year they were given a recipe for a chocolate cake, his first couple of efforts came out looking cracked and dry but as his friends said their efforts looked the same her entered one of them. On the day all the entries bar one looked much the same, the odd one looked fresh out of an M and S box and no prizes for guessing which one won!

JudgeJ · 02/09/2023 13:20

I'd be more pissed off at the bullshit first prize. 3 fuckin quid??!

You get monetary prizes??? Rosettes only for us!

Vitriolinsanity · 02/09/2023 13:21

Was the winner either a) head of the WI b) head of the PTA?

I came 2nd with my chicken liver pate. It was cut-throat, but I won a rose bush.

Less pressure in the Masterchef final.

StefanosHill · 02/09/2023 13:22

Vitriolinsanity · 02/09/2023 13:21

Was the winner either a) head of the WI b) head of the PTA?

I came 2nd with my chicken liver pate. It was cut-throat, but I won a rose bush.

Less pressure in the Masterchef final.

Less pressure in the Masterchef final.

ha ha

JudgeJ · 02/09/2023 13:30

This was 1970s and the latest fad in handwriting was italics.

Sounds like Ruth Fagg, I used to love it but it was quite hard to learn.

JudgeJ · 02/09/2023 13:38

If you want strict judging better join the WI, they have a rule book for county shoes etc. And there is most definitely tasting of food entries.

Really? The chocolate cake recipe I referred to up thread was from the WI and it was the WI judge who decided than the 'winner' was the only entry that differed from all the rest.

JudgeJ · 02/09/2023 13:43

ElizabethBest · 02/09/2023 00:31

I had never lived in rural England until about a decade ago when we moved to a little village on the South Coast. My husband, on the other hand, grew up in a small village. He BEGGED me not to enter a cake into the village show our first year. I thought it would seem like poor form not to take part. How wrong I was! My fraisier cake won first prize and if looks could kill I’d have dropped dead on the spot. A decade later and there are STILL people who pointedly snub me at village events. DH has really enjoyed his 10 years of “I told you so”! Grin

Not a tale from the fete but the pub quiz, when we'd just moved into the village we went into the pub on quiz night and decided to enter. We won first prize and it wasn't a popular victory although we were asked to join a few teams, a bit like Harry Kane!

Anotherchristianmama · 02/09/2023 13:44

Tom Barnaby will be along shortly

Vitriolinsanity · 02/09/2023 14:00

HOTY vs Scone. Scone wins.

How is that even plausible, except in a Village Fair?

Sinamin · 02/09/2023 14:01

gelatogina · 02/09/2023 07:47

Yes you definitely won the dullest post on the thread. No need to suck all the fun out of the hilarious fact a horse lost to a scone.

Show quote history

It's not hilarious, it's a fucking outrage.

I was purely explaining the whys and wherefores of proper judging so I don't understand your nasty attitude to me.

Did you miss my decorated wellie and heaviest turnip post? If you really feel the need to be randomly nasty please do it on another thread because apart from your contribution this thread is utterly lovely.