Village food competition

[Sweepies]

This is mostly light-hearted, my village has a very large "show" every year with many tents, food vans, entertainment etc. They have the standard exhibitions you can enter, for photography, flower arranging, longest carrot, most attractive onion, etc.

I decided to enter one of the baking competitions with a friend to see if either one of us would place 1st, 2nd or 3rd. The prize for 1st place is £3! So all to play for as you can imagine.

The category was a baked item using ready made puff pastry, I decided to make a "posh" bacon and cheese turnover using some nice bacon, brie and cranberry - finished it off with sesame seeds. My friend made some kind of chorizo twist thing.

After entering it I noticed there we're probably about 15 entries in all, including a rival bacon and cheese turnover though it looked like something from Greggs - I wasn't too worried.

After judging was over and a couple of drinks we went to see the results, neither of us placed, and the bloody rival bacon and cheese turnovers won - but what really annoyed me was the judge hadn't tried a single thing!

Most (not all) items had been sliced in half once (??) but nothing tried. I assume they were sliced to see the quality of the pastry - but as we were told to use ready made pastry that seemed a bit redundant.

I thought okay fair enough, maybe the judge doesn't like puff pastry - but it was the same for every food item. The cake category, pies, salads, sandwiches, wraps - nothing was tasted, just cut in half once.

So Mrs. Judge wouldn't have known my posh pastry contained bloody expensive bacon, brie and cranberry as it never entered her mouth. This, to me, seems to go against the spirit of the competition. If I'd known it went on looks alone I'd have put a lot more effort into how it looked and not how it tasted.

All previous years, even after coming out of covid, at least a small portion of the food was tried, so maybe it's just the judge. Or maybe it's me, expecting too much from a cooking competition.

So, AIBU?

I will never get over my SIL's village fete when I made the most amazing Victoria sponge cake for the competition, arrived 5 mins before we were told the competition closed, to find out we were "too late for judging" and they had judged early!

I was furious! So furious that my MIL ended up buying my full cake for us to take up to eat because I refused to pay them any money for it!

I haven't entered since and it happened in 2018!

There are hunter classes in showing. So the OP will have a show hunter of a particular weight (flat class) or a working hunter (jumping class). It's not a breed, it's a type. The OP referred to her horse as a hunter as this is the class he will have competed it.

@Sweepies I must say that your turnovers look cowing lush as we say in south Wales

I almost don’t dare post this, but I’m the Show Secretary for our village show, for my sins (never volunteer to ‘lend a hand’ by the way; before you know it that will be interpreted as quite literally ‘running the show’ as the previous Show Secretary runs for the hills cackling manically).

Shows bring out the crazy in everybody. It’s glorious. From the monthly committee meetings (think Vicar of Dibley) which are a seething hotbed of arguments about typography and the perennial question of “what are we going to do about the judges”, to the allegations of fixing, brutal disqualifications and judges notes, and recriminations about Nicola’s dog eating an unattended crystallised fruit entry and getting the shits behind the marquee. It’s all bonkers.

The judging is honestly anonymous though. I promise! Or it is in our village anyway - I steward the judging and whilst I often disagree heartily with their ‘eccentric’ decisions, they do spend years training to be a judge and take it very, very seriously. Sadly they are literally a dying breed (horticultural ones anyway). Ours are in their nineties. Go to, enter and enjoy your shows now while you can; Village horticultural societies are closing every years due to the lack of judges and difficulty recruiting volunteers to organise the shows. So actually, ignore my first paragraph about not offering to lend a hand - please do! It’s mad but it’s lots of fun, as this thread demonstrates.

@VenusClapTrap brilliant post and as crazy as they are they are part of what makes a local community. I love entering our local show ,although I remain bitter about my chutney being disqualified this year!

My daughter won a trophy for "Best Overall Exhibit" in the junior section this weekend. Very proud parents. My entries won naff all!

Wait- you don't just take your entry back home? You have to buy it?

Normally yes, you collect your entries at the end and take them home. Not sure why pp had to buy it, unless they are automatically considered donations to the tea and cake tent at their show, or something.

At ours you wmeuther collect by a certain time or they go in the auction.

A giant marrow sold for over a hundred pounds!

@AllTheAll the food entries we considered donations for people to then buy so they could raise money from it

This is actually pretty standard - which is odd. I do a lot of village shows as I'm a bit of a competitive cook/gardener. Most of the time, no one eats them. Even the winning ones look rubbish sometimes, so if it's not taste, I can't imagine what they are basing the decision on, other than bake, but that doesn't look amazing either.

That explains so much! If they're to be sold, then yes you don't want a slice taken out by a judge.

But judges should actually taste food items to properly judge! What a conundrum at the Village! What a scandal there would be if first went to Pamela Shrewsbury for her beautiful sherry trifle. Marjorie Hammersworth bought it and discovered that it was made with shave cream!

Updates at 4 as we head to the village pub for the final battle!