Shouted at on the bus

[Pinklady1982830]

So bit upset this morning just looking to see what others think of this.
So this morning I had to go shopping with my 2 dc boy age 2 and girl age 6. Boy was in the pushchair.
After we finished shopping I decided we would get the bus home as my shopping was heavy so just easier to get bus home. Anyway we got on the bus and there was already a big buggy on the other side which was fine so I parked my buggy on the opposite side and my dd sat on the seat next to the buggy While I sat down in the disabled elderly seat also next to the buggy. Well a few stops on a lady also gets on with this very big pushchair there is no way she was going to fit in the opposite bay so she squeezed in right in the alise next to me. Not even giving me a chance to move my pushchair so she could try squeeze in next to me. Anyway the driver takes off while she is stood in the aslie with her buggy which surprises me as I always thought you were not allowed to do that, when this old lady shouts you can't put the bugy there! It's in the way! Obviously she gets ignored so shuts up
Then while while she is getting up to leave she turned to me and said
"Your disgusting you should of moved your pushchair so she could get into the spot and moved your daughter off that bloody seat so that woman could sit down!"
Bear in mind I had tried to move my buggy but literally could not move it due to the space. I was so shocked

She then said I should be ashamed of myself! So I lost it by then and replied "how about you mind your own business!" But she was still ranting at me as she got off the bus!
Not going to lie I did actually feel.like bursting into tears as I have lot going on at the moment and that just set me right over the edge. So I'm just Asking was I in the wrong here? Thanks if you made it this far

She’s a crank. You did nothing wrong, don’t let her upset you. Some people are so unhappy in their lives they take any excuse to have a go at other people.

Oh love, no you were not in the wrong and she was being horrible. She probably has stuff going on herself, anyway. Never right to rant at another person without taking the time to understand what's happened - she wasn't right to rant, I mean. And you stuck up for yourself, good for you. Put it behind you. All over. Stress. There's SUCH a lot of it about.

I can't quite figure out if you were in the wrong or not, but no, she should not have spoken to you like that.

To speak to someone like that and call them "disgusting", I'm guessing she has her own issues and it wasn't really about you.

Try not to let it bother you.

It's her, not you.

Don't let her take up your headspace.

Smile and ignore.

My partner is a coach driver and I accompany him on several trips. I get to see people moan and rant about absolutely nothing ! Getting in a state over the slightest “wrong” is an understatement.
Just ignore the crank - lunatic 😂

That was her being a miserable and spiteful cow. Ignore. Feel bad for her. Imagine what a shit life lacking in love you must have to want to shout at strangers about pram logistics!

If the driver hadn't immediately started moving then you could have had the opportunity to speak to the woman with the buggy to work out where you'd both go. It sounds like a really unsafe experience but that's on the driver not you.

You did nothing wrong.

Buses where I am have a 2 buggy limit so imo the bus driver shouldn't have allowed her on. And explained there wasn't room and she would have to wait for the next bus.

I think I probably would have put the 6 year old on my lap so the woman could sit down, but those buses aren’t really built for more that two push chairs. You wouldn’t have had anywhere to move it to.

Deep breath, roll your eyes and tell yourself that she’s just an angry woman who needed to make herself feel better by being horrible to someone else. It wasn’t you, specifically. Anyone would have done.

Entirely her problem- she doesn't sound like a pleasant person at all. As others have said don't let her take up any of your headspace! You did nothing wrong. Hope your day improves

I remember when dd was a baby and I was on a bus with her pushchair. There was nobody else on the bus besides us and an older man who was already on when I got on.
He kept looking at me and tutting and even muttered "disgusting" under his breath, I turned to him and said do you have a problem with a woman and a baby on a bus? Not my finest moment but I was sleep deprived, he never said anything after that

Bit unclear as to the logistics or why she was telling you off.

Presuming no elderly or disabled people needed the seat you were in, so then anyone could sit in it (until of course someone did need to sit there, at which point you'd obviously have moved)

The other woman does sound like she was blocking the gangway or did she then find a seat?

I also agree that had the driver waited until everyone was safely seated somewhere the incident would have been avoided.

Some people are just arseholes. Doesn’t matter if they’re young, old, male, female, whoever. She is one of them.

You did nothing wrong, you tried your best. I know it’s really hard to get past when these things get stuck in your head and you keep going back over the incident, but just try to reassure yourself you didn’t deserve that treatment. 💐

Thank you all for the replies in hindsight yes I should of put my daughter on my lap which is totally on me.
I was just so shocked at the way she spoke to me whatever happened to be kind 😕 I was literally just digging my nails in my hands on the bus to stop myself from crying
But now going to move on xx

You did nothing wrong and you handled it pretty well, I think.

You encountered an arsehole. Give her no further headspace.

Yes they can drive with prams in the aisle the drivers round here let’s them stand between the doors 😏 saying that I do think you should have moved to create space as soon as you saw her getting on I don’t wait to be asked personally

I don’t understand how you didn’t have enough time to move if the other pram was parked and somewhat waiting in the aisle. I would have tried to move my pram over to make space, I can’t really see why you didn’t since you acknowledge you would need to move for her to go into the buggy area.

Reminds me of when an older woman abused me on the train when I was late teens early twenties. There was 2 seats opposite each other so 4 of us sitting in the space. She needed to get past me get off but the space was that tight I couldn't move my legs to let her pass. It was horrible. She picked on me cos I was younger and thought she could get away with it. I'm hindsight I should have said sombutvwas so shocked I stayed silent.

It's mainly the drivers fault for taking off with her in the Isle. I have been in similar situations, I'd have stood up and said to the lady "I'll move my buggy for you" and jiggled around until we all fit. Bit difficult with the bus moving though!

You didn't do anything wrong. She's an arsehole x

Sweeping generalisation there.

She is what one calls a "bus wanker".

It's the only reason I got my bus pass - so I could shout at people on the bus.
🙄

What ageist crap. 💥