Is teaching children to use cutlery no longer a thing?

[Pixieb34]

Genuine question…
Do parents of younger children teach them to use a knife and fork nowadays?
I’m a parent of older teens and I did, along with general table manners like eating with your mouth closed and waiting for others to start/finish.
Am I being old fashioned to think being able to eat food with a knife and fork is a basic skill, or is eating with fingers or just a fork or spoon what’s done nowadays?

DD is 4 and starting school next week. She can use cutlery properly but does still struggle to cut some things up with a knife (kids knives are soooo blunt). Also when she's tired she will sometimes give up with the cutlery and use her fingers because it's quicker. I gently encourage her back to the cutlery but I'm not too worried at this age.

Well I see plenty of adults who can't use a knife and fork properly so I assume it's no longer a thing to teach kids!

Do you really only eat food as a family that doesn't need a knife and fork?
So no sausage and mash, spaghetti Bolognese, chop and chips, shepherds pie etc etc.

It's hard to know. To be honest, I don't know what the proper expectation is for dexterity etc at different ages. My 8 year old uses cutlery after a fashion but I don't think she does it very well. But the knife and fork for adults is really too big for her to hold and use properly while the small children's ones are too small.

I can't remember at what point I was able to do it but I do know my mother was very keen on it and I certainly do try to impress on her how we don't use fingers, which piece of cutlery goes in which hand, how to hold it and where to place it when we're finished and it's the how to hold it part that is causing difficulty. However, it is like watching a cavegirl handle rudimentary tools at times.

When we took the scouts away many of them struggled to butter bread. These kids are 11+ (they said their parents normally do it for quickness). So I can believe it.
This isn't parent bashing (I'm a parent) I understand being in a rush.
The beaver leaders then started focusing on implementing cutlery skills after covid as we noticed a decline too. Beavers are 6-8 yrs.
We don't have a dinner table as we don't have a table but my kids eat off lap trays. My son struggles to cut up food and he's 8 but I constantly get him to try. He sometimes eats with his fingers but I remind him to use his fork. We eat out a lot.

I was never taught and somehow I turned out ok? I'm sorry for being a heathen and not knowing which fork I should be using 😂

I often think when watching First dates that some of the young people look like they haven't been taught how to hold a knife and fork properly.

How sharp are your knives?? Baby knives are basically rounded ends with a bit of mild serration. Def no more harmful than a fork

We have a cultural difference in our house, my DH isn’t from Britain, rarely uses a knife and if he needs to he uses the cut and switch method.
My DD can use a knife and fork but due to SEN she rarely eats food that requires cutting and my youngest who also has SEN prefers to use his hands (he was weaned using the BLW method) or his dads method.
I have spent years trying to teach them how to use a fork and knife together but I like to choose my battles and this one has always seemed a bit pointless.

Strange, the only mums I know who’s children eat like animals don’t do anything resembling work and have all the time in the world .

My son would never eat those types of foods when he was little - he does now and will use a fork to do so, he was under a dietician until he was 8. (See my point about him having sen). My point was I think a lot of families just eat those kinds of foods all the time. Home cooking and eating things like stews / bolognaise / messier stuff isn’t as popular in many homes now so children just don’t learn to use cutlery like they used to.

@StephanieSuperpowers agreed! My DS struggles with the form and knife so he holds them like more like shovels than spears, if that makes sense? We keep correcting him (over and over...) but there is a fine line between teaching the manners and making family time miserable.

Other way here. My kids were taught to use cutlery and do at home, but told me they don't at school. They didn't have cutlery during covid at their nursery/ school (I guess possible contamination?) And so felt out of place using it. Skills went back hugely starting school!

This is the thing, I could do everything for my child for speed but I have to let her do stuff for herself, to teach her, you know as a parent should.

Do you really only eat food as a family that doesn't need a knife and fork?
So no sausage and mash, spaghetti Bolognese, chop and chips, shepherds pie etc etc.

I don’t think any of those meals require a knife, my husband would only use a fork!

My children use a nosebag or a trough, in the summer I simply scatter food on the floor and they peck at it like chickens...

They are one and three

There does seem to be a lot of families that don't eat together at mealtimes . I can't imagine why you would not want to all eat together .

The children I’m talking about Definitely don’t know how to use the cutlery, as when you show them it is very clear it’s not something they’re used to, rather than choosing not to.

Re BLW... DD learnt by copying so she used a fork and spoon quite early on and trying to use a knife not long after her first birthday. Had plastic knifes in with their playboy and they learnt with that!

I have sent many children not pick up various skills as their parents deem them to young for it... like a child going into Yr8 not allowed to walk to school alone (less than a mile), junior school children not allowed butter knives as they are dangerous etc.

As a Cub leader we expect them all to be able to use kitchen knifes under supervision, do their own washing up, cook on open fires... they all cope (physical disabilities aside but even then they try and we aid as necessary)

Just worry about your own kids.
I've got one who was taught and does & one who is shown, encouraged and helped to every single meal every day but prefers his hands. He's just for but in age 6-7 clothes as he's tall and the amount of comments I get because he doesn't use cutlery when out in public is a joke he's ND and easy dry foods and his hands are always cleaned the only place we've had no comments is from nursery he's encouraged there to eat how he wants as long as he'd eating.
Does me head in this. Maybe there is an over all laziness but don't paint all parents as lazy thanks

I don't use a knife for a lot of the type of meals I eat. I eat things like Mac and Cheese, Pasta, Rice etc dishes that only need a fork or spoon.
Baked Potato I mash up the potato with butter and cheese so don't really need a knife to eat it. Pizza, Hot dogs or Burgers in buns I eat with my hands.
Chips I have always eaten with my hands. Even if I have fish with my chips (which does require a knife) I eat the chips with my hands. It's my "thing" with chips. I have always done it.
I think it will make a difference in how a child will use a knife and fork depending on what food they eat at home.

More likely the lunch time supervisors. Not that I've experienced this as one. The same got said after covid. Not in my experience

Could it be partly due to the baby led weaning trend? Where they were encouraged to eat with their hands (....and make a huge mess...) Didn't that start about 10 years ago?
My 2 DC (3 and 5) are desperate at dinner time. Much prefer using their hands unless it's something 'wet' like slag Bol or curry. Obviously with cereal, yogurts etc. they'll use a spoon without being asked/prompted. But dinner time drives me nuts. If I had £1 for every time I yelled "use your knife and fork" I would be a multimillionaire.

My Dad taught myself and sisters.. l taught my daughters.. they taught their sons. Just watched This Morning and Rochelle Humes was eating a roast and holding her folk by the tip at such a strange angle so her wrist was twisted. I see this often in restaurants.. People in their teens / twenties/ thirties.. holding cutlery at awkward angles.. not knowing how to put their fork into food and cut correctly with the knife..
One of my pet hates.

😂