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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

AIBU to be shocked that they wouldn't let me get to my seat?

129 replies

Aquaphant · 29/08/2023 23:44

I recently went to see a comedy show at an arena with my husband and his parents. Our seats were in the center of the row, so I had to cross in front of people no matter which way I went. My husband was in the drinks queue and his parents were already seated, so I was on my own at this point.

The approach to our seats was totally congested with people on one side, and on the other side there was only a man (early 60s I'd guess) and two women (possibly his wife and daughter) sitting at the end of the row and then it was empty all the way down to our seats. The rows surrounding our row were pretty much fully seated at this point, so there was no easier way to access my seat.

I politely asked them if could please just squeeze by to get to my seat. He snapped "These seats are taken." I was confused by his response because I obviously wasn't asking for his seat or the empty seats right next to them and said "Oh I know, I just need to get by to get to my seat over there please" and gestured beyond them to my seats. He smirked and said "Then go the other way."

I was taken aback by this and even wondered if I was the unreasonable one because he was so confident about it, so I went back down the steps and back onto the concourse to find the way to reach my seats from the other direction. This was in a large arena so it was a bit of an ordeal to find the other way up.
The concourse was completely crammed full of people so I could barely move (it was horrible and I was legitimately worried about a crowd crush). I finally found the other way up to our section, but there was a long queue up the steps, the seats were all full at that end of our row already, and it just would have been a nightmare to navigate.

At this point I resolved to not be bullied and to go the way I had originally intended. I went back and again very politely asked them if I could please just get by to access my seat down the row and he again told me with a very snappy tone "These seats are taken" and told me to go the other way.

I said "No, I'll go this way thank you" and he snarled "Fine, piss off then" and he and the women with him dramatically stood up and shuffled out onto the steps, which wasn't even necessary as I could have just walked by them if they stood up in place. Trying to give the benefit of the doubt I thanked them, even though they were being incredibly awkward and nasty.

My in laws were sitting on the closer side and the seats right in front of them were empty, so I jumped down into the row below them when I reached them so I could climb up into my seat. At this point the man and women started shouting at me, saying "Oh, so now you can go around" and cursing at me and making rude gestures. I gestured back and my MIL and the women kept glancing at each other for the whole show. I don't ever get into altercations like this and it was just so strange to me. I was flustered and taken aback by the whole episode and couldn't fully enjoy the show and just wanted to leave.

What on Earth was that all about? Who gets cheap row end seats to a comedy show in giant arena and then acts like their VIP box is being invaded when a woman politely asks to get to her seat? I think it's worth noting that I'm fairly young and petite and I'm not originally from the UK (I have an accent), so I do have to wonder if that's why he decided to give me a hard time.

AIBU to think this interaction was completely bizarre, or is this considered normal behaviour in 2023?

OP posts:
toadasoda · 30/08/2023 18:02

I'm so sorry this happened to you OP. He was a prick.

Slightly besides the point but it really frustrates me that theatres make seats so close together that it creates this socially awkward situation. It should be possible to squeeze past a seated row, at least for an average sized person. Narrow aisles halfway along the row for access would eliminate half these problems. I know theatre owners would argue they lose money for these seats but i honestly think they would make it up with the amount of people who don't go because of these issues. My MIL for example can't get up and down but may need the bathroom so can only sit at the end seat if she arrives later than everyone and leaves early. Its so stressful that she just stopped going. I have heard tall people complain about legroom and bigger people complain about not being able to squash past, I'm sure there are many other examples.

starfishmummy · 30/08/2023 18:54

LaPerduta · 30/08/2023 04:55

Smmohrd??

Ha! I shouldn't type late at night. Damn insomnia. annoyed I think!

latetothefisting · 30/08/2023 19:14

ICanBuyMyOwnBooks · 30/08/2023 11:08

There's just been a big story all over the news about this. I'm surprised you didn't see it OP. It was a theatre showing The Crucible. In the end the police had to be called because it all became so fractious.
It's a fairly new phenomenon. Luckily I've never seen it when we've been at the theatre.
There was no need for the arsy comments about cheap end seats. There are lots of shows where the end seats are just as expensive as the centre ones; and people choose the end seats for accessibility reasons.

Yes I saw this. My favourite part was the random Kings Counsel they quoted who was surprised because they thought the type of audience attending the play wouldn't demonstrate such behaviours 😂

VioletVeeVee · 31/08/2023 00:32

I really never knew this was currently a ‘thing’!

It’s absolutely absurd, I mean totally nuts!

You will have to stand up or shift your legs for a moment, if you’re sitting in an aisle seat, be it plane, train, cinema, theatre, or even (god forbid) some tightly packed restaurants!

If you refuse to move you’re a dick!

DH is 6’5 and we often try to book aisle seats. He wouldn’t have a problem moving for anyone. There’s no time slot where you have to be sat in your allocated (middle) seat!

Who made aisle seat wanker judge and jury!

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