Why would an adult male be alone in the teaching pool?

[redrighthand83]

At my local leisure centre, there is the large main pool and then a shallow teaching pool which is around 100cm deep at the deepest section.

The teaching pool during the day is essentially the toddler pool. I have seen adults in the teaching pool earlier in the morning when it's quiet- and good on them, to build their confidence etc.

But the last few weekends at the busy sessions there's a man alone in his late 60s who just sits there in the corner watching everyone. I just can't imagine why he would choose to sit in a pool full of screaming and splashing children other than the more sinister reasons. I have tried to find the logic -e.g. he is entitled to use it but why would someone of retirement age only be able to use a pool on a Saturday lunch? Could he just be lonely and oblivious to the weird vibes it gives off?

Am I being unreasonable to ask the centre to perhaps look to separate lone adults using the teaching pool from the busier sessions with children?

Voting:

YABU: The world doesnt revolve around children
YANBU: This could be a safeguarding issue

Lane swimming is half the main pool. The other half is general swim which tends to be older kids and adults bobbing about chatting, Water is colder though, tbf.

You could always approach him in a friendly manner with a ‘it’s bloody hectic in here isn’t it! you in with your kids/grandkids? My lot are over there being a right menace!’
A lot in my opinion could be gauged by his reaction. If he’s friendly in return and says ‘oh yeah I don’t mind though as the water is so good for my knees/joints/back.’ If he’s unfriendly and weird or giving you bad vibes I think then you have reasonable cause to approach the centre manager.

So you are saying there is a weirdo at your local centre staring at people in the swimming pool?

I agree with you op. I think a lot of people on this thread are being incredibly naive.

Only if she wants to look ridiculous. Daft idea.

He is allowed to be there you don’t know what his reasons are. Would you say the same about a lone woman?

If its not a childs session, he has every right to be there. It would be wierd if he was trying to sneak into a kids session.
But a lone man, sitting enjoying the water in a public pool is not really a problem, nor should it be.

Men (or ANYONE before someone comes for me) who are creeping perverts when younger don't magically grow out of it once they hit 60. In fact, I suspect it only emboldens them, because they know that no one speaks up, or they play the age card.

WTAF @cakewench is 'playing the age card'?

Op, I'm with you. My ds is years past using the learners pool but when we used to go it was only ever people accompanying the dc in the pool - mym/dad/gp/Aunty etc or a combination of those. I don't know whether ir was a official or unspoken rule but i never ever saw a single person enter that pool. Why on earth would they without kids?? I think you're right to be worried Op especially if he's just standing and staring. The majority of men would avoid doing that as they would know it would look really inappropriate
I would raise ir with staff. If tge lifeguard doesn't help, go higher. There's a main pool , he can use that.

Agreed. It's blatantly odd.

I'm a middle-aged man and there's no way I'd choose to sit around in a pool full of children, so yes I agree with the OP that this seems dubious and is probably off-putting for many of the other pool users.

It's definitely very odd. Of all the places to sit and relax, he choses the corner of a kids swimming pool. Of course that's odd. You would be perfectly reasonable to raise it with the manager.

Just because he is "allowed" to be there doesn't mean its appropriate.

Although the points about older people using warm water to improve their mobility are valid, the OP is right to question the presence of a lone adult in a toddler pool.

There is a strong likelihood that it is about the mobility and that the thought it might make anyone uncomfortable hasn’t crossed the guy’s mind. But that doesn’t make it OK. The toddler pool is for toddlers and their accompanying adults. I’d mention it to the centre staff so that they can remind patrons that unaccompanied adults should not be using the toddler pool during family swim time.

I can’t help thinking that there is an opportunity here for leisure centres to market their toddler pools to the elderly during adult only swim times though!

It's not a woman though is it?
I don't understand why people like to act as if sex is irrelevant...

Funnily enough I do lane swimming in the week and there are very gentle water exercise classes that are predominantly all older women and it made me wonder why men don't attend? There probably is something of an opportunity for the centre to try and aim sone sessions that appeal to men.

9 out of 10 males would be aware of how inappropriate it would look for them sat alone in a child's pool and wouldn't do it.
It would be a cheap way for a paedophile to get a few kicks however.
Can't believe people on here.

Their gender isn't even relevant. Any person from about 18 plus, man or woman entering a kids pool without a child is weird. They would also usually be aware that it looks strange. Some pp's need to realise that sadly young women can be paedophiles too.

Of course they can be. Only a fool thinks otherwise.

But statistics do not lie. The demographic of someone most likely to commit a sexual crime in public against a child will be an older male.

I have a very clear memory of being in the shallow end of my local pool, practising using my goggles to swim underwater. I swam past a man with a very obvious erection (I was about 11 or 12, so I knew what one was). He too was just standing there, with a creepy smirk on his face.

If it looks dodgy, trust your gut. I don’t think many men suffering with their arthritis would choose to soak in the warmer baby pool, precisely because they know it would look suspicious.

I think age is actually very relevant here!

My grandparents have actually called the school their house borders and asked them to "get rid of the bushes on their side because they like to watch the children".

Absolutely creepy af, but I think the sense that watching children is absolutely fine is a generational thing?

This. In spades. Have people learnt nothing over the last decade?

Perhaps it's medical reasons. Perhaps the person who gives him a lift there can only go at that time. Perhaps his wife or daughter or the person who gives him a lift is swimming in the main pool at the same time. Perhaps they have other commitments such as work during the week.

YANBU at all to question this. I wonder how many of the obtuse posters have young kids who use these pools? I do and it's something I would definitely discreetly raise with the management. Why wouldn't you in order to protect your kids?

To all those saying YABU, how would you feel if it was your husband or dad doing this?

It's strange request that's for sure but it's not creepy really. Surely they mean that they like to watch the children playing and this is an innocent albeit extreme request. Some older people enjoy watching children play but but not usually to the point they seek them out or sit in a swimming pool watching them.

Perfectly happy, given I have an aged father and any well aware of his physical limitations and what gives him a modicum of pain relief. I also have small children.

Perhaps those seeing danger around every corner could stop viewing the world with such suspicion. Maybe take into account the perspectives of other people and consider their needs.