Why would an adult male be alone in the teaching pool?

[redrighthand83]

At my local leisure centre, there is the large main pool and then a shallow teaching pool which is around 100cm deep at the deepest section.

The teaching pool during the day is essentially the toddler pool. I have seen adults in the teaching pool earlier in the morning when it's quiet- and good on them, to build their confidence etc.

But the last few weekends at the busy sessions there's a man alone in his late 60s who just sits there in the corner watching everyone. I just can't imagine why he would choose to sit in a pool full of screaming and splashing children other than the more sinister reasons. I have tried to find the logic -e.g. he is entitled to use it but why would someone of retirement age only be able to use a pool on a Saturday lunch? Could he just be lonely and oblivious to the weird vibes it gives off?

Am I being unreasonable to ask the centre to perhaps look to separate lone adults using the teaching pool from the busier sessions with children?

Voting:

YABU: The world doesnt revolve around children
YANBU: This could be a safeguarding issue

If you are uncomfortable with his presence then I would either go elsewhere or a different time to avoid him.

I don’t think the leisure centre can really do anything even if they agreed with you about it being a little odd. You can’t assign the toddler area as ‘child only’ due to the need for adults to assist. You also couldn’t really dictate numbers of adults to children as often grandparents are there alongside parents. I suppose you could put up a sign saying all adults need to be accompanying a child but then you’ve got to be prepared to police that and do they have the staff to patrol the pool? I doubt it.

I go swimming a lot. My gym has a tiny pool but it's warm. Something I've realised is that loads of people like going to a pool but not doing any swimming. They just stand there. In the way

It drives me mad

You're being unpleasant and unreasonable.

sadly, one day, you might yourself understand why he's there. Physical pain, loneliness, having to do things at a time that suits people helping you, not when you'd prefer to go.

people (yes, even men) can enjoy watching children /families playing & having fun, just to feel part of life not for dubious reasons. Maybe he never had the grandchildren he wanted or they live overseas/are estranged.

maybe (as others have said) it gives him some pain relief (& maybe he can't get in/out of the bath)

separate sessions are neither practical nor necessary.

if YOU feel uncomfortable why don't YOU go at another time?

... and yes, I go & sit in the playpark sometimes because I like watching & hearing the children play, rather than sitting on bench in the empty adjoining playing field. FFS it's not criminal to actually enjoy having people around you.

just go elsewhere if you're not comfortable.

My little brother 58 years old, goes to the toddler pool as he has it really badly but mostly in his spine and legs. He loves being weightless and the heat eases the pain...

Big difference here is that he does it in the evening when there are no kids in the pool ..

It could be something like this but seems strange and mentioning it to the pool manager is the sensible thing to do.

Yanbu OP. Perverts are far more common than these faux-naive posters are making out. And they are more likely to be found near small kids when they have no need to be there.

Everyone saying "maybe he has arthritis" are clutching at straws because this man is deliberately choosing to surround himself with scantily clad children. There are other times he could use the pool, even if he works, but as you say he might be at least semi-retired.

There's a playground near me, part of an enormous park, where a lone man sits around and wanders between the equipment. Clearly no kid with him, and choosing that playground over any other bit of the large leafy park. I've seen him there more than once, the most recent time, a dad engaged him in conversation and he left.

Why do people think perverts are rare. I've known more than one man IRL get arrested for doing horrific things or having simply horrific stuff on their computers. These men are ubiquitous.

If a man is behaving oddly around many semi-naked kids, there's a likely reason and arthritis is not it.

Ah, so you're ok with men in the pool, but only if they can produce a child, because men with children are never pedophiles, it's only ever lone men.

You see how daft this sounds? I get why you've clocked this bloke, but he hasn't done anything wrong. He's in a facility that he's perfectly entitled to use, and he's no more of a risk to your kids than any other adult there. So keep an eye on your kids and report if you spot any actually dodgy behaviour.

Round here if you get the bus there’s literally a two hour window you can go swimming on a weekend because the first bus is late and the last bus is early. By the time you walk to and from the leisure centre and get changed you’ve got two hours max in which to swim.

You don't need to make him feel bad, just strike up a conversation, most people are very happy to have a chat.

That isnt the case here. We are in London, the pool is well served by frequent busses and the sessions in the teaching pool run hourly from 6.30am.

If you're genuinely uncomfortable then surely you speak to the manager of the Leisure Centre, not start a thread on MN to whip everyone into a frenzy about paeodophiles in swimming pools?

@redrighthand83 I am disabled and love to swim. I need proper steps to get in a pool and so our training pool is much better for me to use.

I tend to swim a few lengths and then stand by the side for a bit possibly doing some stretches. Then swim again etc. I always try to go for adult sessions.

I could justify him using the training pool as it’s easier to get in and out, but just sitting there the whole time is very unusual. Like you I would be concerned he picks a time full of children and doesn’t even try to swim, do stretches etc.

@indyocean

sorry, I hadn't got the memo that you're the only person who counts.

I have replaced joints, the water is amazing for pain relief, I'm not sure why my use of the pool is not as important as yours.

shall I stop breathing as well just in case it's annoying you?

why don't you ask your gym to divide the pool up? Though it doesn't sound like it's designed for proper swimming anyway.

Its only daft to people who think that whole demographics of society are the same. THAT is daft, and stupid.
Why on earth would i think that just because someone has a child, they are not a predator? I am fully and sadly aware that they are around, all the fucking time.
This is about lessening the chances.
And even if this guy is completely innocent, for HIS own protection perhaps adult only sessions would be better for him, because one day someone isn't going to be as understanding.

Our teaching pool is cordoned off during lessons. Could this be something you suggest to the instructor as feedback?

I imagine having other children in the training pool at the same time as a lesson is quite disruptive. Parents of children not attending a lesson are warned prior to paying that the training pool is off limits.

I wouldn't like it either.

Our local council leisure club has a ridiculous design, where the 'hot tub' is part of the kids pool. I'd love to use it more but if I'm on my own I would feel uncomfortable sitting next to where kids are playing.

He may not be able to swim and the 1m maximum depth may be the most suitable for him. Presumably there's nothing stating that this is a children's only pool so he's entitled to be in there.

I'd also add we have adults only sessions but they are lane swimming and the other pool isn't open.

I don't think yabu to be concerned, and maybe you should mention to the manager. It's likely that he is completely innocent, but swimming pools do attract pervs unfortunately.
I'm less sure about separate sessions though, although they might work better in the learner pool than the main pool. Whatever the pool do, it's impossible to suit everyone and whilst older people might be able to swim in the day, lots of childless working people can't, and what happens in school holidays?

No one is saying dads can't be pedos as well. Your logic isn't sound. If one sees a dad at the pool behaving oddly, odd touching other odd behaviour etc, no one rules him out because he's a dad.

The difference is, this guy is being even more obviously suspicious.

No ordinary bloke with arthritis would choose to treat his arthritis while surrounded by lots of semi naked toddlers.

And if he doesn't answer you, he's guilty because you say so? No adult has to satisfy your prurient curiosity when they're doing no wrong. My late OH sat on a bench reading his Kindle on the edge of a playpark and he was, within a couple of minutes, harangued by a couple of mummsies about his being there and when he declined to engage they got worse. It only stopped when I rolled up with our grandchild who had been in the icecream shop down the road.

@NeedTheSeaside

It's a swimming pool: for swimming. A form of exercise. At a gym

Not a bobbing pool

The older members are always swimming I the swimming pool. I find it's younger ones who like to just bob

Do you generally think people who don't work have no restrictions on their time?

Voluntary work, family commitments, caring responsibilities?

Arthritis and not wanting to get in the way of the Lane swimming?

No?

I am making a generalisation. Only thick people think that means EVERYONE mentioned.

shall I stop breathing as well just in case it's annoying you?

Crikey! 🙈