AIBU to off DD financial reward for GCSE grades?

[BlackBean2023]

DD is going into y11 and last year I made a deal with her- every 9 gets £200, every 8 £100 and every 7 £50 (she's at a selective school- straight 7-9s not unusual). I've doubled the amount as a motivator for Spanish and chemistry where she's not trying and currently predicted a 5.

She told my SIL yesterday who said it's out of order but would tell me why she thought so. AIBU? I can afford it and DD is motivated by money. The grades are reasonable and obtainable for her.

SIL doesn't have teenagers so it's not a cousin comparison thing..

No, because

1. They should learn to motivate themselves to learn because they want to do their best not because of cash, and

1. The best grade might be unachievable. There are some.children who simply can't get 9s. Others where a 4 is fabulous. For the latter this cash offer undermines their achievement.

We never gave money for results, we celebrated effort..pocket money was linked to school effort grades.

No we didn’t watch TV. It was probably good for us. We didn’t insist on testing our children. We were there if they needed us to. My brother told his son to revise and then went off with his friends. When our children were at University they did most of their revision in their accommodation. We didn’t do their homework for them although my husband did spend a lot of time helping them understand things.

In real life the only reason effort I important is because it leads to results. If someone is shit at their job I don't care that they are trying really hard, they need to move to a job they are competent at. Some jobs are harder than others so should be paid more. Just because someone else works just as hard doesn't entitle them to say the same pay. Examiners who are efficient get paid the same per gcse script marked as those who take hours.

No and we wouldn’t have needed to.

But for this reason I think that assessed coursework isn’t fair. Some parents do help with this

That was my first thought! I recall my Year 11 tutor group having scales of rewards for their GCSEs some even had penalties for grades below expectations. I was never sure how much good it did though, it seemed to motivate the middle of the road pupils to try to turn their Ds into Cs, the really high fliers saw the top grades as their reward and the lower ability/inclination really couldn't care less.

Not a good idea imo. You cannot predict what's going to happen over the next few years - look at the last few! Look at this year's GCSE takers whose results suffered thanks to the movement of grade boundaries & government expectations - arbitrary bullshit. I've just been through this with a high achieving son throughout his GCSEs but that combo of exam stress & exam board BS meant his results were not close to what was expected.

Reward her effort rather than the result, there are too many factors out of her control for the moment of exams, she can only do her absolute best up to that point in work & then revision. Focus on that, it's more valuable to her.

Cos if it all goes tits-up in those last moments those grade-linked rewards are meaningless. And those are high expectations when you consider a 4 is a pass!

Cos if it all goes tits-up in those last moments those grade-linked rewards are meaningless. And those are high expectations when you consider a 4 is a pass!

Yeah I think that a lot of posters advocating this are assuming that since their children are capable of getting 9s, hard work will guarantee those 9s. Those of us with kids who got results on Thursday know what a load of BS that is!

The. Counter argument is that research shows that rewarding results is less effe tove than rewarding effort. Our headteacher said there is evidence that rewarding results is less effective than rewarding effort, but I don't know her source.

Solidarity with you, fellow mum. Hope yours got what they needed (grateful mine did), they got really screwed over didn't they. Pre-pandemic expectations yet pandemic learning. What crap.

How do you do this with siblings who were 'given' their grades due to covid? Would you / did you do this with them too?

I agree with this. Studies have shown that people with intrinsic motivation and those who can delay gratification tend to do much better in life.
Both of my DC are high achievers and we never rewarded them with money.

It doesn’t sit well with me because I don’t believe that it’s good for a child to be judged by their parent/s on the basis of something that I class as superficial like a grade. My DS has just done his GCSE’s and I did give him a financial reward but that was before the results were in. We also booked a celebratory meal before the results were in because I wanted to make it clear that the results didn’t matter to me, what mattered was how hard he tried……. I suppose I want my kids to know that they’re good enough to me. Always.

What you’re suggesting has worked for my son’s friend though so there’s that side to it. I think you know your dd so trust your own judgement and don’t let anyone tell you what’s best for your your child, they’re all different after all!

Good luck, I’m glad I’m not doing it again for a couple of years 😂

I wanted to make it clear that the results didn’t matter to me, what mattered was how hard he tried……. I suppose I want my kids to know that they’re good enough to me. Always.

Absolutely this.

Just because you can afford it and just because it might ‘work’ doesn’t mean it’s not damaging to their self-worth.

People on this thread are missing the point spectacularly.

Grades were higher this year than 2019 though so either the pandemic didn't affect their learning or there was still some leniency compared with pre pandemic.

We offered DS £50 for every Grade 4 or above, he needed to get a minimum of 4 Grade 4’s including Maths and English to get on his college course.

It worked like a charm and he passed all 9 at Grades 6 and 7.

If you can afford it then do it!

Depends on which type of school you went to & which area. You can compare the grade boundaries online between the years & see, quite clearly, this cohort has suffered vs other years. Eg, a friend's daughter failed her maths resit, but her score on 2019 boundaries would have seen her pass. As a result she can't continue her mechanics course at college.

The questions aren't exactly the same each year so grade boundaries don't tell you that much. The grade boundary might be higher but maybe the questions were easier. To get a true idea of how hard or easy it was this year compare the proportion of people who got each grade with pre pandemic years.

Never needed to financially motivate my DD - getting the grades she needed for sixth form and uni was enough motivation. DS is starting y10 in sept and will be same for him. I can’t understand bribery to get better results myself

@Scarfweather

Exactly. Getting the grades is the reward. Giving money is just so crass and reeks of desperation. Kids pick up on that.

Getting the grades is the reward. Giving money is just so crass and reeks of desperation
To be fair, we were when it came to Ds1. It was a solution to a temporary problem and got us over the bumpy hill.
However it worked and he is now an adult. His work have put him through his degree and he is planning on doing his masters.
He had no interest at doing further ed at 16. He got an apprenticeship and found d his place in the world.
Without an incentive I doubt he would have got any GCSE at all.
What doesn't work for some kids and families may work for others.
Ds is now highly ambitious and doing well on his field.
No regrets for giving him a financial perk.

Our kids are tiny but me and my husband have already discussed that we'll do the same as you although no idea what the amounts will be. I see no problem in it. It's a good incentive, presumably parents want their children to get good results so they can go on to earn better and live lives with at least slightly less financial strain so what's the difference with this idea? Of course not every parent can afford to do it but most parents will offer some incentive even if not monetary surely? We have said we will be realistic about their academic ability and set the rewards accordingly I.e not push too much for grades that might be unrealistic but push enough to maybe just above what they are predicted so that they have a real chance of achieving it if they really work for it. Unfortunately we are now in the age of 'quiet quitters' and people used to working from home who just have to wiggle their mouse a bit every few minutes to show they are logged on rather than actually working (I have many many friends and family members who joke and gloat about the fact they do this) so the idea of hard work and reward (not only monetary but reward of achievement, success, praise and pride in oneself) being intertwined seems to be a strange notion to lots of people nowadays. I think drumming into them fairly young that they will only be genuinely rewarded through working hard and achieving the best they can themselves is a good thing.

My parents did the same for me back in 2000, think it was £25 for a C, £50 for a B, £100 for an A and £200? for an A - but they did the reverse for anything D or below so I had to pay them. Their reasoning was that I was bright and they didn’t want me to slack off in the subjects I didn’t prefer/value (GCSE Humanities I’m looking at you here) but they did badly out of it as that wasn’t my attitude and I ended up with 1 A*, 8 A’s and 2 B’s. They did say I had to save half of it though and I could have the other half to spend.
I would consider it with my kids in the future but it could be expensive as I have 4 rather than the 2 my parents had! Bit of an extra motivator when the revision becomes a bit boring!

My relative promised mine £400 for every 9. I couldn't have afforded it. He didn't get any 9s though 🤣 he did end up with about £300 worth of gifts as rewards though.

One of my pupil's parents told me they'd said to her they'd give her £50 if she got a 4 at GCSE in my subject. She really struggled and I felt really worried for her in case she didn’t get her grade. I think i was more stressed than she was in the end because I felt so bad !!

The parents were lovely ppl BTW, maybe just didn't quite think this through and just wanted the best for her.

We gave a pound a point. So £9 for a 9, £8 for an 8 etc. The money will be used to buy 6th form clothes.

For DD, the real motivation was that she needed certain grades to stay on for 6th form and do the A-levels she wanted to do. They are the school rules so not much we could do about that.