Toddler running indoors U or not?

[Onomatopoeiadoodle]

I live in a flat with downstairs neighbours. They are complaining about my (almost) 2 year old running indoors.

Do you think a toddler running indoors is unreasonable when you live in a flat, if so what can I do about it as we know toddlers lack impulse control and I can't leave him sitting in his play pen all day.

Any suggestions welcome

Some noise should be expected when living in a flat but you shouldn’t allow your toddler to run about all day. Take them to the park! Make sure you have good flooring and the toddler wears socks or slippers. Take whatever steps you can to limit the disturbance.

Regular noise fine, toddler running about is not fine. If they need to burn off some energy then go for a walk or to the park.

He does go to the park most days and we never wear shoes indoors. I'm continually telling him to stop running and have been putting him in his play pen more often. The problem is insufficient sound proofing throughout the block.

No, that's not okay.

Why would the alternative be to stick him in his playpen? You need to take him out to the park everyday so he can run - small children are like dogs that way

It's a home, he needs to be able to move around however he wants. You might need to add rugs or other soundproofing if it's noisy, but I wouldn't expect a toddler to sit still. If people can't manage a bit of noise then they need to not live in flats, or add their own soundproofing.

See above, he does go to the park most days as we're fortunate enough to have one nearby.

Telling/redirecting doesn't always work as he may be autistic and doesn't grasp it.

If I lived below a toddler then I'd expect some sort of noise, but I'd find it quite annoying if they were allowed to run around all the time/whenever they like. You do have another option other leaving him 'sitting in his playpen all day' and that's to take him out of the house for a while - go to play/run in a park, soft play, toddler group etc (unless of course you have mobility issues/anxiety issues/something else which prevents this happening, and in this case I hope friends/family would offer to help).

Edit - I have seen you do take him out, perhaps you need to take him out more, or otherwise occupy him in the play pen situation?

No, he doesn't need to be able to move around 'however he wants' - you cannot just make as much noise as you like in your house and tell others they have to move if they don't like it!

So hard! all floors must be cArpeted - living below hard floors is horrific. If you’re carpeted, with thick underlay, and toddler has no shoes on, you should be ok (so I suspect this is not the case). But jumping off sofas onto floor - as a continual rather than a one off activity - is probably out if you want good relations with neighbour.

if it were me? I’d sort the floorings if they are hard. Then I’d go have a chat with my neighbour. Is it early mornings that are the issue? If so, take toddler out or ensure they stay quiet til a reasonable hour. Is it particular noise - jumping off sofa? if so, limit that activity. Try to compromise, whilst explaining that families will not be silent but you’ll try to be thoughtful. Cheek by jowl lives by requires it. Imagine it was you living below a herd of elephant - it can be so draining.

I disagree. Autistic children can absolutely be asked to behave appropriately. It may take longer but it’s entirely possible. Don’t be that person that says the world must revolve around my child - regardless of any, it doesn’t.

It’s unavoidable, surely? My LO goes to the park everyday and some kind of playgroup/soft play/activity most days… he still runs around at home and I wouldn’t stop him. Physical activity is too important for development.

Could you put some extra rugs down?

Hi its not early mornings it's throughout the course of the day. He was banging at 1pm yesterday, 3pm a couple of days before.

I have already put extra rugs down

I'm constantly telling and redirecting irrespective.

So it’s banging. That’s not ‘normal’ noise if it’s more than an incidental pan/drop/breakage.

Its not me banging, its the neighbour banging on his ceiling in response to DS.

If you live in a flat then noise from the people around you comes with the territory. It's not like it's loud music, it's a kid behaving like a kid.

You can try to keep something of a lid on it but on the whole the neighbour can jog on.

Oh I see - sorry! What was happening when they banged?

In principle you’re right but it doesn’t create good neighbourly relations. Surely better to try to reach an agreement?

I disagree with PP! I don’t think it’s fair to stop your toddler from running about in his home, especially as you take him out regularly. If the only way to stop him is to stick him in a playpen then that is really sad for him and I wouldn’t do it, personally. However, I’d be carpeting with a really thick underlay to reduce the noise as we could afford that. I also would take him out twice a day if possible so that my neighbours have good chunks of time where the flat was properly quiet, and hopefully going out a lot would help to tire him out and reduce the running that way. I’d also try distraction and other games that involve movement but not running. But I don’t think you can ban a toddler from running in his home!

OMG THERE'S AN EDIT HISTORY!!!

Do you mean your neighbour was banging to ask you to be quiet?
I'm assuming that's what you mean.
You take your child out most days - you've put down rugs and you've said you don't wear shoes inside. So I don't think there's anything else practically that you can do.
To avoid things escalating with the neighbour I'd have a chat with them - explain you're doing your best but Small children will make noise - you cant expect a toddler to tiptoe around a place! Sounds like the neighbour is also in during the day so unfortunately for them - they will have to learn to live with a certain amount of noise from upstairs.
Could you speak to the leaseholder about soundproofing?

I agree on the play pen thing - other than a few minutes while you go to the loo/do a job, I don’t think they are a good thing for kids. They need to be able to move around, but not to make noise with impunity when you live so close to neighbours. Only you know whether the noise in question is reasonable or not op.

I think running inside is perfectly normal for a toddler. In a flat, I would try and avoid it early in the morning so that we didn't wake up neighbours but otherwise I think it's normal neighbour noise.

Maybe I am weird though - another thread made me realise that some people have a blanket no running at all inside rule which had never occurred to me.

(Obviously I won't allow running inside somewhere when it's not safe or it gets in someone's way)

But I don’t think you can ban a toddler from running in his home!

Of course you can when it disrupts other people.