Toddler running indoors U or not?

[Onomatopoeiadoodle]

I live in a flat with downstairs neighbours. They are complaining about my (almost) 2 year old running indoors.

Do you think a toddler running indoors is unreasonable when you live in a flat, if so what can I do about it as we know toddlers lack impulse control and I can't leave him sitting in his play pen all day.

Any suggestions welcome

Same approach as FB.
TBH I only tend to edit errors in spelling or accidental wrong words, so it's fine by me. My latest edit was when I actually wrote 'wherever' when quoting someone who had written 'however' - for some reason my brain read what they wrote, understood it, but my hands typed something similar but not quite right. 😆

What's to agree on?

Again, it's not like it's something the OP is doing on purpose or carelessly. It's a kid simply moving around their home. They are allowed to do that.

It seems harsh to ban a child from running about when it’s developmentally healthy and normal for them to be doing so. Especially as OP takes him out anyway. Toddlers are full of energy and movement is part of their normal development. I think some running inside is unavoidable with a toddler.

I definitely think anyone living in a flat needs to be considerate/aware of others - in this case a compromise would be for the OP to do her best to limit running indoors (running in other places when possible) and for the other tenant to accept some noise is inevitable.

They are not allowed to constantly disturb other neighbours though - there has to be compromise on both sides.

It seems harsh to ban a child from running about when it’s developmentally healthy and normal for them to be doing so. Especially as OP takes him out anyway. Toddlers are full of energy and movement is part of their normal development. I think some running inside is unavoidable with a toddler.

Lots of things are developmentally healthy for toddlers, but that doesn't mean they should be allowed to do it all the time regardless of the impact it has on other people.

Yes, some noise is unavoidable but I do think it's unfair to say "well, it's what toddlers do" and expect everyone else to just suck it up.

DS ran across the room

It's not constant though - the kid sleeps, probably still naps and is taken out regularly.

I am sure the toddler is sometimes disturbed by noise too.

I can't see how it is possible to stop him, that's a natural way for an energetic toddler to move about.

You would be spending your whole life telling him off about how he walks /runs about or staying away from your own home to avoid making noise

I have several kids and only one is a noisy runner abouter, so if I only had the quiet ones I might think like PP that you "can and should" teach toddlers to sit quietly when indoors.

but no, if a toddler is a runner abouter, they probably can't just learn not to do it, he doesn't have the impulse control to continually suppress himself

I must be clear that it's not something I ignore, I'm always trying to stop him running. As I said I always discourage and redirect and I've been putting him in his play pen more often aswell as taking him out for lengthy periods most days.

I don't know what else I can do.

Do you ever hear noise from the flat below?

Even without autism you would be constantly redirecting and repeating to a 2 year old. Mine never stopped and you feel like a broken record.
In your situation I would definitely get carpeting down I'm the main living area. But your neighbour can't expect no noise or running about from a toddler, no matter what you do toddlers don't sit quietly on a corner no matter the amount of soft play and park visits. It's a massive downside of living in flats but as long as you are trying to minimise there's not a massive amount more you can do

A toddler can’t be expected to never run indoors but you should be in the process of teaching him it isn’t acceptable. It must be incredibly annoying to hear frequent running above you and if the neighbour is banging then it’s clearly bothering them.

Yes I do.

Is there any way of attaching a voice note to my posts like you would an image because I'd like some feedback on the voice notes he has sent me this morning ranting and swearing

I already am and I've told him this aswell as apologising several times

**If you live in a flat then noise from the people around you comes with the territory. It's not like it's loud music, it's a kid behaving like a kid.

You can try to keep something of a lid on it but on the whole the neighbour can jog on.**

This ^. Your neighbour sounds like an arsehole. I wouldn't stop my toddler from running about in his own home. At that age they all do tend to run about with their small feet, it's just not right to try and restrict their normal development. I don't think there's any good neighbourliness there anyway. If there's nothing else you can do in terms of making the place more sound proof, then I would ignore the ceiling banging or just bang back when he/she bangs your ceiling next. Or better still move out to a more child friendly place if possible. Autumn/winter is nearly here , there's only so much you can keep him outdoors.With the cost of living crisis and energy bills soaring there's only so much you can pay to live in softplay.

I don't think there is anything else you can do, apart from fully carpeting your home. Children run, you already take him out loads, it absolutely cannot be constant - he goes out, watches telly, sits for dinner and goes to bed like a normal toddler so I think your neighbour is well out of order and rude.

I'm assuming you've tried speaking to him and that moving is out of the question?

I was quoted £975 for a carpet and underlay for my living room and it's not affordable for me at the minute as I can only budget to £500 or so and that's all of my savings

Personally I think playpens are fine for short periods so long as they're not too small. I'd just get a bigger playpen (or essentially turn your living-room into one), put foam mats down and buy a little folding toddler slide to give him a physical outlet in your flat.

Then you've done all you can. So at that point I'd tell them to stop harassing you if they keep thumping the ceiling.

I've spoken to him several times he's just a very hostile person. I'm not able to move at the moment unfortunately, I wish I could.

I remember relatives in a nice new build flat (which they called an "apartment") complaining about their upstairs neighbours dc. They were simply moving from room to room, not actually doing anything outrageous. It was always worse in the evenings as the dc went from kitchen to living room, bathroom, bedroom.

If your neighbour is sending you abusive messages then that is not on, contact the (non emergency) police and let them know what's going on. Hopefully they will have a word.

It's a learning process. He'll get it one day but it's going to take a while. For many kids, you need to say something a thousand times before they finally take it in. And there's not a lot you can do that you're not already doing in the meantime.

Anyone who doesn’t have a toddler shouldn’t be commenting!!

I have a 3 YO and between 1-2 YO he was an incredibly active little boy and I wouldn’t have been able to stop him moving around unless I put a strait jacket on him!! I agree children need to go to a park Once or twice a day to burn off energy. But once home you can’t just put them in front of the tv for hours to ensure ‘they don’t move around’ in their own home. This is unrealistic

I have a young toddler- she run everywhere! Your neighbours are being completely unreasonable. It's the middle of the day not late/early. They need to get this comes with the territory of living in a flat... there's noise

Get him some soft soled shoes if you haven’t already. I don’t think rugs are a good idea - he could trip. Your neighbour is part of society and in order for society to flourish there have to be toddlers. Who will run about sometimes. Your neighbour has to learn coping strategies.