I still miss my ex’s mum

[babyface13]

We broke up over a year ago, but I actually still really miss her.

My ex still lived with his parents. We were super close. Whenever I went round there, she’d show a huge interest in my life always asking me questions. We’d go on walks if my ex was working from home, she’d make me hot chocolates and always commented on how well I fitted in. When my ex went on holiday, I sometimes popped over there without him just to have coffee. I lived with them for a while and I loved it.

When me and my ex split up, and I was moving my things out, she cried. She told me I was such a wonderful girl with huge prospects and that she was gutted.

Never heard from her again after that, of course. She had a phase of viewing my stories on instagram even though she had unfollowed me.

I had a dream about seeing her at the shop last night and she gave me a hug and we caught up. It made me realise that I actually still miss her.

I’m well over the ex and feel pathetic even writing this. What do I even do about this, as it’s been well over a year now?

Couldn't you contact her to meet up for a coffee. Hopefully ex is over you now and she might want to keep in touch but not think you would. You've got nothing to lose - if she doesn't want to keep in touch for her son's sake, then she can just say so.

I was about to say the same. If you think you and your ex have moved on enough, maybe you could meet up with her?

She might miss you too. You can agree not to talk about break up and ex.

Life is too short to lose people we love.

As PP suggest, contact her, invite her for a coffee or something and make it clear that it is her whom you wish to see and be friends with, nothing to do with ExBF.

I hope it goes well for you both .

Yes, start a new relationship with her and enjoy many wonderful times as friends through the years.

I was thinking this, but she has since unfriended me on all social media so I doubt it’s welcomed.
I last messaged her last September wishing them congratulations (family baby news) and she didn’t respond.
Plus, ex has a new girlfriend so doubt they’d be best pleased either!

I had a break from an ex and his family for about a year, and then now we’re all pals again. We needed to sort of heal over - but I also really badly missed his mum and sister. This is going back maybe twenty years and I’m still in contact and close with them all. I will ask about the ex here and there but sincerely with no awkwardness, and if ex is around, say at a family event, then we chat like old friends it’s not a big thing. I definitely gained his family from that relationship (even though when we first broke up it felt like I’d wasted so much time).

Oh I’ve just seen your update sorry, it’s a shame she didn’t respond 😕

Only bad thing is, me and my ex are not on good terms either. He ended it really badly (exes mum cried and said it wasn’t my fault) but we really dont like each other now

I know she didn’t respond but I guess it was still raw, we only broke up in the July

I had an apology letter from.my ex's mom.fir his behaviour😫I wanted to keep in touch but decided too mu h had happened. I think of u sent 1 more message, perhaps a txt rather than social media, it is worth a try. If you don't hear anything then at least you know. It will probably be down to nothing to do with u as a person.

I think if you message her and she doesnt reply, maybe she would be scared of upsetting your ex.He is her Son after all,maybe just say something like "Hi Mary how are you,maybe meet for a coffee?" However bear in mind it will be a bit different now if you are not with her Son any more .Do you have a new partner at all ? If so how would he feel do you think .

In a lot of cases, although there is genuine affection there, it’s a matter of loyalty. She’s loyal to her son and if it would make him uncomfortable she won’t rekindle.

Sorry OP that’s tough.

I wouldn’t know how to compose a message that seemed genuine and nothing to do with the ex as well!

I would leave it personally, esp if your break up was not amicable. Messaging his mum would put her in an awkward position. It’s ok to have people we have loved and lost in our lives, and to grieve for them.

Oh that's sad. I really missed my ex's mum as well, she's an absolute sweetheart. I'm lucky in that we are still friends and now I sometimes have lunch with both of them!

Sounds like you really liked each other; as long as enough water has gone under the bridge so to speak, contact her and say you would like to see her nothing to do with ex.

I still keep in contact with ex's best friend and that is because I care about him. We have never mentioned ex because that wasn't the point.

You need to move on. She’s not the only nice woman in the world and she was of course invested in you and your life as you were her sons partner.

It will likely put a strain on her and her sons relationship if you were to become friends and meet up. Of course the new girlfriend isn’t going to like that. Don’t be selfish.

Don’t reach out again, you are putting her in a difficult position where she will now feel bad to not respond to you.

This chapter of your life is over now. Move on. Find new friends.

My ex left 28 years ago. I still see his mum.

In light of your updates, I'd leave it tbh

I agree with PP saying you could contact her and try to rebuild a relationship. It's not often in life that you meet people you truly like.
My sister was very close to her ex's mum and they're still in touch 20 years later!

Sometimes we just have to accept that we will forever miss someone. Don't contact her.

I would leave it. She unfriended you and didn't respond to your message. I think she is telling you she has moved on.
I think you should do the same x

I am still friends with DD’s ex boyfriend’s mother! She’s a lovely woman, with a great sense of humour. I also still like the ex boyfriend and chat to him online occasionally. He said he was sad not to have me as his MIL - we are both Star Trek fans and get on fine. He is now happily married to someone else, and DD has been happily cohabiting for ten years with her current chap - they just weren’t right for each other.
All you can do is offer a meet up, OP, but be prepared for a rebuff if she doesn’t want to take you up on it. There will be other friends in your life, and one of them may be able to fill that motherly role that you feel is missing.

I still feel the same about my ex’s mum and that was over 12 years ago, I saw her a few years across a cafe when my dc was a baby. She blew me a kiss and I think we both had a little sob.

I’ve never stayed in touch though, he behaved so badly but he’s her son.