To get rid of men from my life altogether

[montecarlo7]

I know this sounds a bit barmy but I've been doing a lot of reflecting recently and I realised that men have overwhelmingly brought negative things into my life.

I made a list of the male friends and relationships I've had in the past and I realised there were only 5 who were good men who brought something positive and there were many who harmed me. I'm almost 40 and single.

I've been raped in what I thought were safe relationships. I've been sexually assaulted on multiple occasions, both by strangers and male friends. I've been harassed and catcalled a lot. Two male friends (both partnered) I made in the last few years ended up sexually harassing me. Not the first (or second) time either. My (male) neighbour in my last home harassed me to the point I had to go to the police.

I've had partnered and married men make passes at me over and over to the point that I don't make friends with couples anymore.

The men I've hired in a business or work context have not brought much positive either.

I do have one close male friend who I trust. But I'm thinking that I'm going to have a policy of no more male friends and stop looking for relationships...I'm going to be single and accept it.

At one point I thought this has to be my fault that the men that show up in my world are not that great. But now I'm getting to age 40 I'm starting to reconsider that it's actually them.

I plan to put my energy into female friendships only. I'm in a very female centred line of work and only work with women which is nice. I stopped hiring men for other jobs e.g. around the house if I can work with a woman instead.

I gave up a hobby I had that brings me into contact with a lot of men.

I know women are not all perfect either, but here's the thing. I've never been assaulted, sexually harmed, harassed, catcalled, verbally abused, or had an unwanted pass made at me by a woman.

It's clear that some men are unsafe to be around and that's reason enough to avoid the whole lot of them.

What do you think?

I was just pointing out to the the mad/scared people that it’s not like that many women are done with men, so there really isin’t anything to worry about @Thepeopleversuswork
That’s all.

I am a tad bit confused, if I’m honest, why all these women have to announce they’d never get into another relationship (really, they wouldn’t?) if something would happen to the man/relationship end.
If you’re suffering that much, then jesus! Just leave. What a waste of life. If you are as strong as you like to convice yourself/people here, then go and be single already.

why all these women have to announce they’d never get into another relationship

It’s what the MGTOW twats do as well.

My take on that is those women are happy enough with their current situation, but that if it ended they wouldn't be clamouring for another man to fill the void. And actually can look outside of their personal situation and see the positives in being single even if they aren't currently.

We all know of people (men and women) who can't seem to be single for more than 5 minutes before the next relationship.

How about you actually read what people have written? Many of us are happy in our current relationships. If those were to end, we would stay solitary. In my case, because I genuinely don't believe I'd be that lucky again and see no reason to lower my standards just to avoid being alone.

You grab whatever you can get hold of if that's your jam. Its not mine, that's all.

You're right. I'd stay solitary (well wouldn't be looking for a relationship other than my current friends). After being bullied at school and when I started work I can assure you that I have even less trust of women than of men. Fortunately I'm happy with my own company and do have daughters and grandchildren who are a great source of happiness.

Done with men? Done with people other than those I already know.

And you just sound like a dick trying to come across as clever, but failing.

Just to add - you may not be so great yourself

“don't think men have an iota of sense when it comes to women.”

does that sound balanced or is objective to you ??

What’s your point ?

lets be honest, Germaine Greer is hardly the defender of men. Just saying …

yes of course they would ! They were ( Hindley and West) ad murderous if not more so than their fellow scumbags.

Just remember as I recall - Hindley refused to cooperate with the authorities throughout her life

just pure evil

It's not her responsibility to be friendly to a male neighbour though, it's up to her and her alone how much interaction she is comfortable with, he sounds socially inept.
She has probably expressed through many different forms of communication that she isn't interested but he is either willingly ignorant or lacks the emotional and social intelligence to pick up these cues. Women can feel unable to be direct, confronting rejecting men and whatever they are wanting from us even if it's a smile because we have learnt from men that have been told politely " no " or " we are not interested please stop asking " that we get abuse, verbal, sexual, physical.

If only men could accept direct communication from women without getting their poor fragile egos hurt and do the mature thing of stepping away silently from the interaction and refocusing their attention and efforts where it is welcomingly received rather than resorting to verbal, physical or sexual abuse because a woman has the damn temerity to say no.

Women do not owe men anything.

Total ridiculous rhetoric- not a shred of a intellectual scrutiny being applied here.

God forbid anyone asks you around for a cup of tea 🍵.

Didn't commit any murders until they met their partners though did they.

Umm 🤔 that is a much deeper question. But - Hindley was truly evil

“Brady and Hindley took their puppy to the moors with them to check on John and Pauline’s graves. Myra Hindley is pictured holding the dog by the grave of John Kilbride on Saddleworth Moor”

sorry I can’t paste the link but I have seen from various sources that she was totally unrepentant.

She was. Doesn't change the fact that female murderers are statistically much less common than male ones. That's a fact.

I know what you mean about not socialising with couples, OP.
That's my preference these days, due to the male behaviour and sometimes the wife's assumption I'm interested. Not interested in stepping into couple psychodrama and projection.
My close friends know they can trust me. Not interested in a messy life.

Yes I agree with your point here but on your previous post you stated ;

”Didn't commit any murders until they met their partners though did they.”

Given her notorious behaviour- I very much doubt she wasn’t involved in some sort of horrible crime. Also you can’t just assume because these people are women - that they were somehow brainwashed?

I'm in my 50s. Three brothers, a Dad. A few boyfriends. I have be loved them all but each have totally take me for granted as sister daughter gf who will sort parents do favours. Organise them. I am reliable and thoughtful. They are not.

I have been largely invisible to men. So nobody is harassing me at all. Ever.

Part of me frankly wants to be noticed by men as it's an innate desire to be wanted as sexual being?

I see the deadbeat men and think yeah they're all bloody useless. But deep down I'd love a deep connection with a lovely man.

Who is “they?”

I just wanted to clarify- 10 men that you know or, 100 men or …the entire male population of the planet ?

I just wanted to check 🙄