To be pissed off when people assume my father is my partner?

[catsaregods]

My father is 22 years older than me. Ever since I was very early 20s, people have assumed I am his wife or partner.

For example when I was just 20 we were sat next to each other on the train, and a man on the other side said if my dad is my husband When asking to swap seats. When we have been travelling in foreign countries there have been 'lucky man' comments from locals.

I went shopping with my dad as he was going to buy me a special present for a big birthday, and the cashier also assumed I was his girlfriend!

I get very pissed off about it. Maybe this is a common problem with having youngish parents?

Why does it piss you off so much?

YABU. If they thought your partner was your dad maybe! Just be glad that your dad is youthful and you'll hopefully have longer with him.

Ha reminds me of my first house where the landlord said to my husband 'is this your daughter'. Admittedly there's a 26 year age gap so I technically could be his daughter. Don't let it get to you.

This happens with my DH and his DD as he looks young and had her fairly young; it also makes him very uncomfortable

Could you just say “ha ha, no he’s my dad” and carry on with your day on the probably quite rare in the scheme of things occasions this happens?

I understand this. It’s very uncomfortable having that question asked.

I think it's part and parcel of having younger parents. I've had a similar experience with my dad, but we don't see each other much so it's not happened much.
I understand why you'd be pissed off by it. Unfortunately I don't think it's going to go away.

Have you got any brothers?
Do people ask if they are shagging ur mum 🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️
I had Dd1 at 15 everyone thought we were sisters
I had Dd2 at 38 everyone thought I was her granny.

People just go by first impressions. Like, I have a bitchy resting face, but people, if they get to know me, find out I am better than I look!

Women who have much older partners probably get people thinking their partner is their father.

I don't understand why does this bother you so much.

My dad is 32 years older than me, he took me to an anti natal appointment once, and was mistaken for my baby's dad. I thought it was amusing.

My brother is 45 his wife is 40 and twice she has been mistaken for his mum, that I understand is annoying for his wife.

Yup. My husband had young parents, had him at 18. He used to get that... with his mum. She was flattered to be considered so young. He was embarrassed but like well it's just one or those things.

I used to get that sometimes when I travelled with my Dad. My solution was to call him Dad frequently in public and to the wait staff.

I had this once. I was 14 and my dad was in his mid 40s. Guy told my dad he was a “lucky man to have such a hot girlfriend”

My dad was not happy.

life is better if you pick your battles. Surely it’s not happening all day every day - just let it go.

OMG!

I had to take ds 20 to hospital and took newborn ds with me. The nurses assumed he was the df. Ds was mortified!

Thanks to Covid aging me people assume I’m my DC’s granny.
Maybe the take home message is people will assume stuff, they just shouldn’t say it out loud.

The same happened to me and my dad when I was about that age and he was 34ish. I didn’t even look older for my age, I definitely looked like a young teenager 🤮 my dad was so angry.

My Dad was 22 as well when I was born. Used to get that a lot, Dad thought it was hilarious. When I got married some thought my grandfather was my Dad.
Bad side was as a teenager I could not get much past him, good side was that I had him fit and well until mid sixties. Also he saw my children into their thirties.
Money was more of a struggle in my childhood, but he never ran out of energy, swings and roundabouts

My mum had me quite young and then later married a man a few years younger than her. Ie someone about 13 years older than me.

My stepdad is always mistaken for my partner and THATS bloody awkward!

I had this when I was a teenager. My father was not even a "young dad" for me he was 29 when I was born. But even at 82 he is slim and tall and doesn't look his age.

It feels icky when someone assumes this due to the bond that exists as father daughter. With me as my parents være divorced it was my class mates a few times and I can recall saying in disgust. "That's my dad" it's harder when you have it from strangers.

I do t have an answer for you. Just wanted you to know others get it.

Words to live by!

Would make a great tagline, though would probably kill MN stone dead!

Ive had this from both sides. I just laugh about it and blame good genes for all of us looking young. I had ds at 19, we got called a couple a few weeks ago. A few times people have assumed my dad was my partner, and once that my dad was my partner and son was ours. I do get annoyed being asked for ID though, no idea why.

My father was 34 years older than me. When I was young, people sometimes assumed he was my grandfather (he went grey quite young). When I was in my twenties they sometimes assumed he was my partner.

It's very easy to explain (if you think you need to).

I think people just assume that a man and a woman together are a couple. It's awkward when it's your dad, but can't you just laugh it off, people just assume the most likely scenario.