To think hotels are very child unfriendly

[Ontheclifftop]

We've just come back from a weekend away in a hotel with dd aged 5 and ds aged 3. Three incidents really made me realise how unwelcoming hotels are to young families:

1. When we were checking in after a long drive the kids were letting off a bit of steam. I know how that sounds, but they were just running around a bit, not getting in anyone's way or anything. Two people who were sitting on couches reading newspapers got up and left, one sighing heavily and one giving us a dirty look.
2. At about 7ish the following morning we got a call from reception to say the people in the next room were complaining about the noise. Again I know how that sounds, but dd and ds were playing quietly with some teddies. DS let out one squeal of excited laughing but other than that they were perfectly fine.
3. Following that call I said I'd take them down to the swimming pool as I knew it opened early. When I got down the attendant said it was adult only between 7.30 and 9.00. I explained about the phone call and pointed out there were only 2 people in the pool and I'd do my best to ensure we'd stay down at the shallow end and not get in their way. But he refused to let us in.

The whole thing really pissed me off. What are you supposed to do with young children in a hotel? If they play quietly in the room someone complains. If you try to use the facilities to keep them occupied, you're told you can't.

AIBU to feel hotels are just totally unwelcoming to young families nowadays?

That said I do agree that the UK is far less friendly to kids than any hotel in mainland Europe. People often glare at a child talking in a normal conversational tone but ignore the loud shouty drunk golfers/rugby types

In general, I've found UK hotels aren't as family-friendly as European hotels; but your examples aren't illustrating that the hotel is particularly unwelcoming towards familes/kids.

Letting your kids run around in reception was wrong. If I was sitting in reception, I would be annoyed by their behaviour too. If they can't behave, then one of you should check in while the other waits outside with the kids.

Look at your second example from the perspective of another guest. Someone in a neighbouring room felt the noise from your room was so loud that they were woken up at 7am. How long were the kids being loud before the person complained? Now some people are impatient and expect complete silece around them, which is unreasonable, but perhaps you were louder than you think?

As for the pool, why should they break rules that are in place for the benefit of all guests just for you? I would definitely take advantage of adult only swim times and would not be happy if two young children joined the session.

You need to find a way to amuse your children without expecting others to bend around your needs.

If the hotel rang at 7am to say they had a complaint then the complaint came in earlier than 7am, ergo the noise probably started well before that.

The pool is open to adults only between 7.30 and 9. That is their rule and not open to negotiation or argument.

The place where my kid runs around and lets of steam is outside. I'd have got up and moved, too.

Why on earth would you let your children run around in the hotel lobby? 🙄

The room complaint wouldnt bother me. Children should be allowed to play and i would have told them that on the phone.

And of course he cant let you in the pool if its adults only at a certain time. 🤦🏻‍♀️

This is an interesting one.

I have a 2 year old, who at this current age is incredibly difficult to control (not a case of bad parenting), and of course they get up really early. So i understand your point of view Op that it sucks that he couldn’t get up early but also couldn’t go swimming.

If a hotel accepts children, then surely people can’t be outraged if there is some noise? That’s why adult only hotels exist when you go on holiday.

On the other hand, yes if i managed to get a break in a hotel with my DH and was still woken up super early, i’d be upset lol.

It’s tricky isn’t it. I would love to take my little boy to Bournemouth for the weekend, but I’d be terrified of even staying in a Premier Inn with him. And then i’d need to look at more expensive options which makes the trip not financially worth it.

Nothing of the sort, it just means they don't exclude kids.
I'd object to brats running around in the lobby, & making a noise when I'm trying to sleep.

It's quite usual to have adults only time in a pool - who can swim with kids jumping all over the place ?

Timely reminder of why I never stay in hotels without my stock supply of earplugs. (And yes, I do have a child).

There might be a family like this in the room next door.

We tended to stay in apartments when DDs were little, apart from Premier Inns perhaps which are quite family friendly.

We stayed in a small B&B with them once for a family event but they had to be on their best behaviour!

Two of these things were relating to other guests, rather than the hotel, and were both regarding your children being noisy/disruptive (I v much doubt someone is complaining to reception over one small noise), so not sure you can blame anyone else for those.

And it's pretty reasonable for the hotel to have adults-only swim sessions, not sure why you feel the rules didn't apply to you?

Basically YABU, yeah.

I do think it’s quite funny that an OP essentially posted the opposite of this thread recently and got told off for not booking an adults only hotel, told that all hotels other than adults only are family friendly, and that noise from kids on summer holidays is completely acceptable even if it interferes with adult guests’ experience at the “spa-like” hotel.

Here the OP is being told off for not booking a family friendly hotel, told that all hotels are adults only unless it’s a Premier Inn, and that no noise from kids can ever be allowed to interfere with adult guests’ experience.

MN just likes to argue for the sake of it, basically.

(YABU OP. Just as the previous OP was NBU.)

I have had some terrible experiences over the years. We once stopped in a nice hotel in Dorset. They banned us from using the restaurant. No rules in advance, nothing on the website just sorry no children when we got there.

That being said it is not unreasonable to have an adult only swimming session. There are health clubs I have been too which turn into chaos at 11.00 on a Saturday when the adult session is over. If an exception is made for you then one would need to be made for everyone.

Your children's behaviour caused 2 separate groups of people to leave the area / complain. That is NOT the hotel not being family friendly, they have no control over other people's reaction to your children. Perhaps you need to step back and consider what the situation was like for an outsider.

With regards to the pool, it doesn't seem unreasonable to have a short period dedicated to child-free users. Hotels probably have far more trade from business trips and accommodating those who want an early morning swim before heading off to work makes sense. You might find that later in the day there are times when children take over (e.g. toddler swimming lessons) - should adults complain that it is not adult friendly when the swimming pool is out of use for swimming lessons?

Err okay? You asked what it meant. That's what it meant.

OP this has to be a joke.

Of course children shouldn’t run around at check in, you can’t ask for adults only pool time to change the rules for your kids and I doubt that 1 quiet squeal resulted in a phone call from
reception.

I’d suggest you find a hotel better catered for children, but that also your children need to behave better in hotels.

We’ve traveled extensively and pick smarter hotels as we don’t enjoying ‘family friendly’ ones, we’ve never had a peep of complaint.

Long journey or not why would you let them run around screeching in that environment with no respect for others around you take them outside to wind down ?
To then be annoyed that a guest was probably rudely awoken by your children who obviously weren’t playing quietly at 7am because they wouldn’t of complained about kids playing quietly.
And then to be annoyed that staff followed the hotel rules which are obviously in place for a reason, I have kids but if I was in a hotel without my kids I wouldn’t want somebody else’s kids shouting and splashing at the pool in the adult hours there is nothing worse than other peoples kids when you are getting away from your own.

I don’t think you sound considerate at all and you come across as really entitled. The hotel wasn’t the problem your attitude was

I stayed in a hotel once with my family for one night and swore never again. For me it’s the lack of separate sleeping/living areas, which mean you effectively have to go to sleep when the youngest family member does.

I find Airbnb/ self catered apartments so much better, and more conducive to everyone having a fun time.

Good luck on your next trip, which I hope is better.

This. I’ve only ever stayed in a hotel a couple of times with this sort of set up when dd was young and for a night or 2 for specific reasons. Yes, it pissed me off the pool was adult only at certain times as dd would have loved to go but had to wait.

On the flip side, I have been incredibly pissed off when children joined during adult only swims when I have stayed in a hotel alone. You may just think only one or 2 adults are there so no biggie. But I am disabled. I don’t look it, especially not in the water. Children in a pool when I’m swimming alone would be dangerous to me.

Bottom line, it would be prudent to choose more wisely next time. Your dcs are obviously more disruptive than you think. A Haven is perfect for your dc’s age, a bit pants as they get older. We also took dd several times to Butlins and Centerparks.

travelled Extensively with DD since birth. Lots and lots of hotels. Absolute piece of cake because she was (is) a night owl and didn’t wake up till about noon. No early mornings. No issues having a nice dinner. Often swam later in the day when it was quieter.

guess this is the downside of the favoured 7-7 routine.

@clarebear111 loads of family hotels have family suits with separate bedrooms & lounges so you don't have to do that.

suites!

Running round a lobby isn't acceptable- why not let them round around outside while someone checks in?

Why should a swimming pool let your children in, when the rules are clear that it's adult only?

Honestly there is so much noise in a hotel, I really doubt one squeal was a reason for a phone call to reception- maybe you are noise blind because you are used to your children's noise.

Yes, I have taken my children to hotels at that age and they were very aware to be considerate of others- yes its a break/holiday but doesn't mean they can let lose when there are many other people to consider.

I would just book a self catering place / air bnb were you have your own space were your children can be themselves. I feel hotels are more formal (establishment dependant 😂 )

So harsh responses to op. I don’t think yabu I have a 6&3 yo and hate taking them to hotels have only done it twice and won’t rush to do it again 🙈
i was on edge the whole time that even them playing around would make too much noise. The floors creaked at every move. The walls are mostly paper thin I’ve found in hotels unless it’s 5 star. I plan to avoid hotels for a while where possible!

Starting school must have been fun...