To think hotels are very child unfriendly

[Ontheclifftop]

We've just come back from a weekend away in a hotel with dd aged 5 and ds aged 3. Three incidents really made me realise how unwelcoming hotels are to young families:

1. When we were checking in after a long drive the kids were letting off a bit of steam. I know how that sounds, but they were just running around a bit, not getting in anyone's way or anything. Two people who were sitting on couches reading newspapers got up and left, one sighing heavily and one giving us a dirty look.
2. At about 7ish the following morning we got a call from reception to say the people in the next room were complaining about the noise. Again I know how that sounds, but dd and ds were playing quietly with some teddies. DS let out one squeal of excited laughing but other than that they were perfectly fine.
3. Following that call I said I'd take them down to the swimming pool as I knew it opened early. When I got down the attendant said it was adult only between 7.30 and 9.00. I explained about the phone call and pointed out there were only 2 people in the pool and I'd do my best to ensure we'd stay down at the shallow end and not get in their way. But he refused to let us in.

The whole thing really pissed me off. What are you supposed to do with young children in a hotel? If they play quietly in the room someone complains. If you try to use the facilities to keep them occupied, you're told you can't.

AIBU to feel hotels are just totally unwelcoming to young families nowadays?

Would be great to have a bit more for the kids, not just crayons and paper.

Hotels are basically for adults, so if you take children to a hotel, you need to take responsibility for keeping them under control.

@Agii quite common in Europe & shock horror dc do also run around there at times 😱

I think hotels with kids are tricky. I think people are often fairly intolerant when on holiday because like you they think they have paid for a relaxing holiday and are therefore irritated by anyone seen to be impinging on this. Self catering or the bigger, louder places are probably more relaxing for families as you don't have to expend as much energy entertaining them and stopping them from doing things. I think you are also likely to have a much higher tolerance. Your take that they were just letting off steam or it was just one squeal is likely to not be everyone else's take on it.

Long journey or not you don't let children run around and squeal in a hotel other people are there for holidays as well my h the same as when people go out for a meal and children run around it's not acceptable.

Why does everything have to be family friendly? Look for something that suits you, dont expect all businesses to accommodate you! They have their own demographics to cater to.

My kids are late primary and we meter stay in hotels (unless absoloutley essential) because they don't suit our requirements. But hotels are great for if me and dh go away without the kids.

That doesn't follow

I have stayed in many hotels with my children over the years from when they were very young and I have never had any problems or felt my children were unwelcome.

1. running around in the reception - how does this look from other's perspectives. If it actually drove people to leave the children were probably being much louder than you think.

2. even in an explicitly family friendly hotel I would be really cross about being woken up with squealing at 7am and I would be mortified if we woke others at that time. That's pretty anti social behaviour.

3. swimming pool - 730-9am for adults only is actually a very family friendly hotel. some hotels only allow kids in the pool for a couple of hours a day. this hotel was giving you the whole day minus 90 mins in the morning for adults to swim in peace.

With your expectations you really need to book something very explicitly family friendly and wait until your children are older before going to a normal hotel. But where ever you go please don't wake up other guests at 7am.

Hotels are basically for adults, so if you take children to a hotel, you need to take responsibility for keeping them under control.

Nope you are getting confused that some hotels are adults only not all. Plenty of adults can't control themselves. I stayed in a travel lodge once & the noise from drunk adults in the lobby was the only time i've been disturbed.

There’s chatter and then there’s 2 children running around being disruptive and not being told to stop.

Because it’s not a play ground.

other people will be trying to navigate through the lobby, including those who may have mobility issues, and shouldn’t have to work around children being allowed to run free.

if your children need to let off steam you find somewhere safe and where it won’t annoy others for it to happen.

I stopped staying at family friendly hotels because of your attitude.

I have 2 children, they would not run around a reception. If necessary then one parent would have checked in and one brought them to the playground.

7am squeals on holiday are not acceptable. I expect some noise but if your children are loud then head out and run their energy off on the play ground or a exploring walk.

Swimming pools need to offer adult only sessions to facilitate all guests. That hour or two of peace can be the making of a holiday.

Whilst I think your attitude is mild compared to the parents who actively ignore their darlings and inflict parenting to the hotel staff.

Well, no? Just because they allow children, that doesn't mean it's targeted at families. I've been in Michelin starred restaurants that allow children and where I've seen children eating, but that doesn't make them 'family-friendly' - it means they will accommodate your child with the expectation that your child is able to behave appropriately in that environment. Same applies to hotels.

Hmm, OP I feel like the early morning playing noise must have been louder than you are saying. Most people expect a bit of noise from other guests and for it to have been enough for someone to call and complain makes me feel it was probably unreasonable and sustained.

The running round the reception would annoy me a bit but presuming you weren’t there long, I would have waited it out for you to check in rather than leave.

The swimming pool thing, rules are rules, what if after you a load of other people came down with their kids and then couldn’t be turned away as you’d been allowed?

Bottom line is others have also paid to stay there and it seems like you think you have a right to disrupt their stay without them complaining.

I think hotels are hard work when you have young children unless they are chain hotels in which you would expect a variety of customers- business, leisure, families, etc

I used to be really worried about noise when staying with the kids, and then realised the kids are paying guests too and laughing and playing isn’t offensive noise considering the noise adults make that can be heard through the walls- including loud phone calls, TV etc.

Although I have to admit to asking to move rooms when on a rare weekend away with DH, the room we were given had an interconnecting door and I could hear kids crying/playing/shouting in the next room through this door. I didn’t complain but just asked reception if there was another room as i’d come away for a break from kids! It was a spa hotel though and I was looking forward to sleeping in!

YABU

OP, a lot of people here are incapable of tolerating other people's kids.

If it's any consolation, one of mine is autistic and very hard to 'control,' some of the looks and comments we've had...

So don't take young children to a hotel. Holiday cottages or caravans are more suitable for a family with young children.

I think your kids were probably noisy OP! However I'm just offering some mum tips here stay in a hotel midweek it's much cheaper and quite overall!

Go for breakfast out or a walk. Make sure you have your plans ready so you can get up dressed and head out ot sounds like your kids were ready to start the day!

Your kids sound unruly and you are making excuses for their poor behaviour. If they can not behave in hotels then don't take them to hotels.

This is a you problem, not a hotel problem.

I think the running in the lobby thing isn’t just annoying - if it’s the type of hotel where people relax, there could be people carrying hot drinks, people with mobility issues or elderly people that kids run the risk of banging into etc. it’s so inconsiderate!

I once went in a weekend away with a friend and our kids, she was much more ‘gentle parenting’ than I am. She allowed her kids to climb all over the sofas and windowsills in the hotel lobby, even when people were already sat on the sofas they were crawling over the back! They were 6 and 4 - I was mortified.

Yabu. I have the kind of children who would definitely run around the lobby, be noisy and want to swim at the crack of dawn too. So we stay in self catering where they can use up their energy without bothering anyone. It's not ideal but that's what we have to do until they are older and more able to stay calm/quiet.

Hotels that are good for families OP

www.fourseasons.com/hampshire/services-and-amenities/family/

luxuryfamilyhotels.co.uk/locations/woolley-grange/

www.watergatebay.co.uk

www.caryarms.co.uk

Not cheap though

Even the fussiest, most whiniest person is unlikely to call reception and complain vociferously enough that reception then call you.... after 1 "squeal". hahaha.

Your DC are clearly much more badly behaved than you appreciate.

There’s chatter and then there’s 2 children running around being disruptive and not being told to stop.

As I've said I wouldn't be sitting in a hotel lobby for some peace & relaxation.